BronxWench

You know we’ll are here for you, and always ready to listen, throw things with you (yes, I am an agent of chaos, thank you for asking), and scream a bit because sometimes venting feels better than waiting.
 You are never alone, though, at least not in our little slice of the web.

Frightening, isn’t it? Misdirection is a lovely weapon, and I think it’s being wielded with an extraordinary finesse which belies the actual input of either our tangerine faced shitgibbon or the mendacious war criminal on your end. Neither of them is a bright enough spark.
There was a rather interesting editorial piece about Trump – Dana Milbank posited he actually thinks in tweets. It would explain a great deal.

I really wish you would have waited a bit before piling more criticism on top of the criticism. I have faith your points were helpful and constructive, because you are smart and thoughtful. But when I’ve been beaten down by an unfair review, getting picked apart more adds insult to injury. 

I’m sorry, I don’t mean to criticize you, but I’ve been in this position many times. Received harsh critiques, and when I went to rant about it, got picked apart even more by friends. And even though they had excellent points, the timing was… Well, it really felt crappy. 

A toad’s got more social grace than I do, so, Tcr, I apologize for the lousy timing.

I have all the respect in the world for you right now, DP. Thank you. 

DP: Thanks.  I did look over them, but yeah…  When I’m feeling a little less… beaten down, I’d love to discuss them and hear them.
Pippy: I wouldn’t worry about the concrit you gave.  I didn’t think it was that much and many of your points were valid (especially the double paragraph (you can’t hear it, but there’s still some head thudding against wall sounds going on here)).  (And, no, I see no pretentiousness or intellectual snobbery in your response.)
And, uh…  ‘What about parfaits?  Everyone like parfaits?’  Okay, okay, I can take a hint over all the boos, I’ll be quiet now.
The concrit you and BW have given (as well as CR in the beta sessions) are welcome, just as anyone’s, and I hope it never came across as being the opposite.  As I stated in the forum post, reviews and concrit help you grow as a writer.  This one just felt…  Unnecessarily harsh…  And I needed to growl and moan about it…
 

And on the subject of bad reviews, at least it wasn’t personal. Wait until someone reads a story and then reviews or emails to says something like: “I read your story. Are you okay?” or otherwise speculates on the kind of life you’ve had.
Sometimes, I think they even mean it, which is kind of hilarious.

Wow… things really happen when I go missing. And apologies, but I haven’t read the new chapters yet. There’s a lot going on with me at present :/
I’ve read the review. To me the only positive thing about a review like this is that it’s a possible insight into why someone might click on your story, then leave without reading. It would be helpful, but unfortunately having said that, I get the distinct impression the reader’s lack of concentration had more to do with them than with your story or how it is written.
I’d like to say what drew me was how you began, with the radio announcement, slowly pulling back to reveal the characters. But then since I’m British, the sensation of gathering around to listen to radio announcements about The War has been emblazoned onto our very souls, even though most of us are too young to have lived those times. And btw, I don’t agree with the reviewer that you need to separate pov like that. Merging characters’ points of view seamlessly is something I want to learn, and you manage it very well. While reading, I’ve never once been confused about who is speaking.
Given the subject matter (ie. Nazi Germany), I think the reviewer should really have expected to give more committment to reading. This isn’t a family guy fic. Would you approach a Dylan Thomas the same way you’d approach Pam Ayres? No. Absolutely not. I hope I’m not displaying any intellectual snobbery or pretentiousness here, but really, I do think there are levels of committment that are necessary to get the most out of reading fiction, and especially literature. I mean, you get so much more out of Shakespeare if you don’t read it like it’s a Sue Grafton novel (although you can read it that way if you want. I certainly have. That’s how there comes to be Oberon/Puck slash in the archive). Am I making any sense? I don’t even know. *throws hands up in the air* I’m not comparing you to Thomas and Shakespeare, I’m just saying there are layers. Like an onion. Now I sound like Shrek.
And ok, I am reviewing the reviewer here. I’m going to stop.
Don’t let this get you down, honestly. I know I gave you a great load of concrit when I reviewed, but believe me, the evil beta reader version of me only comes out when it senses it can be of help in some way. I really like your story. I think it’s a brave thing to attempt, and I am looking forward to the darkness there will be in it. I hope for a lot of dark, bitter emotion mixed in with utter despair. Because I have layers too. Like a black forest gateau, you know. Mind, heart, soul… they all like different things. Fruit, cream and dark chocolate.
Anyway, the point is: Don’t be disheartened!
*hugs*

