jelad Posted April 12, 2015 Report Posted April 12, 2015 gamascal, I am also reading captious and he has finally caught up with his story. what do you thank of it? Magus, just keep telling your story and we will keep reading it. Quote
that-one-guy Posted April 12, 2015 Report Posted April 12, 2015 Nap turned into full on sleep Did I miss anything good? Quote
magusfang Posted April 12, 2015 Author Report Posted April 12, 2015 Nah...should post tomorrow night, just one more scene to go for this chapter. Keep getting interupted...house full of women, what do ya expect? Quote
magusfang Posted April 13, 2015 Author Report Posted April 13, 2015 Yeah, chapter 60 is up. I think I can close this in one or two chapters...so nearing the end... COJimmyV 1 Quote
Samara Posted April 13, 2015 Report Posted April 13, 2015 gr8 chapter Magus. should I think that you've implied in it that Kara's mom may not be evil. as our previous assumption? by the way I really hope that you'd be able to complete this book within this week. and next week we get to read SITG . (*fingers crossed *) happy writing. Quote
that-one-guy Posted April 13, 2015 Report Posted April 13, 2015 Have to wait a few hours before I can read it, I'll be back B) Quote
COJimmyV Posted April 13, 2015 Report Posted April 13, 2015 (edited) As always, well done! Love the parts with Stacey and Kara but disappointed you didn't describe their reactions to watching Max and Emma since your descriptions in those scenes are always top notch. Really hoping you're going to include that in the next chapter. The rest was kinda heartbreaking but really looking forward to Turner getting his just desserts. Edited April 13, 2015 by COJimmyV Sniper014 1 Quote
magusfang Posted April 13, 2015 Author Report Posted April 13, 2015 As always, well done! Love the parts with Stacey and Kara but disappointed you didn't describe their reactions to watching Max and Emma since your descriptions in those scenes are always top notch. Really hoping you're going to include that in the next chapter. The rest was kinda heartbreaking but really looking forward to Turner getting his just desserts. I already had a couple of sex scenes, besides Kara needs something for her dream sequence ...or not COJimmyV 1 Quote
magusfang Posted April 13, 2015 Author Report Posted April 13, 2015 (edited) angeldust 2015-04-13 id # 3000226128 Actually I think that the next chapter could have used this title as Kara lets into him ala Becca & her father.Good chapter but now that you are winding 'GITG' down we need more details and less sex. So, I actually was conflicted on the title to chapter 60 as well. The chapter doesn't focus on Turner per se but on the evil he's done and the pain he's caused. I had initially thought to call it Echoes. You know that our deeds are the echoes of who we are, they are what linger as we passs through this world. But I thought that was too maudlin (I kno, I know...the whole damn story is laced with morbidity, buy this time I stood fast ) So, since the chapter covers Turners latest sins, I thought I should just name the echo...sort of like a metaphysical personel file Oh and just cause I'm a nice guy, here's a little crumb to tide you over" Girls In The Grass Chapter 61: A Daughter's Love Edited April 13, 2015 by magusfang COJimmyV 1 Quote
angeldust Posted April 13, 2015 Report Posted April 13, 2015 So I guess that will be about Han loving Cat? Echoes would have also worked as it was an echo of Becca's & Suzy's introduction to The family. Now we need a interview with the two legless wonders and Turner. In the case of the mercs you should once again let the girls do the interviews while Rick, Early, Max while Gunny & MSgt. watch on. Let the two mercs recognise Rick and after a brief brave hearted attempt to stand tall the girls show Turner's dungeon casualties implying that's what is instore for them. (They appear to be in that dungeon) For Turner; Karla, Stace, Suzy & Becca are the ones that interview him and he is a true psycho/socio but is not into being on the receiving end. I now think that The Shadow Group is behind all of this to financially support their activities. Quote
magusfang Posted April 13, 2015 Author Report Posted April 13, 2015 The plan is to let Amy and Alice at the mercs while Kara says high to Daddy...should be a lot of fun! COJimmyV and Rescue25 2 Quote
angeldust Posted April 13, 2015 Report Posted April 13, 2015 So, you know Samara will be bugging you now for the next chapter; right? I hereby appoint her your official hound for the next chapter. Let's admit that everybody is anxiously awaiting the great reveal and the shearing of the flock. COJimmyV and Rescue25 2 Quote
magusfang Posted April 13, 2015 Author Report Posted April 13, 2015 I'm writing as fast as I can...please don't whip me anymore Samara :snivel snivel:: Rescue25 and COJimmyV 2 Quote
