pippychick

Hi Anon
I write third person but usually pick a particular character and go with their pov for the length of a chapter or a scene. I wrote the scene from the woman’s perspective in the middle (i.e. she felt). But to be honest they enjoyed it – a lot – so they’re definitely going to be doing it again… and again... so if you have a male perspective on this (or any advice at all!), I’d be eternally grateful, since I write the boys’ pov much more often than I write hers.
While I didn’t originally envisage a lot of homoerotic content in this fic, it’s looking ever more likely that one of the guys will be in the middle at some point too. That’s a whole other set of things to think about, I’m sure.
At least they can’t do this in a tent on the road. There’s no way whatsoever that Brienne can stay quiet. No way. And I’m definitely not thinking it would be kind of funny to try it… *smirks* even if I know the other two characters are thinking exactly the same thing. She’d probably kill them. Literally. With her sword.

Thank you! That’s high praise indeed.
That’s terrific. My black cats are all ex-strays, too, and they just make me happy.

Oh, the mortuary attendant belongs to CloverReef. Honestly, I’d steal him in a heartbeat, but he’s a zombie now, and I’m alive. It’d never work.

Occurs to me as I’m writing this now that while the boys swear in their thoughts all the time, Brienne doesn’t even use the word ‘cock’ in her own mind. This is an extra challenge that I should probably have foreseen when I said in my AN: “Of course I’ll be continuing in Brienne’s pov!”
Bloodyhell… *sighs*
 

I think he’s going to go with a good amount of lubrication at the back and the front, worked in nice and deep for a while. And all over the two of them before they start. Never too much for this.
Um… I seem to have made Clegane quite… well, kind of well proportioned too. *coughs, and gives Brienne an apologetic look*
She’ll be all right. I do have some power here. Although I have to admit I should probably have seen this coming right at the beginning. I didn’t, because I was too busy trying to solve the will they/won’t they slash issue that came up. By the time I’d done that, Tormund had already got it as a little ambition. And by ‘little ambition’ I do of course mean life goal. They’re all going to die. He wants this first, like the last meal of the condemned or something.
I’ll make him pay later. When they’re all in Tarth and he’s having to wander around half naked, and he can’t sleep at night because it’s too hot. She can laugh at him then. I really think he’ll hate it. The chances of these three being able to settle anywhere except the north are zero.
 

I think he’s going to go with a good amount of lubrication at the back and the front, worked in nice and deep for a while. And all over the two of them before they start. Never too much for this.
Um… I seem to have made Clegane quite… well, kind of well proportioned too. *coughs, and gives Brienne an apologetic look*
She’ll be all right. I do have some power here. Although I have to admit I should probably have seen this coming right at the beginning. I didn’t, because I was too busy trying to solve the will they/won’t they slash issue that came up. By the time I’d done that, Tormund had already got it as a little ambition. And by ‘little ambition’ I do of course mean life goal. They’re all going to die. He wants this first, like the last meal of the condemned or something.
I’ll make him pay later. When they’re all in Tarth and he’s having to wander around half naked, and he can’t sleep at night because it’s too hot. She can laugh at him then. I really think he’ll hate it. The chances of these three being able to settle anywhere except the north are zero.
 

A good amount of lube is never a bad idea with going around the back, and if Tormund from the TV show is built on the scale of Tormund Giantsbane from the books it’s gonna be necessary!

Thank you!  
I do have fun with the old stories, and the legends which always seem to me to have a basis in truth. It’s funny, but I think, with all our modern sensibilities, when we come face to face with the other side, we all turn a bit craven. We’re no longer accustomed to dealing with it. It doesn’t mean it’s not there, though.
And having heard the family Bain Sidhe once in my life, I think it would be a fitting punishment for Connor were she to visit him on behalf of those he’s led to their doom, one way or another, because no one ever returns from the barrows… 

I don’t mind the handholding readers through the worst of it.  (Tags tend to be blunt instruments, no distinction between a few snow flakes and a blizzard, but that’s a digression for another day.)  Also, I tend to write minor2’s as young adults.  And I love to mess up my characters   [as an example from Dale’s Game, Dorcia’s family tree has some ingrowth to it.]  
In this universe, priests do tend to be pedophiles, so I’ll let you work that out with the Reverend, but he also does believe at least some of what he’s saying, or at least in what he’s trying to achieve in the long run, ignoring his fetish for Altar boys.  I do have plans to explore some of this in Dolbourne Chronicles, which I’ll get back to after I finish “the repair guy” … it’s a convoluted journey, and I enjoy writing these oneshots to focus on a narrow bit of plot/character development.
Thanks for the feedback, and I’ll let you have fun with the mortuary attendants..
 