I tend to agree the reviewer didn’t mean to be hurtful, but I still say reviewing after less than a chapter is not really wise. There wasn’t time to get to know anything, really. And reviews like that don’t help because there’s nothing tangible to work on.
But yes, it’s very much like a Youtube scenario. And while we all have our negative/unflattering reviews as part of our rites of passage, at least we can relax and take comfort in knowing NYT bestselling authors get bad reviews, too.

Having read the story in question, which is more than the reviewer did, I respectfully disagree, Des. There is little there aside from a vague desire to improve readability, whatever that it, and a questioning of the beta’s ability to understand character development. There is nothing positive to offset the critique, and quite frankly, that detailed a critique is inappropriate when the reviewer can’t manage to finish the first chapter.
For myself, if I can’t even finish a chapter, for whatever reason, and can’t articulate why I found the story lacking, or should I decide it would be impossible to find a single positive thing to say, I close the page and DO NOT REVIEW. A review without balance is not helpful. It’s what people today call “refreshingly frank” and what I was raised to call shockingly rude.

Ugh…
My advice to the reader is to actually read the first two chapters before commenting. Any story takes a bit to get into. No one knows all the characters after the first two paragraphs, and GRR Martin managed five books so far told from the point of view of over a dozen characters. It takes a willingness to pay attention, in my ever-so-humble opinion, and we don’t always get that luxury here on AFF.
Do NOT take it to heart. There is little value in concrit offered from a partial chapter, I agree, and as we always say, the reader always has the option to click past to a story more to their liking. For my part, I am a devoted follower (although tardy in reviewing, again) and I think if the reader perseveres, they will change their mind as to the characters and readability.

I tend to agree the reviewer didn’t mean to be hurtful, but I still say reviewing after less than a chapter is not really wise. There wasn’t time to get to know anything, really. And reviews like that don’t help because there’s nothing tangible to work on.
But yes, it’s very much like a Youtube scenario. And while we all have our negative/unflattering reviews as part of our rites of passage, at least we can relax and take comfort in knowing NYT bestselling authors get bad reviews, too.

Yeah, I found it to be far more negative than helpful. I don’t think the reviewer set out to be hurtful or discouraging with their advice. They were, but I doubt that was their intent.

You make an excellent point with your youtube analogy, lol. I told him these kinds of reviews are kinda a rite of passage for posting online. Eventually, I think every writer gets at least one, regardless of skill and talent. And reviews are certainly hard to come by, especially in certain categories.

DP: I understand what you’re saying.  It is a review, which is good under normal circumstances.  I have no problem with concrit.  If someone thinks a character(s)’s boring, by all means, point it out.  BW has commented on one of my others about how the characters are a little intolerant (which I admit, is true and, as BW had stated, it does have something to do with their histories…  However, she’s right, I probably should have toned it down because they should have been better able to deal with that).  What set me off was the fact that it wasn’t concrit.  To me, it was more mean-spirited, lacking constructive criticism, and picking only the worst and (as CR pointed out), exaggerated those faults.  I don’t know if you have read the review, but that’s how I saw it.
BW: I agree.  If I can’t finish the chapter of something, for whatever reason (ie. bad grammar, lack of rhythm, improper spelling, et cetera), I don’t usually leave a review.  I haven’t really been reading much lately (job has been draining...), but I try to offer up the positives even while reading and, if I feel it’s a necessary point, I’ll make a point of the negatives.
CR: Well, you and I have discussed this a few times, so…  But you have just as much right to be pissed off with the backhanded slap that was the insult towards the betas.  You and SMJ (who understand and followed the characters, story, and otherwise) are both excellent Betas.
 

