darthel0101

I don't like the idea of stealth spiders blowing up the sub. Remember that most, if not all, of the spiders are now awake and Max and Alice hate causing one of their children to die.

Walking howitzers that can grab an incoming missile and return to sender.

I just gotta join in this festival, too. WELCOME BACK, Magus! ! !

I trust they actually removed that "splinter" this time?I didn't see comment on the outcome of the operation, only the cause.

Why use the crowbar, relax and enjoy them. I wish that I had nieces of that nature to suffer with.

My personal opinion on the matter of the cliffhanger is that it needs to be acknowledged and talked out but with the PTSD effects and other things happening ATT, needs to be put off at least until Tara's family finishes their move into the area. NOTE that I am not saying that they should not kiss, cuddle, or even actually sleep together (most likely as a threesome) but that the emphasis in those interactions should be helping HIM through his emotional quagmire to ground which is a little bit more solid. I also want to weigh in on the inclusion of Becky in dealing with the issue: try having Becky initiate a sit-down with Kayla and Jack as well. The statement that she KNOWS what Jack is going through will be a huge help for him and will help to cement her in the story as well by allowing him to help HER without becoming actually involved with her outside of that interaction.

Alice was watching Max in CHINA via that old satellite. BTW - Max never went to The North Pole, he simply went far north in The Northwest Territories. There is a lot of water between the two.

Now would I do that? nope, never. you would NEVER mislead us by giving us only partial information. ROFLMAO and enjoying every minute of it

ROFLMAO You've put so many characters into this story that you're gonna start pissing off your readers when you have some die so that you can remember who is who. I hate to think about what will happen when you start writing about Nick and crew again. STILL ROFLMGDAO edited because of the damned Android auto fuckup, I mean, autocorrect

I have to agree. The adventures are nice but the personal interactions are what make this story great.

I like the holiday theme and the truly upbeat activities, but I missed seeing Hans in the mix.

I will join in wishing you well on your test.

I stand (well, sit) corrected.

Nope - red shirts refers to Mirror, Mirror. The episode where the transporter sends the victims to that parallel universe where Kirk is a despot and Spock a pirate.

don't you dare

Have Petra drag her mom and Max into the bedroom for an in-depth introduction?

Legion could hijack nerve impulses (remember that Hans was chipped in the pod while waiting on his lungs to heal) and it is possible that Max has a mainframe available for personality download. If that mainframe is available then Legion could simply short circuit Hans' brain after downloading it. Another option is either robot. Their reflexes are sure to be good enough to allow them to shoot the gun out of his hand (too much possibility of death-spasm still causing the shot to get off).

There will be times where your story will need more than one chapter to tell what happens. When that happens, plan the path that your story will take and then write that path. If it doesn't gel with one chapter than use more with breaks where they make sense. You are the one who knows where your story will go; you are the only one who can take it there. Ultimately, you are the one who must be satisfied with your work. WE have the easy job of simply enjoying your presentation.

The point is, I think, that they were being watched instead of how many were watching.

I kinda figured that the deputies would be split on how they view Max even if their boss is against the boy. IIRC, At least one of the deputies has expressed admiration prior and obviously the one who found the rape in progress will tend to support Max. If Alice is able to bring known malfeasance of the sheriff to light then even those who support him might back down and let him take the fall. I do find it interesting just how much involvement the sheriff has with cases which are the purview of the city, however.

I side with having the sheriff eat a bullet to avoid humiliation and exposure. Of course, there will be a death (or two or three or …) among the gang but neither of these options would necessarily mean a funeral in the story. If there will be a funeral involving the core then I would think possibly Tatiana finally finding peace and leaving the way open for Petra to rejoin the core. The story concept here is sounding like Broken Birds with almost everybody being healed by the core person and bonding into a family unit. In this story, there is a little fudge factor with the core, however, and a lot of fudge factor with those being healed. Hans can be one aspect of freeing Suzy from some of HER demons and being able to teach the twins that not everybody in any organization will necessarily believe the same way as the others. IOW - even in a drug gang there can be somebody who is basically honorable if given a chance.

I have to wonder what would happen if Cynthia got chipped early with Legion now self-aware and being talked to by the twins. Cyn is already recognizing her daddy's presense and aware of her manipulations; teach her mind to be truely awesome in comparison to her elders.

Do us a favor and don't make it the DOD discovering what David did to them. Breach of contract is a hard fight and could end up giving them control of the mainframes. They also have computer/signal tracking abilities which rival most countries.

Re-reading BITG and found an issue with the timeline around the divorce court times. Initial court session is Thursday afternoon but they are told the next evening that the next court date would be the next day. That would put official business being done on a Saturday.

My impression was that the nanites would be (possibly were but I cannot find the reference at this time) VISIBLE on a blood smear slide which implies something at least near the size of platelets. AFAIK, most viruses are unable to be seen by an optical microscope.