Well, I went back, and it seems I wasn’t that far off the end, after all. And you were right, I ducked out at the worst bit, just as it was about to be over, lol.
So all in all, good. I can’t decide whether the actual adults in this world (I know this is Minor2, and really your characters are old enough for me to think of them as young adults, but for the sake of argument, I’m on about the old people) are just as fucked up and believe all this stuff, or if they’re kind of sinister. I’m going with sinister. Oh, and I still think that campsite had a lot to do with it. Take one mentally unstable young man, add a dash of terror (because that kind of place does bring terror, whether you’d be up for admitting to it or not), and this could easily be the result.
No one likes to hang around dead people except for slightly creepy mortuary attendants…

The scat part’s pretty short, once you’re past that, it gets…  well, not spoiling it for others.   (I didn’t really feel like marking up with signs “scat start here!” and “scat ends here!”.)   I do intend to bring that particular character back in the future, so this story was character development, to a degree.
 

LOL I was gonna say the same thing earlier about good critical reviews. But I was scared that would discourge people from reviewing kuz they didn’t wanna hurt me lol. But you put it well. I know they’re good for me and I want them, even if they sting. Seriously though, fuck dental work. 

Admittedly, even a critical (honest/balanced) review can leave me stinging a while.  It’s kinda like getting dental work, I know it’s good for me, but it hurts to receive it.   But this one wasn’t even that, so for you Clover …  

Yeah, usually bad reviews leave me stinging for a good week. This one, I was upset for an evening, and even then, being overtired and having had a shitty day probably contributed to it. Especially when they sign it “none of your business”, it’s so obviously someone just trying to ruin someone’s day. 

That review seems weird and confusing…. 

Reviews like that are singularly unhelpful, and in my opinion, speak more about the reviewer than the story. When I see an inarticulate grumble like that, it makes me want to read the story, since I can be sure it contains words of more than one syllable, interesting characterizations, and some plot rather than the usual run-of-the-mill PWP wankfest. 

Another one too scared to finished… guess that’s a sign of a good halloween story!     Thank you for reviewing what you did read, and yes, I did go in deeper than I had ever before with story tags.

Ahhh… unfortunately not… and I think you’d be taking your life into your hands if you turned up in their universe and interrupted them right now, lol. The only reason I get away with it is because they have no idea whatsoever that I’m there… *g*

*nods* Yes, I’m envisaging it that way around. Mostly because that way Clegane gets to have those favourite things of his well within reach. He’d like it best there. Edge of the bed might be best, so Tormund can have a foot on the floor, perhaps. It gives him more control if he’s going to be directing a lot of this. I haven’t been specific, but Clegane hasn’t done this before to my mind, so hopefully we can get to see him experiencing feeling Tormund moving alongside him, through Brienne’s eyes.
As for the movement, I think they’d really have to alternate at first anyway, just to ease her in or it’d be a bad experience for her. So it’ll be quite slow to start. Tormund’s got some lengthy kind of prep planned, but even with that, it’s going to be a lot for her to take. There’s a lot of pressure involved on entry, that’s the danger point, making sure she stays nice and relaxed for the beginning, because that’s where it can really hurt if you’re not careful. After that, it should become a lot easier. Luckily, I think she’s at ease enough with them both now, and Tormund is quite good at getting her to accept things. Plus he seems to undersand pacing quite well. He’ll also make sure she’s communicating at all times. Well, until she gets to the point of being completely non-verbal, lol. I don’t think she’s got any idea at all how much she’s going to like this. They keep having surprises lined up for her, don’t they?
Bronx, this is so helpful, everything you’ve said – thank you!

Well, I’m about ready to start. I don’t think I’ve written this before… it hardly matters even if I have, since I’m doing it with vastly different characters. If I had, it would have involved Nimbrethil, and she was dominant, but she definitely wasn’t a Brienne. Not at all. So...
I’ve done the usual oodles of research and stuff, so there’s a lot going through my mind as I attempt this, but if anyone has any tips at all on writing a good double penetration scene, here would be a good place to post them.
The biggest challenge, despite the mechanics, the preparation, etc is keeping these three in character throughout. I don’t see the opportunity for all that much dialogue, which is a bit of a bind. I mean, they’ll speak, obviously, but they’re clearly not going to be talking about anything or asking each other the time of day. Dialogue is usually the easiest way to establish character, which pretty much just leaves action, which is already a really busy area, description wise. Still, it should be quite easy to get Clegane in character there, since Brienne will be looking at him through most of it. Rather more difficult for Tormund. But then I suppose he could have more dialogue, as the instigator of this. You’d think Brienne would be easy, as the pov character, but I don’t think that’s going to be the case. This is going to be overwhelming for her, and having her in character in her thoughts isn’t enough anyway. She needs to display it outwardly.
Mind you, if ever there was a character likely to ask the time of day under these particular circumstances, it’d probably be her. Actually, I can hear her doing it…
But, yes… I’d be really grateful for any suggestions, hints, tips, etc. you guys have.