Having read the story in question, which is more than the reviewer did, I respectfully disagree, Des. There is little there aside from a vague desire to improve readability, whatever that it, and a questioning of the beta’s ability to understand character development. There is nothing positive to offset the critique, and quite frankly, that detailed a critique is inappropriate when the reviewer can’t manage to finish the first chapter.
For myself, if I can’t even finish a chapter, for whatever reason, and can’t articulate why I found the story lacking, or should I decide it would be impossible to find a single positive thing to say, I close the page and DO NOT REVIEW. A review without balance is not helpful. It’s what people today call “refreshingly frank” and what I was raised to call shockingly rude.

Thank you BW, I was trying to respond to DP and couldn’t think of the right words. 

I would hope a literary critic would have more tact and be more constructive. 

Having read the story in question, which is more than the reviewer did, I respectfully disagree, Des. There is little there aside from a vague desire to improve readability, whatever that it, and a questioning of the beta’s ability to understand character development. There is nothing positive to offset the critique, and quite frankly, that detailed a critique is inappropriate when the reviewer can’t manage to finish the first chapter.
For myself, if I can’t even finish a chapter, for whatever reason, and can’t articulate why I found the story lacking, or should I decide it would be impossible to find a single positive thing to say, I close the page and DO NOT REVIEW. A review without balance is not helpful. It’s what people today call “refreshingly frank” and what I was raised to call shockingly rude.

To not finish a chapter, and review just to call it unreadable and confusing and give advice based on assumptions is not only cruel, it’s tactless and bad form. Good concrit highlights fixable flaws as they are and offers specific, concise solutions, and ideally, highlights your strengths as well. Good concrit does not exaggerate flaws to make you feel even shittier about yourself. 

I may be a little (a lot) pissed off that someone left you a review like that. As well-meaning as they may be, their execution was needlessly cruel, and for the record, I wholeheartedly disagree with their points. 

Okay, now I’ve ranted too. I hope ranting helped you shake some of the icky feelings. We got your back. 

Ugh…
My advice to the reader is to actually read the first two chapters before commenting. Any story takes a bit to get into. No one knows all the characters after the first two paragraphs, and GRR Martin managed five books so far told from the point of view of over a dozen characters. It takes a willingness to pay attention, in my ever-so-humble opinion, and we don’t always get that luxury here on AFF.
Do NOT take it to heart. There is little value in concrit offered from a partial chapter, I agree, and as we always say, the reader always has the option to click past to a story more to their liking. For my part, I am a devoted follower (although tardy in reviewing, again) and I think if the reader perseveres, they will change their mind as to the characters and readability.

Ugh…
My advice to the reader is to actually read the first two chapters before commenting. Any story takes a bit to get into. No one knows all the characters after the first two paragraphs, and GRR Martin managed five books so far told from the point of view of over a dozen characters. It takes a willingness to pay attention, in my ever-so-humble opinion, and we don’t always get that luxury here on AFF.
Do NOT take it to heart. There is little value in concrit offered from a partial chapter, I agree, and as we always say, the reader always has the option to click past to a story more to their liking. For my part, I am a devoted follower (although tardy in reviewing, again) and I think if the reader perseveres, they will change their mind as to the characters and readability.

If there is then I don’t know where they are.  Still, we’ve almost survived this summer now.  If this really is the worst of it over then I almost feel triumphant.  Mother Nature did its best to try and kill us, but it failed!

I know we have cooling centers here in the extreme heat, where the elderly and children can go to cool off in air conditioning. Is there any place there which might offer that for your mum’s sake?
I honestly wish I could channel some of our winter down your way, I really do. Those temperatures are simply madness.

Hopefully, she’ll get and feel the full benefit of the cooler air now… *hugs you both… after coming in from the sleet outside*

Mum was really struggling.  If that had went on any longer then I don’t know what I would have done.