"... I do question William's reaction to all of this, but I think Red's is pretty realistic. Split parents are pretty hard to deal with, and them getting back together can be just as rough as them splitting.
Which is why I think how Will responds to all of this is important, because I'm not sure if he was ever told he had a big brother before he met Red, but either way, first Red got ploped on his family's door step, this strange kid who shares the same father as him but who he's never met, and now this strange woman shows up, the mother of his brother who was married to his father before his own mother was, and now she's slept with his father. I realize Red is having enough of an outward reaction to all of this for both of them, but I still think Will needs to have some kind of opinion. To be honest in a lot of this story he's seemed more like a prop and less like a character, and we've gotten maybe one instance where there's been real chemistry between him and Red (When he covered for him when he went to Dannie's party), and I'd be interested to see how you bring him more into the story now that the family dynamic is being brought more into the spotlight." - The_Silent_Rose
Ok, Rose (hehe), as always, thank you thank you for being frank and honest, I seriously need people to call me out on stuff, it helps me build the kind of revisions I'm planning once I'm done drafting (which is why I'm not looking for a beta)!
As for Will...William, William, William. Part of my difficulty in handling his character is that I know all things about him that I haven't told you yet in the story, but that I never initially planned for him to have in the first place.
He started out basically (and I think you said this) as a prop. A counterbalance to Red, everything he wasn't, and initally, Red was basically just going to be some bastard child, and James was going to still be married. But then (because I clearly wanted to cultivate a clusterfuck) James' character deepened, and the backstories started falling into place, and I realized at the beginning, both James and Will are flat, and prop characters, and I'm going to change that when I revise.
But for now I am posed the crux problem of contradicting myself, intentionally, in the story. Will is propped up in the beginning as the glorious, spoiled, bratty second son who James loves more, because why would James have emotional attachments to his wives or bastard children when he's a flat portrayal of a total prick. See the problem?
all I can say about Will's backstory and character development is such that I have literally enjoyed his future depth so much that I probably wont even start it in this story. Hint: He'll be getting his own. He is not what he seems, and the initally backstory I posed for him I've mentally scrapped and moved on from.
Suffice to say that Will is going to end up being one hard, sharp-tongued bad-ass motherfucker, (and I have his perfect future counterpart mapped out, too, and you'll meet him soon). And then I will be editing this piece of work down to appropriately reflect those changes. Cool? Cool. I promise, all will make more sense once it comes to light who Will really is and what's he's really like.