FairySlayer
-
Posts
242 -
Joined
-
Last visited
-
Days Won
12
Content Type
Profiles
Forums
Events
Posts posted by FairySlayer
-
-
That's really cool and will save a lot of time and energy. Heck, now I can drop my old board-formatted stories in a dummy post and then copy & paste from the preview.
Thanks you two for making it better all the time.
-
re: 'Letters from "Derpy"'
The smallest things can get us into weird situations we never imagined. Maybe her coltfriend breaking up with her was a big shock, but she's better off without someone like that. Anyway, her new "friends" may not be great, but it must beat being lonely. At least Princess Luna is forcing her to get out of the house and socialize. The forcing part is probably the biggest issue.Okay, now we have an alcoholic mail carrier pony, who thinks everyone is out to get her? Interesting enough. Had me giggling at some of the sign offs! Thanks for sharing, PW
Thanks for checking out this silly tale. Three more letters and it's all done — yay!
-
These are my replies to reviews for 'Letters from "Derpy"' (reviews).
Again, thanks for the kind words, and I'm glad you're enjoying it. Bubbly seems to be doing better for herself, no matter how much she's hating it. The equine cussing / puns are tough sometimes, so I'll try harder.I saw this show for the very first time today and thought of poor Bubbly. These letters are very entertaining, though I do hope the poor filly finds some relief sooner or later!
{...}
"What a dock!!" The equine cursing gets me every time! Poor Bubbly just can't get a break. I almost feel bad for laughing.
There are only a few more to go and all will be revealed!
I think she's a survivor, no matter what thoughts her weakest moment brought. Thanks for commenting.aww, poor Derpy!
-
re: "Moonstruck Down"
I'm glad you got a laugh out of it. Thanks.Bwa ha ha... The way you suddenly change the tone of the dialouge half way through is very funny. I had this totally sappy sparkly pony image in my head, thinking "Yep, white pony, night pony, I guess this is what they do..." which suddenly came to a screeching halt of hilarity. It's the kind of joke that works really well in the shorter set up and wind down - facehoofed is presumably a sharper edged face palm? Inherantly funny word right there!
I had to look up Alicorn in the context of MLP, the non-MLP definition I recall didn't fit
Actually makes it even funnier than the standard ponies to my mental image!(My search led me to someone describing "She is an Alicorn - a pegasus/unicorn combination made from two different ponies" which frankly gives me the idea of a very Dr Frankenstein meets stolen car chop shop operation)...
Princess Celestia is a bit formal, but I may have overdone it; Luna doesn't say much once she's restored, but she was a bit stuck up in her "Nightmare Moon" phase. If just wants to go out and acting like a teenager that's much better than before.Someone else had used the term "alicorn" so I poked around until I found a decent unicorn site to back up Wikipedia's definition: a unicorn's horn primarily but and equine with "all the options" in contemporary writing. At the very beginning of the series they refer to Celestia using "her unicorn powers," so I probably should have used "winged unicorn" too.
Some of the stuff in the three earlier series is downright disturbing, at least from screencaps that have been posted. And don't worry about the facehoof because it's just a pony putting her "palm" on her forehead in a "D'OH!" moment, and maybe shaking her head too.
-
from the archive: "[she] said, grabbing his bowel and fork off the table."
*blinks* Were you reading a fic by JayDee...? Then it would make sense!
Oh, you just cracked me up so hard that I'll be laughing about this all day.
-
These are my replies to reviews for "Moonstruck Down" (reviews), which was written for the week 16 challenge Moon.
How did I know that parents of teenagers would be the first to reply? (It's even in the disclaimer.)
It's good to know that people are still looking at these stories. By now I'd avoid the series, but being able to work in all of the background easily made it irresistible to write. Besides, don't we all wish we could just go have fun while someone else takes care of everything? (I get the impression that you arethat someone else most of the time.)Face hoof! Face hoof! You do know in my reality a face hoof would be a really bad thing, but that is hilarious! Fuck that! I'm going clubbing! Awesome. Grinning ear to ear like the true idiot I am! Thanks for sharing, FS, and nice to see you back!
