LordOfLust

Stop teasing us Sensei! Discussion page

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Hello everyone LordOfLust here! I guess I don't really have to tell you what this page is about.

This is where you can post your ideas for the future chapters of my story as well as tell me your thoughts about what is currently happening in the story. I know there there were a few people who didn't like the last upadte I made and decided to flame, therefor I'm making this a place where I can discuss with you guys and hear your thoughts.

To the new ones here who don't know the story: http://naruto.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600105952

Fair warning to all new readers. This is a cheating story that focuses on Kushina, where she will slowly build an affair with her students and even more people in the future.

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the last chapter feels like something very forced

I'm sorry, but could you be a little more specific? I'm always looking for new ways to improve my work and if you told me what exactly it was that felt forced, then I would be able to improve on it in the future chapter :D

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Guest Natsu over power 1930

not really know how to explain it. usually the quality of detail is very good and development is interesting ... but in the last chapter felt like I was reading the story of another author. it is as if you had been pressured to publish a new chapter and Naruto's disqualification did not make sense

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not really know how to explain it. usually the quality of detail is very good and development is interesting ... but in the last chapter felt like I was reading the story of another author. it is as if you had been pressured to publish a new chapter and Naruto's disqualification did not make sense

I see, well I'm happy to tell you that I wasn't forced to write it, though you aren't wrong, maybe it was more rushed than anything, mostly because I really suck at writing fights and just wanted to get it over with as soon as possible. As for Naruto's disqualification I'm suprised of how angry people got over it, I will try to better explain it in chapter eight and hopefully sort everything out.

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Grammar and punctuation could definitely use work. But as it is, I'm glad that it's comprehensible. I really hate it when I have no idea what the authors are writing in their stories.

One good thing I would like to point out is that you had a small part of the story in one of the latest chapters where Minato actually has sex with Kushina, which was quite surprising to me since most writers wouldn't even do so, stating that Minato was too tired or he wasn't in the mood, thus leaving Kushina lustful. So props on doing the opposite of what I thought you would do. Glad that you did that.

While I didn't exactly like the fact that Kiba beat Naruto, I did appreciate that you made him use some kind of drug to enhance his physical qualities instead of doing it purely by himself. I do agree that it comes off as quite forced since almost every chapter has sex of some kind in it and he won because of the reward from Kushina. I personally would've found it more funnier if he had lost, getting nothing more than a tease from Kushina since he failed. Not every chapter has to have smut, y'know?

One thing I would like to have an update on in the next chapter is about Anko and the 'twelve-inch' man. Even if it was fake, I'd like to see Anko lie to Kushina about it to see her reaction. Would be interesting to see what she would do if the biggest size she knows is Kiba's six incher.

Last thing I'd like to say is to not let any of the hate comments get you down or cause you to write poorly. Just take the criticism from their comments and move on, improve your works and make it better with every chapter.

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Guest Natsu over power 1930

I just read the reviews on this story. some are just insults the last chapter -_-

those people should calm down a bit considering that lately only appear yaoi stories and stories where Kushina lost soul in Chapter 1 , not to mention those stories are abandoned after chapter 1 or 2

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At the author's option, anonymous reviews can be disabled. This can be done quite handily from the Control Panel, in the Edit Profile section, where a click-button appears labelled Anonymous Reviews. It's a Yes/No dropdown. This will require readers to be logged in to an AFF archive profile to leave reviews if the anonymous reviews are disabled/set to No. It is likely to cut down on the offensive reviews..

However, if the author chooses not to disable the anonymous reviews, we can only conclude that the author doesn't mind the nastygrams, and we won't take any action other than suggesting the author delete the offensive reviews himself.

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Grammar and punctuation could definitely use work. But as it is, I'm glad that it's comprehensible. I really hate it when I have no idea what the authors are writing in their stories.

One good thing I would like to point out is that you had a small part of the story in one of the latest chapters where Minato actually has sex with Kushina, which was quite surprising to me since most writers wouldn't even do so, stating that Minato was too tired or he wasn't in the mood, thus leaving Kushina lustful. So props on doing the opposite of what I thought you would do. Glad that you did that.

While I didn't exactly like the fact that Kiba beat Naruto, I did appreciate that you made him use some kind of drug to enhance his physical qualities instead of doing it purely by himself. I do agree that it comes off as quite forced since almost every chapter has sex of some kind in it and he won because of the reward from Kushina. I personally would've found it more funnier if he had lost, getting nothing more than a tease from Kushina since he failed. Not every chapter has to have smut, y'know?