that-one-guy Posted April 13, 2015 Report Posted April 13, 2015 angeldust 2015-04-13 id # 3000226128 Actually I think that the next chapter could have used this title as Kara lets into him ala Becca & her father. Good chapter but now that you are winding 'GITG' down we need more details and less sex. So, I actually was conflicted on the title to chapter 60 as well. The chapter doesn't focus on Turner per se but on the evil he's done and the pain he's caused. I had initially thought to call it Echoes. You know that our deeds are the echoes of who we are, they are what linger as we passs through this world. But I thought that was too maudlin (I kno, I know...the whole damn story is laced with morbidity, buy this time I stood fast ) So, since the chapter covers Turners latest sins, I thought I should just name the echo...sort of like a metaphysical personel file Oh and just cause I'm a nice guy, here's a little crumb to tide you over" Girls In The Grass Chapter 61: A Daughter's Love Sweet so kara virtually tortures her dad He deserves it! Great chapter and I enjoyed reading it for the most part, I don't think anyone could enjoy the basement scene Eagerly awaiting the next chapter as always Rescue25 1 Quote
Guest gamascal@gmail.com Posted April 13, 2015 Report Posted April 13, 2015 Damn Magus, you are good. Just read the last chapter and concede that you are da bomb! This is a very sick town! Quote
Guest gamascal@gmail.com Posted April 13, 2015 Report Posted April 13, 2015 Damn Magus, you are good. Just read the last chapter and concede that you are da bomb! This is a very sick town! I hope Max squeeze out every drop of information he has in him and make it as painful as possible without killing him. He should leave one of the nanites hidden in him so that he has excruciating pain for the rest of his life, which I hope is not too long. He can die in prison like Wu. Was it Wu or the prosecutor he had left one of the nanites in? Something is wrong with the people in this town.They are EVIL! Quote
magusfang Posted April 13, 2015 Author Report Posted April 13, 2015 The prosecuter got the nanites, Max used the med pod to mess Wu up...he's got a bit of a vindictive streak...kinda like the guy who created him So, the next chapter will be sort of two parrelel stories that I jump back and forth between, with a really mean cliff hanger at the end... Quote
jelad Posted April 13, 2015 Report Posted April 13, 2015 great chapter, it got me really excited for the last chapter (or chapters). What happened to the daughter that wanted Amy to be her mother? Quote
angeldust Posted April 13, 2015 Report Posted April 13, 2015 Jane, is just that Amy, Alice & Max's daughter; now. She was not in this chapter, along with a lot of the children, as she had nothing to do story wise. After the Bugaboo at the Turners House with all the Cops/Emts/Coroners how do they keep it quiet about the scooby gang? I mean the twins ditched the guns when everyone showed up, but Cat performed right along side the Emts and they had to have noticed her expertise. That should be addressed even if only in passing. Quote
magusfang Posted April 13, 2015 Author Report Posted April 13, 2015 great chapter, it got me really excited for the last chapter (or chapters). What happened to the daughter that wanted Amy to be her mother? Jane wasn't in this chapter but she is in the next, she plays a minor role here and there, kinda like Han does Jane, is just that Amy, Alice & Max's daughter; now. She was not in this chapter, along with a lot of the children, as she had nothing to do story wise. After the Bugaboo at the Turners House with all the Cops/Emts/Coroners how do they keep it quiet about the scooby gang? I mean the twins ditched the guns when everyone showed up, but Cat performed right along side the Emts and they had to have noticed her expertise. That should be addressed even if only in passing. Everyone there was one of Early's people so it's still contained...besides who would believ some EMT who said a six year old girl was performing field surgery? Rescue25 and COJimmyV 2 Quote
Guest Christian1040 Posted April 14, 2015 Report Posted April 14, 2015 I would hope Jane plays a bigger role than at the level of Han. Han was only mentioned or seen in this book at most 5 times. I would say she at least be in every other chapter or whenever a family seen is involved like at the end of this chapter where they were all in the bed.She is one of Max's daughters and they all have something special about them. Since Tali and Jazz are expert warriors and Cat is the artist and medical genius, why not give Jane superior coding and hacking abilities. I just think its wrong to include 3 of Max's girls and leave one out. Once you made Jane one of Max's daughter Magus, you made a commitment to do something special with her. Quote
Guest Christian1040 Posted April 14, 2015 Report Posted April 14, 2015 Or since baically everyone in the family has coding and hacking abilities. Maybe have Jane be a technological genius. Like have her design and build deadly weapons and new pieces of technology for raids and such. Quote
COJimmyV Posted April 14, 2015 Report Posted April 14, 2015 Tail, Jazz and Cat having special abilities makes me think Legion might have something to do with it. Rescue25 1 Quote
Guest Christian1040 Posted April 14, 2015 Report Posted April 14, 2015 It was previously stated already that Legion only enhances what is already there. It was in one of the previous chapters,can't remember which one though. Quote
Rescue25 Posted April 14, 2015 Report Posted April 14, 2015 WHAT????? Mangus leave a cliffhanger? He doesn't do something that mean! Does he? Would he? B Quote
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