They never facehoof hard, plus it seems like they don't wear horseshoes on a regular basis. Then again, for the right amount of oats and carrots they may stop by the farrier's on the way to "talk to" anyone who's giving you grief.
Most of all, I'm glad it gave you a smile.
Thanks. Again, I'm glad that it has some general appeal at the very least.Oh, my! Somehow I think Celestia is going to be doing more than facehoofing. On the other hand, I wouldn't mind hanging out with Luna. Marvelous use of the prompt!
Hanging out with a goddess and co-ruler who just wants to have fun would be great.
Celestia is too caring (and guilt-ridden) to get too worked up, but she's also patient enough to let Luna recover at her own pace and in her own way.Actually, I imagine Luna going into Celestia's bedroom to "borrow" one of her saddles (which she'll need to stuff
) and finding her secret diary. After reading "A Prayer for My Sister" she'd run back to Celestia in tears and gladly resume her duties. (Millenniumagers and their mood swings...)Thanks for the comments, ladies. Those are what make writing so much more gratifying.
:hug: -
Pen Name: Fairy Slayer
Story link: Moonstruck Down
Review replies link: in Cartoons > General
Type of story: short Flashfic
Rating: Adult?
Fandom: Cartoon >> My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Pairing: n/a
Warnings: Challenge, Complete, Language, No Sex
-
If I could do it, I'd write stuff out on paper first, in pen. That way I couldn't keep going back and editing myself so much when the words should be streaming out of my brain. Of course I'd scratch words or sections, but in single space it's hard to add a lot. The biggest problem is that even at my fastest writing my hands can't keep up with my brain.
To make it worse, my handwriting is horrible, so slowing down enough so that I could read it later would frustrate me to death. In the end, things go a bit faster with the keyboard even if I get distracted by tweaking as I go. (However, with my luck if I used a notebook I'd lose it and whoever found it would be able to decipher it...)
Still, will use real paper for pre-writing and little notes when ideas pop into my head.
When arranging story point on index cards I use different color Sharpies, but that's mostly for writing comics. (Nothing helps you trim a story like counting the page cards and multiplying by $50.)
(BTW, Pentel R.S.V.P. Fine or Medium are among the few that work for the way I hold pens.)
-
Hahahahah, wow, that was a funny one. I have to say I didn't get it. I mean, if the station is called "Moonbase Alpha," how can they be running out of moon dust? Unless they had been in the moon when it blew up and they were now drifting in space? If that's the case, OUCH, that looks very bad. And highly ironic, too.
Either way, I liked the hilarity and the cliffhanger ending, which worked really well, for a drabble. I can't really comment on much, since anything I might suggest would be outweighed by the unimpeachable word count. One of the disadvantages of these prompts, I suppose. Still, the writing itself was good, managed to convey the setting fairly well (and as usual, I'm sure I'd have got a lot more if I had ever heard of the show, hah!).
Mostly it was meant to be silly, though as I wrote above it could be only something rare in the moon dust... if I wanted it to be technical. Nah.
I suppose I shouldn't be surprised by how few people know about the show. It still has a loyal following, but it was pretty much "Sunday afternoon filler" and was messed with a lot. (One example was that the networks showed them in whatever order they felt like.)
At least I'm glad you got a laugh out of it.
-
Yes, that's what I wrote. I just wanted to make sure you were aware of it, and apparently you already are.
-
Oh, wonderful ending to this! Short, sweet and light on moon dust...perfect. You packed quite a bit into so few words, and I'm positively envious.
Thanks for saying, and for being a bit jealous.
I really wanted to do only a drabble, but the first cleaned up version came out to exactly two hundred words, so what the heck? The idea itself was just floating around in my head from years of trying to think up better "Saturday Night Live" skits than they usually have.How does one run out of moon dust unless there is no more moon to turn into dust?
Never seen or heard of the show, but you managed to include enough in that short story that I was still able to understand the premise!Now I feel really old and geeky, but that's okay. The show was pretty good for the characters and special effects (one of the two highest-budget shows of the 1970s) but a lot of the plots were overburdened trying to tell some "higher message" that was supposed to lift humanity or something.
It was much better when a glowing octopus creature was trying to eat them or something.