One thing I would like to have an update on in the next chapter is about Anko and the 'twelve-inch' man. Even if it was fake, I'd like to see Anko lie to Kushina about it to see her reaction. Would be interesting to see what she would do if the biggest size she knows is Kiba's six incher.

Last thing I'd like to say is to not let any of the hate comments get you down or cause you to write poorly. Just take the criticism from their comments and move on, improve your works and make it better with every chapter.

Yes I'm well aware that my grammar is far from perfect and will most likely never be perfect. English isn't my born language and I still have a lot more to learn, but I believe that the only way you can improve upon your writing is to just write even more.

I'm happy you liked the part with Minato. I did so in hope of pointing out that this is more a cheating story rather than pure ntr, even though they usually walk hand in hand those two tags. Kushina will never go through a complete mind break and will always return home and love her husband and son. I suppose the core in the story is the thrill about cheating and put Kushina in many different close situations were she is almost caught by either Minato or Naruto.

Even before I made chapter seven there was already comments to on earlier chapter pointing out that now Naruto's parents were alive he had to be some kind of OP beast. I see now that I failed to make him so. I did try and make Naruto look good though, he would have won the fight if Minato didn't step in and I've even gave him some control over the Kyuubi, though I see that it wasn't enough.

Might be interesting to vreate a random new OC with 12 inches, though my original plan was for it to be a lie though and when Anko actually came to his house what she got was 12 inches divided by five and from that point just try and make some random funny scene.

Lastly thank you, salty people don't really get to me, let them eat cake. B-)

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Guest black storm

hello, at the end of Chapter 6, Konohamaru goes to kushina for train him, are you planning to do something with that little piece of text

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hello, at the end of Chapter 6, Konohamaru goes to kushina for train him, are you planning to do something with that little piece of text

Maybe, but then it would first be a flashback, since it was just after the chunin exams and now we have gotten a bit further if I did make a flashback giving Konohamaru and his friend some sort of fun, then it is possible that he could become a recurring character, though since he is even younger thna her students, then he wouldn't be given any impressive size in the pants.

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Guest Guest kushina is A Slut

:unsure:I believe you presented Naruto in a underestimating matter let me try to explain, Naruto has both his parents so he must have been the top of his class since the village is not neglecting him anymore it's unrealistic to show Naruto being defeated when he could have used the chakra chain bloodline in one of the chapters. The story is excellent but please make Naruto atleast stronger and have fan girls like sasuke since their both the last of their clan.

And lastly I can't wait for a gangbang scene it will extremely hot if Naruto and minato were to almost walking while kushina is getting banged in all three holes by her students.

Overall the story is thrilling and exiting just please make Naruto seem more mature and strong that's all I ask keep up the good work

 

 

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I understand where you are comming from, I find Naruto pretty hard to write seing as how he is pretty much a new charcter with his parents alive. I do want to make my readers happy as much as possible and my portrayel of Naruto clearly wasn’t that pleasing. I just though of Naruto as more of an above average student, while not one aiming for the top, he would still belong up there.

I’m not very good at fight scenes and may have written of Naruto as too much of a weakling, this wasn’t my intentions or maybe I simply made Kiba OP all of a sudden. 

The thing is that the three student have their own personalities and wishes with Kushina.
Komachi wanting to surpass the hokage, by trying to steal his wife.
Takako simply has a crush on Kushina  and is more quiet and reserved.
And then there is Kiba who sees Naruto as a rival and will attempt to surpass and to some extent even try and humiliate him.

I will attempt to fix Naruto for the story in upcomming chapters and hope you as well as other people who read this forgive me for my past mistakes. :unsure:

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Guest Kushina Whore

Thank you for taking it into account and make him at least popular with fangirls like sasuke

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Guest Kushina cocksucker

Hello lordlust I'm a big fan of your work the plot and snut interwine perfectly with one another very organized work. I would like to mate a suggestion for your upcoming that will really big a new level of excitement why won't you make a scene were Naruto walks in on kushina getting pumped in all three holes but the main cast and Naruto suddenly feels immobilized and can only speak stutters of "why are you doing this mom" and kiba humiliating him buy showing how he dominants his mom make kushina feel very aroused in the situation and after it all make her take away Naruto memory of it happening at all you can probably after the chunin tournament that will be really and I mean realllllllly hot and sexy exotic can you please make a chp based on this plot it be very pleasurable indeed. Thank you

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Guest Kushina cocksucker
Just now, Guest Kushina cocksucker said:

