Keith Inc. Posted March 28, 2008 Report Share Posted March 28, 2008 Fast forward makes me horny. When i was on my first command, my roommate used to rent porn tapes by the back-pack full. He'd copy them for the submarine patrols, loaning them out to anyone that was interested. But while he ran the tapes on two decks to copy them, he'd use a third tape to watch something. And he had no patience for conversations, setting, stripping, lubricating or anything but the actual bumping of uglies. So he'd fast forward. Any time i was in the barracks, no matter what i was doing, from about 1400 to midnight, there were people in the back ground groping each other at 4x speed. They enter the room, bump faces, appear sneeze their clothing off, jump into bed and suddenly there's these closeups of dangling boobies and penetration. Halfway through the cum shot, we're back on 4x, so the sperm shoots out like a staple gun, and there's more jerky movement until someone else is sticking it where the studio lights shine. I never noticed until just recently. My kids are slowly working their way through our DVD collections, stopping now and again for dinner, chores, weapons drill and to taunt the missionaries on the sidewalk. So while i'm surfing the net, they load a disc, get near the scene they stopped watching at, and fast forward to where they left off. And while the characters jerk their way across the space station, the back of my head is suddenly expecting Delenn to sneeze her clothes off and bump her face against Sheridan. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Zyx Posted March 28, 2008 Report Share Posted March 28, 2008 Lol, I had some weird stuff this afternoon which I'd rather not talk about.... My computer broke down a couple of days ago and I can do some stuff on this one but I've sorta gone cold turkey on masturbation. So I became a little to open minded for comfortable retrospect. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shinigamiinochi Posted March 29, 2008 Report Share Posted March 29, 2008 I can absolutely not get off on live action porn, it has to be hentai or nothing doing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greenwizard Posted March 29, 2008 Report Share Posted March 29, 2008 There are lots of weird things about me. Pick one. I once got off on having my toes sucked.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest angelic memories Posted March 29, 2008 Report Share Posted March 29, 2008 I can absolutely not get off on live action porn, it has to be hentai or nothing doing. yeah I'm the same way! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Agaib Posted March 29, 2008 Report Share Posted March 29, 2008 I'm nearly incapable of taking steps one at a time. I must do two at once. I hate stairs with uneven numbers of steps... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bargle5 Posted March 29, 2008 Report Share Posted March 29, 2008 I'm nearly incapable of taking steps one at a time. I must do two at once.I hate stairs with uneven numbers of steps... When going up or down stairs, I have to end on my right foot. If I don't, I'll feel 'off' until I hop on one foot to balance things out. For stairs that I use regualrly, I'll remember which foot to start on to end up on the right at the top/bottom. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarkInuLord Posted April 1, 2008 Report Share Posted April 1, 2008 Anything and everything is weird about me. >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SkyaraSnow Posted April 2, 2008 Report Share Posted April 2, 2008 I twitch in my sleep.....it's Restless Leg Syndrome, but still....I once fell asleep sitting on a couch next to one of my friends....she said I kicked her in the butt three times..... I felt bad after that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Rosemarius Posted April 3, 2008 Report Share Posted April 3, 2008 I get off when I'm not able to do something. When I was like, 12, and not able to find one of my puppets, frustration hit me, and for some reason I had to jerk off to relieve a sudden sexual tension. Same thing when I'm not able to make my pc work, or when I play a videogame and always get killed, or when I push myself hard to do something. I also used to get off imagining someone ripping off all my hard work as a writer (or something I put effort in) in front of my eyes, without being able to do anything to stop it. It's a very weird thing I think. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Zyx Posted April 3, 2008 Report Share Posted April 3, 2008 I get off when I'm not able to do something. When I was like, 12, and not able to find one of my puppets, frustration hit me, and for some reason I had to jerk off to relieve a sudden sexual tension. Same thing when I'm not able to make my pc work, or when I play a videogame and always get killed, or when I push myself hard to do something. I also used to get off imagining someone ripping off all my hard work as a writer (or something I put effort in) in front of my eyes, without being able to do anything to stop it. It's a very weird thing I think. I don't presume to know anything but that sounds like some unfocused submission fetish Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greenwizard Posted April 3, 2008 Report Share Posted April 3, 2008 More like a kid who linked masturbation to stress relief and some wires got crossed. Been there, done that, it's a very hard habbit to break. I guess that's another weird thing about me. I masturbate when I'm playing a game or something and I'm loosing. When my boyfriend is in the room and I can't... I scream obsceneties and kick and throw things. I have a very short and uncontrolable temper when I'm aroused and can't do anything about it. Oh... and cigarette smoke arouses me. I hate it. When my mom would light up around me I wanted to drive a screwdriver through her head... but seing as how that would've gotten me thrown in jail... I went up to my room, turned on a fan, and jerked off instead. Welcome to my fucked up world.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MidnightBliss Posted April 3, 2008 Report Share Posted April 3, 2008 The smell of gasoline, kerosene, and other liquid flammables turns me on. Ever since my computer went down one summer I keep porn on anything that can contain it, PSP's, DVD's, etc. No matter what someone says to me when i pass them in the hall or on the street I say "Hi" in response and keep walking, which may not sound weird but here is an example: Random dude or dudette: Did you see my puppy his name is Wolfenstein and he's been missing for a few days? Me: Hi (walks away) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Zyx Posted April 4, 2008 Report Share Posted April 4, 2008 The smell of gasoline, kerosene, and other liquid flammables turns me on. Ever since my computer went down one summer I keep porn on anything that can contain it, PSP's, DVD's, etc. No matter what someone says to me when i pass them in the hall or on the street I say "Hi" in response and keep walking, which may not sound weird but here is an example:Random dude or dudette: Did you see my puppy his name is Wolfenstein and he's been missing for a few days? Me: Hi (walks away) Lol, that's awesome Though I know this guy who runs around screaming hello at anyone who'll listen That's just goddamned annoying. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hellagoddess Posted April 8, 2008 Report Share Posted April 8, 2008 I can absolutely not get off on live action porn, it has to be hentai or nothing doing. I completely agree - live action just looks...gross. Personally I've never thought people having sex was an attractive sight. I mean, i'm sure it's nice when it's happening, but real people just look more funny than anything. Hentai, however, gets two thumbs up from me Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shinju Posted April 8, 2008 Report Share Posted April 8, 2008 The smell of gasoline, kerosene, and other liquid flammables turns me on. Me 2! Another weird thing that turns me on: New carpet and empty rooms with a vast expanse of clean carpet. No, not what your thinking, I'm talking about actual push flooring. And marbles. I used to play with marbles when I was a kid and sort them out by color and stuff. But about thirty minutes of innocent playing I'd have to leave and go masturbate. I have no idea why. Now, don't laugh, but when I was younger the same thing would happen to me while playing Mario64. Wtf??? Even back then I was like, what the hell is wrong with me? This is like, the most unsexiest game ever! Okay, it is pretty funny, u can laugh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest cuntoid Posted April 12, 2008 Report Share Posted April 12, 2008 Most of the time, I can't get off on anything except written stuff. That's not so weird, but thinking back to some of the written stuff I've gotten off on. -.- Also, I've got this weird color dyslexia thing with green and orange. Sometimes red and blue. I dunno. It's very strange and no matter how much I try to consciously not do it, still do. Call green things orange and ect. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greenwizard Posted April 13, 2008 Report Share Posted April 13, 2008 Everytime I wash my hands my back itches. I just noticed that today. I could go all day without it itching, and the second I put my hands under running water it starts itching like crazy. It also itches when I'm trying to sleep. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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