Ow, that would reek. Guess they're gonna make for a museum when they all die for some primatives to puzzle over as they pass through another system.Yes, they should spend their last few months writing journals to both leave on the base and beam into space. Better yet, throw in some fanfiction while they're at it.
The title is brilliant. Best title I think I've seen for a while. I don't honestly know why it appeals to me so much, but it does! Fits the story well, but beyond that it's fantastic word play.Sounds like they're screwed, unless maybe they could use the moon dust they have less to make jackhammers and make some more? Presumably the process would be too inefficient though, so they'd still die...
Once in a while I get The Drew Carey Show theme song stuck in my head, "Moon over ..." something. It's an upbeat piece and humorous. It's so common in lyrics that it seemed like a good start to a working title. In my mind, I read it as a song starting then a shrug, a shaking of the head: "Just over." I always make at least a working title because a sucky one inspires me to work harder for a good one. So thanks.
Jackhammers would make sense, or perhaps the tunnel boring machines lying around from when the base was made.
Maybe we could use technobabble to explain that they can only use the 3He (Helium-3, which is a potential fusion fuel) trapped in the moon dust, but this wasn't meant to be serious. (Me, serious? Seriously?)However, as above, there's probably some hyper deistic intelligence which will decide to help them out — but only at the last minute.
-
It appears that if a moderator or administrator creates an "invisible" post and then I "Mark Board As Read" before the post is made visible then that post is already marked as read. The first time it happened I thought that I'd used MBAR at exactly the wrong instant, but it keeps happening. (So this is speculation.
)It probably doesn't affect most users, but I MBAR about once a day so I can easily see what's new. Now that I know I'll just make sure to check the DDADT subforum regularly. I'd just hate to miss any important announcement, etc.
It's not a big deal and I certainly don't expect you to change your procedures, but I wanted you to know that this appears to be the case. (It's not like I've never been wrong.
) -
This started as a lark on 4chan's /co/ board with just her "suicide note" but then it blossomed into something more intriguing. 4chan has a two-thousand character limit per post, which keeps each letter fairly short.
Title: Letter's from "Derpy"
Author: Fairy Slayer
Rating: Adult
Pairings: n/a
Summary: Through her letters, Bubbly Shines deals with the pain caused by one unfortunate photo.
Feedback: I want it, so pony up! (My replies will be in the Cartoon > General subforum.)
Fandom: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
URL: http://cartoon.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600092923
Hay, thanks for beingneighborly enough to read this plug,Fairy Slayer -
Pen Name: Fairy Slayer
Story link: Moon Over... Just Over
Review replies link: in Television > General
Type of story: Flashfic
Rating: Adult
Fandom: Space: 1999 - TV > Misc > General
Pairing: n/a
Warnings: Challenge, Complete / Oneshot, No Sex
-
re: "Yule Regret This"
I've been trying harder to stick with the iconic shows, especially for cartoons. I've been dying to use "Ben 10 (etc.)" but it's not something most folks here would be familiar with, or at least that's my guess. As for Shaggy, it's about time maybe he just got tired of being chased.Roaring fires - just the thing to dispose of an inconveniant corpse when Scooby's already too full to eat it. The line "A tree that cuts down people?" made me laugh out loud, although I figured they ought to think themselves lucky it wasn't the tree from the first Evil Dead movie... Plus, with a Pine costume you can claim a hypothetical 2nd score on the Evergreen prompt
Fred and Daphne: The obvious couple while everyone else was exploring. How Daphne wasn't pregnant five cases in is a Mystery the Mystery Machine couldn't explain as Fred didn't seem the condom buying type... It is brief, but it sure does fit.
Shaggy's gun did seem a little unexpected, but is more realistic, especially for a scared American
Good one and you'd probably have to go a long way to find someone who didn't know Scooby and friends
Daphne is from an upper crust family, so I'm sure she's at least on the pill to avoid any scandal or whatnot. There's even a chance that she won't go all the way yet, but being in such close contact and having a bond already makes that unlikely.
One thing that I should have done differently is letting Shaggy find the bread but look for the knife; when the tree monster follows them into the walk-in he'd see the tinsel glittering and assume it's a knife. Also, if I'd had a few words to spare, Snydington may have said that he expected them to pretend to be tree doctors or beauticians like they always do.