Writing a scene for me? 
- DP
 

It’s an extraordinary sensation, DP is. I’m sort of assuming Clegane will be the bottom of the cookie, so to speak, with Brienne as the filling and Tormund topping the lot, which is good. He’d have the most experience with this, and he’ll be in the trickiest spot. But for Brienne, it will be an overload of sensation. There is an added level of stimulation from feeling both cocks moving in you, and pressing against each other, with you in the middle. If the men set up a slightly alternating rhythm, it’s absolutely breathtaking. It’s also incredibly empowering, because both males are going to be just as caught up in the sensory overload. They’ll be surrounded in tight heat, and feeling something big and hard pressing against them every time they move, or even breathe. 
I think you’re right about Clegane being easy to keep in character, and Tormund, too, since he seems a natural as a teacher, or guide, for them both. But Brienne? This is miles outside anything she would ever have dreamed of, and I think she will either let them know (“Move! No, don’t move!”), or be reduced to almost animalistic moans and grunts.
But really, this will be brilliant for her, and enormously fun to read, I suspect!

Well, I’m about ready to start. I don’t think I’ve written this before… it hardly matters even if I have, since I’m doing it with vastly different characters. If I had, it would have involved Nimbrethil, and she was dominant, but she definitely wasn’t a Brienne. Not at all. So...
I’ve done the usual oodles of research and stuff, so there’s a lot going through my mind as I attempt this, but if anyone has any tips at all on writing a good double penetration scene, here would be a good place to post them.
The biggest challenge, despite the mechanics, the preparation, etc is keeping these three in character throughout. I don’t see the opportunity for all that much dialogue, which is a bit of a bind. I mean, they’ll speak, obviously, but they’re clearly not going to be talking about anything or asking each other the time of day. Dialogue is usually the easiest way to establish character, which pretty much just leaves action, which is already a really busy area, description wise. Still, it should be quite easy to get Clegane in character there, since Brienne will be looking at him through most of it. Rather more difficult for Tormund. But then I suppose he could have more dialogue, as the instigator of this. You’d think Brienne would be easy, as the pov character, but I don’t think that’s going to be the case. This is going to be overwhelming for her, and having her in character in her thoughts isn’t enough anyway. She needs to display it outwardly.
Mind you, if ever there was a character likely to ask the time of day under these particular circumstances, it’d probably be her. Actually, I can hear her doing it…
But, yes… I’d be really grateful for any suggestions, hints, tips, etc. you guys have.

Okay… so:
I object to having it inferred that I don’t know the difference between fiction and reality. I do. I may at times describe myself as a hobbit, but on official documentation, I tend to go with British, or human if they ask for it (they usually don’t). I object to being expected to feel some kind of additional shame for sexual writing, because frankly, bollocks to that. As someone who has written dark things, and some spectacularly dark themes on despair, I consider that portion of my work falls into the horror/erotica genre, which is perfectly acceptable. While I write fanfiction, a lot of authors who write original fiction have made a lot of money out of that genre. It’s popular enough. No doubt there are people in my life who would be shocked at some of the things I’ve written. Just because I can touch them, doesn’t make a difference. Don’t like, don’t read still applies in their case. I have no intention of changing anything about myself merely for the sake/comfort/enjoyment of others. Ever. Frankly, bollocks to that too. Life is too short for that nonsense. As to you, OP (ForgetMeNaught), I have no idea what you wrote, or of your problems, then or now. I would simply ask that you do not include others in them. You may have changed your mind on what is acceptable, and you are free to do so, but your change in opinion does not mean you should come here and accuse this community of being sordid, distasteful and reprehensible. Nor should you come here and urge others in this community to stop enjoying their activities here. Your issues are your own. I wish the best of luck with them.
That is all.

@pippychick Sad thing is, I wanted something to go Crispin’s way too, and I didn’t give it to myself! After I finished this story I kept getting these ideas about things I could do with him, but then I’d remember how the story ended so I couldn’t. Course, I could set it before the story, but who likes going back in time (Besides every historical fiction writer and reader ever, including me...)? 
I’m so glad you enjoyed it. I honestly didn’t think most people would. Not because of typical writer neurosis, but because it was kinda a weird story where the character development and interactions were all a little off. I wanted to write something like those creepy little stop-motion horror shorts that aren’t particularly scary but are often very artsy and weird in a way reminiscent of nightmares. Most people I know hate those things, but I adore em. Thank you so much for the thought-provoking review <3