Hello lordlust I'm a big fan of your work the plot and snut interwine perfectly with one another very organized work. I would like to make a suggestion for your upcoming chps that will really big a new level of excitement, why won't you make a scene were Naruto walks in on kushina getting pumped in all three holes by the main cast and Naruto suddenly feels immobilized and can only speak stutters of "why are you doing this mom" and kiba humiliating him by showing how he dominants his mom make kushina feel very aroused in the situation and after it all make her take away Naruto memory of it happening at all you can probably after the chunin tournament that will be really and I mean realllllllly hot and sexy exotic can you please make a chp based on this plot it be very pleasurable indeed. Thank you

 

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21 hours ago, Guest Kushina cocksucker said:

Hello lordlust I'm a big fan of your work the plot and snut interwine perfectly with one another very organized work. I would like to mate a suggestion for your upcoming that will really big a new level of excitement why won't you make a scene were Naruto walks in on kushina getting pumped in all three holes but the main cast and Naruto suddenly feels immobilized and can only speak stutters of "why are you doing this mom" and kiba humiliating him buy showing how he dominants his mom make kushina feel very aroused in the situation and after it all make her take away Naruto memory of it happening at all you can probably after the chunin tournament that will be really and I mean realllllllly hot and sexy exotic can you please make a chp based on this plot it be very pleasurable indeed. Thank you

I will always welcome fan suggestions and read them through with an open mind, with that being said I will never make any promises if I feel the suggestions seems too unrealistic or maybe even too hard to write. Your suggestion is by no means bad, however I do feel like it would go against the core value of the story which is secrecy and thrill. Kushina being able to simply remove Naruto’s momories will remove the thrill of being caught and as I stated last time I will try and be more positive when writing Naruto as I already feel like he’s had it rough enough. 

Thank you for your support and interest in the story!

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Guest Kushina is a cheating slut

Could you do kushina having sex with one of minatos friends like hiashi hyuga or better yet fugaku Uchiha it will be very hot and sexy watching kushina suck cock if another man while her husband is sleeping or nearby take that into consideration it is by far a very hot scenario since Naruto is getting a bit of heat minato should now compensate for it 

PS do fugaku Uchiha sasukes dad to have sex with kushina please

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1 hour ago, Guest Kushina is a cheating slut said:

Could you do kushina having sex with one of minatos friends like hiashi hyuga or better yet fugaku Uchiha it will be very hot and sexy watching kushina suck cock if another man while her husband is sleeping or nearby take that into consideration it is by far a very hot scenario since Naruto is getting a bit of heat minato should now compensate for it 

PS do fugaku Uchiha sasukes dad to have sex with kushina please

Well, it will be very possible that Kushina will sleep with older men in the future and maybe even Minato’s friends, but as for Fugaku, never been a fan of him and I have already set up the Uchiha murder with the only survivors in Konoha being Sasuke and Mikoto. I will tend to try and use new oc characters as well as more unknown characters who appears in filler. :unsure:

 

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Guest Kushina uzumaki

Hello lordoflust you are seriously one of the best writers ive seen on adultfanfic you have a masterpiece in the making. I wanted to ask you something will give iruka a chance to have sex with kushina that will be very exciting or even giving Konohamaru and his friends or hiashi some loving as well from kushina

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3 hours ago, Guest Kushina uzumaki said:

Hello lordoflust you are seriously one of the best writers ive seen on adultfanfic you have a masterpiece in the making. I wanted to ask you something will give iruka a chance to have sex with kushina that will be very exciting or even giving Konohamaru and his friends or hiashi some loving as well from kushina

Thank you for your support and interest for the story :)

As it currently stands there is already plans to include both Konohamaru and Udon and give them a bigger presence in the story, there is also chances for Iruka, though nothing is set in stone.

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Guest Itachi Uchiha

I'm curious are you planning to make kushina a fully fledged whore by the end of it all or finally getting her to do bukkake if you don't know what it means search online but I gotta say it will interesting to see kushina doing bukkake by the main cast in a near caught situation

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9 hours ago, Guest Itachi Uchiha said:

I'm curious are you planning to make kushina a fully fledged whore by the end of it all or finally getting her to do bukkake if you don't know what it means search online but I gotta say it will interesting to see kushina doing bukkake by the main cast in a near caught situation

Well I can’t say how Kushina will be by the end of the story, seeing how I pretty much make up every chapter as I begin writing it, but I can say that bukakke is planned multiple times, of course by her students and as well as other future groups.

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