I've only heard a little about the Evil Dead tree, but it sounds like a much sexier way to go (for the viewer, not the victim).
Second score on Evergreen, eh? Maybe it would be fun to "build up" these challenge stories by including or alluding to previous ones. That's a stretch though.
Thanks for reading and for the comments.
-
re: "It's the Wrought That Counts"
The show is too cute not to have a few fanfics. It's also almost too cute to do anything pornographic with.aww!
Almost.
-
These are replies for my yet-again-murderous week 11 (Yule) entry, "Yule Regret This" (reviews)
The only Scooby Doo character I'd ever kill — and want so very badly to kill — is Scrappy Doo. As for the errors, I was in a rush to get it done and posted before the muse left me. (All day I've been struggling to pick up the thing I was working on before.)2010-12-22 id # 3000037296
Ah, what a twist! They killed the fake monster before he could say his overused line. XD I came into this story thinking you were going to kill one of the gang. @_@
I noticed a few minor errors, but overall, your story had a good flow to it. Nice job.
Thanks for the note.
The idea of Shaggy shooting a ghost has been rolling around in my mind for years. Seriously, if they're really ghosts then bullets should go right through them, right? From now on they should immediately hand out the shotguns whenever they go to investigate a mystery. The hauntings will mysteriously stop instantly!2010-12-22 id # 3000037297
Oh, this was wonderful! I absolutely loved the solution to disposing of the monster...something I would have done myself! However, I find myself craving a sandwich and a roaring fire to eat it by...
Yeah, I need a good sandwich too, and I don't think I've been near a fireplace in years. Maybe I'll get a sub and light some candles at home tonight. (Eggnog and rum sound pretty good to me right now too.
)
As far as I know, there's no law against killing a tree (that's not on city property), and how was Shaggy supposed to know? (... besides the fact that he's helped solved hundreds of other phony hauntings and monster sightings in the past ...2010-12-22 id # 3000037298
Hahahahahaha, wow, this was just hilarity piled upon hilarity! The fact that it should have been horribly disturbing but actually wasn't (at least to me) only compounds the fun. The build up to the climax really felt like the cartoon, you have some excellent attention to detail and the "show off the research" attitude is very obvious. Very nice build up with zaniness and an excellent conclusion. It also really shows how thick the group is, how they're all willing to cover for each other.
I'd critique only the single typo I found "than" should be "that" in the sandwich description of the fake ghosts, and the fact that we see very little focus on Scooby Doo when the "Yule log" conclusion plays out. Loved the "rotten pine" comment, though. All in all, an excellent job! Very true to the series!
) The show is so firmly etched in my brain that it's impossible not to have the research all there.I think they'd be an extremely tight bunch no matter what. There's a lot of trust there, though now that Freddy knows that Shaggy has a gun he may listen harder when Shaggy says he doesn't want to split up while searching.
Yes, the Rushing Monster (looks like an alligator) was on my ass, so stuff slipped. I'll fix it eventually. And yes, I should have included Fred and especially Scooby in the final scene somehow. Maybe the scared dog would be consoled with a freshly roasted meat of some kind, still on the bone.
Scooby-dooby... ruh, rhatever.
Of course "the butler did it," and what are butlers if not a little uptight? The wife would have been a good "surprise," but I figured the less overall intrigue the better.2010-12-22 id # 3000037299
Snydington -- nice word play.
"Definitely not the best Yule log," LOVED it!
What a great Yule gift!
Thanks for sharing. PW
At least none of them had a problem letting some weird looking teens wander unattended all over their property and with full access to their most valued possessions. It would have messed up the story otherwise, but that's something any of us would do, right?
He probably won an eating contest. His opponent who didn't have enough cash to cover the bet and gave him the Colt instead. (By the way, why would I choose a Colt over a Smith & Wesson or some other brand, hmm?2010-12-22 id # 3000037300
When did Shaggy start carrying a gun and what idiot was silly enough to approve him for one? LOL!!!! Killer Christmas tree's and nasty yule logs... I love it! Great characterization of the gang as well!
(Note: Today's Captcha is 'Dendoy onk' which totally sounds like a Scooby-ism)
) As for killing trees, the toughest enemies in Sailor Moon, besides the evil queens, were the tree-based monsters. And isn't there some world-domination cult calling itself the National Arbor Day Foundation or something? EEEVILLLE!The first kill is always the hardest, but one way or another they'll never need to make complicated traps again. "I AM THE DOM GHOST! GET OUT! WOOooOOOooO-Oh EFFIN' A! I give up! Don't shoot! You can have the treasure!"
That's a great Captcha. I remember the one I got posting the first time on The Archive was something amazing too, but I'll have to look it up when I get home.
Thanks again everyone.
By the way, did you know that Velma was on the cover of Skeptic magazine last year? -
Pen Name: Fairy Slayer
Story link: Yule Regret This
Review replies link: in Cartoons > General subforum
Type of story: Flashfic
Rating: Adult+
Fandom: Cartoon >> Scooby Doo
Pairing: (barely) Daphne/Freddie
Warnings: Challenge, Complete/One-shot, Death, No Sex, Violence
-
re: "It's the Wrought That Counts"
Thanks. I'm still a bit surprised that this many people liked the story, especially being a children's show (though you wouldn't know that by looking at 4chan's /co/ lately). At this rate I may write only cute stories from now on... or maybe not.I used to LOVE My Little Pony!! This was so cute!
By the way, if you happen to see any of the new series, the "My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic" version, then let me know what you think of the differences. (But don't go out of your way just for me.)
(... do it for the ponies.
) -
For ShadowKnight's wonderfully detailed review of "Cakewalk on the Catwalk":
First off, I truly appreciate you going so far out of your normal domain to critique the four-way when I begged asked. I know that you were busy enough at the time, and that was before you were made Árbitro supremo de Fanfiction español.
Yes, I do aim for a good visual experience with any intricate scene (especially a four-way) and even with stories themselves. It is limiting. Being from a cartoon-focused world that seemed like the ideal, but lately I've been having doubts. (The 'Dick-in-Jane' cartoon lemons get an outrageous number of ratings and comments.) I do try to delve into characters' feelings but perhaps still too much from the outside. Actually, in this story I made a point to stick with one character's viewpoint in each scene, like you mentioned, and there is even a hierarchy of who is the focus in any scene (with a Strawberry on top). In a few cases "I had to" shift to include important details. Maybe that could be called "zooming in," which goes back to the highly-visual aspect.
I pick out issues with my previous stories and put extra effort into avoiding them in the current projects, and overcompensation ensues. It's a bit like trying to get a frilly (subjectively) edged bedspread perfectly even on the bed: every time you pull on one part all of the other edges move, so you have to step back and look again to see how well you did. Wordiness and rambling has been a big problem with several past stories (pre-lemon mostly), and I've wasted a lot of time writing epic pornographic tales that had too many side-stories or plain overkill.
So I can cop to it being over-rehearsed with how "everything being too clear" in the sex and other scenes. Usually I'd like to include more awkwardness and mistakes in young love, or even with adults, but tight got the better of me this time. I can't claim it was just for this chapter, either, because the earlier encounter between Strawberry and Ginger happened rather easily too. Of course I can find ways to rationalize these flaws away
, but it is what it is.I'm not quite obsessed with word count, but I watch page count like a hawk. The big difference is that short paragraphs, whether light dialogue or actions, get the same leading as longer ones.
One big alligator on my ass is that my stories and style always seem to be in the same narrative voice. I'd hoped my first first-person story (the Ruby Gloom one) would help knock me out of the habit (and talk about seeing through a single character's experiences!), though I hadn't finished that story before tapping this one out. Actually, after seeing a few episodes of the DiC "Strawberry Shortcake" (at my co-beta's enticement) this story forced itself to be tapped out within a couple of weeks. However, I did enforce my mandatory "freeze" periods so it certainly wasn't rushed... another thing you mentioned. (So still, no excuses for me!)
Also, I'm a bit too conservative when it comes to being messy and even "poetic" as you mention. Directing is one of my biggest fantasies (which means juggling lots of details; see "zooming in" above) and my biggest hobby is reviewing artwork (analyzing composition, technique, and especially meaning). Clarity is important in both, but there must be room for consumers' own interpretations too. When creating that last part is tough for me, so you're spot on that loosening up would be better. (Just so you know, I often cringe when I force myself to write lay instead of lie — this may be a long row to hoe for me.
)And you got a good triple with that "cheesecake" simile, you silly person you!
So on the whole your review pointed out that I'm still having a lot of trouble with both things that I've already been trying to fix and and overcompensating for past sins. One bright side is that you didn't find any new severe flaws (unless they're buried by the other stuff!). Even better, your encouragement makes me feel freer to color outside the lines and loosen up things a bit. (I almost wrote "gives me license to" but that would be too stiff, right?)
Maybe I'll start with a first-person My Little Pony: FiM story from Pinkie Pie's point of view! (
That MLP:FiM horror story I'm pondering could become absolutely hilarious if I could pull it off that way.)Again, I appreciate the tremendous energy you put into this. It's clear to me that you read the chapter carefully and made sure you truly understood it before starting on that great review. So, in tribute to your comments, I won't spend way too much time tweaking and re-writing this reply either. ("Yeah, that's the ticket!"
)P.S. When it comes to the cute versus sexy comment, I like to quote a good friend: "Cute is just the first stage of sexy." That's not always the case, sure, but it sounds good.
-
You mean something dark... Like this?
I just saw that about an hour ago and had to laugh. Believe it or not, the premiere of MLP:FiM did have a similar power struggle.
Anyway, a friend likes to post "gloomdark" snippets on Fortune 4chan, so on Saturday I threw together a page of notes for something truly horrific. (Perhaps not quite on par with your abilities.) Then again, I'll give it a few days before deciding whether the idea is worth pursuing.
-
These are replies for my week 10 challenge (Gifts) entry, "It's the Wrought That Counts" (story) - (reviews).
Thanks for reading an MLP story, first of all, and then for the kind words of appreciation. As a kid I'd have disagreed about the books-as-gifts idea, but even then I remember getting some that I loved.Silly ponies... books are the BEST gifts! And how sweet of Spike to get so overwrought... the best gift of all!
I'll confess, Spike might have been a teensy bit out-of-character, even if it was off-stage. He gets ticked off every so often but they know he'd never actually hurt any of them. The fillies certainly felt guilty enough after Twilight Sparkle bolted, so he probably didn't need to say much. Sure, I tried to imply a few things, but since the viewpoint is only on TS we'll never know exactly what.
Ain't I a stinker?
From your review it seems like you've seen an episode or two of the show, hmm? — or maybe I'm reading way too much into it.Awwwww, all WAFF from you too? What has come over the AFF crowd this week? Some sort of spirit no doubt! I loved the way Spike was the protagonist! And the book titles were PERFECT! Great job dear, and as always, thanks for sharing! PW
Anyway, I tried to keep close to the show's premise and include "a lesson." Basically it's an "abbreviated Act III" and bound to be a bit mushy. And, yes, I wanted a good ending for all of them, especially on Christmas eve.I'm wishing the same for everyone IRL too.
Hay, er, Hey, I greatly appreciate that you were willing to read it. (Maybe you saw my disclaimer?I, uh, I never thought I'd read a My Little Pony fanfiction. It was weird enough reading the Something Positive strips with the evil queen pony. Glad I did though because those book titles were pretty great - some of them sound like things I'd want to read. "Spooky Tales of Spontaneous Meteorology" in particular could be a NY Times bestseller
So far as the plot, it was pretty cool how she got back and they liked the gifts. Happy ending! I suspect there's even more humor in the choice of titles for people familiar with the characters?
) I knew picking MLP:FiM for the prompt would be risky, but I did aim for accessibility with this tale. Still, I'm a bit squeee! by the number of reviews.You're right that the titles are tied to the characters' personalities, in line with Twilight Sparkle's efforts when finding the books. (So of course they'd have to like them!) The only joke one though was about "The Bronian Empire" — "Bronies" are adult fans who rave about the show on 4chan — excitable people sort of like Pinkie Pie herself.
Spooky Tales of Spontaneous Meteorology was a little different because Rainbow Dash is an impulsive adrenaline junkie, so it had to be something very stimulating: In Equestria the weather is directly controlled by pegasi, so she's freaked out by The Everfree Forest because the weather runs by itself there. (The hungry manticores, sea serpents, etc. are other good reasons to be afraid of it too.)
I hope that isn't too much detail.
Well, I can hardly resist using a tweest (twist) in my stories, but using two is something I'd usually eschew. The part about them actually liking the books was in keeping with the show itself... plus Pittwitch was spot on that I craved wanted some warm and fuzzy feelings for all of them too.Hah, what a sweet story. I think you're very good with characterization and plot, especially since readers utterly unfamiliar with the cartoon (such as me) can still get a pretty good idea of the characters' personalities. I particularly enjoyed the ending, since it was a very unexpected twist. And the extra twist at the very last line, which stated that yes, the books were interesting after all. The distress was very well portrayed and there were a lot of nifty details thrown in. I am very pleased by how the story flows. It's very easy to get lost in it and just read it all the way to the end in one go.
Using the titles was actually a great help for describing their personalities without having to give them more dialogue or action; and I always give light physical descriptions to help readers who aren't familiar with the fandom. (Yes, the visual thing — I just saw your other review.) When I finished the first draft I was worried the long titles and descriptions would put the story well over the limit, but I was close to a hundred under. Phew!
I'm very glad you found it easy to read in one shot, and I'm guessing (hoping) without having to use Wikipedia. There were one of two reservations I had about the flow, but I'm certainly not going to point those out now.
More importantly, it sounds like you enjoyed it.
Deep down I knew you'd read it.Aw! It's cute!!! And I love the twist, that they just didn't wanna make the dragon upset! *giggles*
After the last couple of prompt stories I've written, plus with the holidays here, I wanted to write something uplifting. And how could anyone write something dark about the adorable ponies?* Thanks for the comments, and I hope you get your own baby dragon for Christmas.
Everyone, thanks for taking the time to read and review.
* We'll see... For better or worse, we'll see. MWUHAHAHAHAHA!
Bibliography
(With attempted jokes for those familiar with the series.)
- The Age of Equestrian Unreason, by Specs Love
- Fashion! A Horsetorical Perspective, by Luxury Just
- Spooky Tales of Spontaneous Meteorology, by Withers Chanél
- Ertiveness: Assertiveness Without Being an Ass, by Cotton Tuyu
-
Best Bashes of the Bronian Empire, by Fortune Lurker
- Agriculture and Societal Advancement, by City Planter
- Alexandrite to Zinc Ferrite, by Crystal Sport
-
Fairy Slayer: ... I hadn't thought about his fear over losing the friendship, but you know it really makes sense too.
The thought struck me at the last moment, but maybe I just think too much like a man (or think too much about what a man feels, besides boobies.
) Most of "my job" on the art side is, as I say, "reading way too much into it." At least I'm always tickled when other people find meanings in my stories that never crossed my mind but made sense. Perhaps our gut feelings slip little ideas into our brains when we're not paying attention. -
Pen Name: Fairy Slayer
Story link: It's the Wrought That Counts
Review replies link: Cartoon > General sub-forum
Type of story: Flashfic
Rating: General Audiences (but never let kiddies read directly from the site, m'kay?)
Fandom: Cartoon >> My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Pairing: N/A
Warnings: Challenge, Complete / Oneshot, No Sex
Fairy Slayer's Replies to Your Much-Appreciated Reviews
in General
Posted · Edited by FairySlayer
re: 'Letters from "Derpy"'
Thanks. I'm happy the twist went over all right even after "her" language tried to straddle the line between ambiguous and implying some bad stuff happening. For the names it took a while of going through the basic (opposite) traits and then digging through synonyms or others which were closer or even better.She just needs to write one more letter and then, phew! the series will be finished. It was never supposed to be more than the first letter itself, but after posting it on 4chan I felt like the character deserved something better. Besides, without "Derpy" all of the Bronies wouldn't be bouncing with glee today after she was cross-eyed and clumsy in the new episode (for all of 1½ seconds).