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LadyXandra

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  1. Okay, I didn't know I needed it for each chapter. Just re-edited it. Thanks.
  2. I fixed it like they asked, but I still got an email today saying that I didn't fix it and that they hid my story! I added what they wanted at the end of the very first chapter!
  3. i got a moderator review on one of my stories, saying that I cited from a separate source, but I am not sure what they mean by that. I read the corresponding faq on citations, but I the review was so vague I don't know what they think needs citing. Here is my story: http://games.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600089316 And here is the review: http://games.adult-fanfiction.org/review.php?set=read&no=600089316 Can a moderator help me understand better what needs changing? I get that citations are needed for things taken from other sources, but I don't know what they think needs citing.
  4. Any sort of research, training, school, or learning facility. Transitionary, mid-level, and developmental. Do any of these work?
  5. I know the term "scullery maid" is an English term denoting a person of a lower class or poor, and has a stereotypically harsh accent. Is there an equivalent for French? Is there a video out there that would help me to understand and better write about it? I'm trying to decribe a harsh French accent from the mid 18th century France of a servant girl.
  6. Thank you all for reading. This is a final note detailing further information that you may be interested in. First of all, yes, I am writing a second book. It is under the working title "Obsessions of Fate", and follows directly where the first one left off. You may have noticed that I changed the title of this book as well, and for the time being this will be referred to as my "Fate" series. Second, I highly suggest you join the Facebook group that I have started for my series. You can find it here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/299947797970/ There you will find concept images, inside information on the series, and music videos that I feel fit the story, as well as an exclusive edit of the the first book with added dialogue and information that is *ONLY* available through the group. I also will be uploading the chapters for the sequel book, Obsessions of Fate, there as well as here on AFF. You can find "Obsessions of Fate" here: http://original.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600107507 In the new year, I will be removing this story (I renamed it Fires of Fate, and it will be book 1 in the series) from AFF and publishing it through Amazon. Thanks again for reading everyone! And keep a look out for the sequel which should be up soon! <3
  7. I'm looking for a beta for my novel, Desire Never Dies. It is a vampire action/romance novel that revolved around a vampire by the name of Kieran as he battles the monster that he had become after losing his first wife centuries prior. In the novel he meets a woman named Lilith who looks just like his previous wife and instantly falls for her. However, there is more at work here when a mysterious cult calling themselves the "Fires of Purity" begans killing vampires and non humans enmasse and sets their sight on not just Kieran, but Lilith. In his quest to save Lilith, Kieran battles his inner nature and the beast he had become, as well as the creatures that the Family - the trio leading the cult - send after him. What I am looking for is for someone to read over the text, catch misspellings and missing words (I tend to forget words sometimes), and check it for over all consistency. I'm fairly happy with the way the story is itself, and really am only interested in changing aspects of it if it conflicts with consistency. My novel's tags are: Angst, M/F, Violence, MC, OC, H/C, Oral, MiCD, Fingering, MCD, Rape, Tort, Inc, Abuse, Anal, CR, HJ, WAFF It does contain sex, but I try to keep it "classy", and except for one scene near the end, the rape scenes are glossed over. There is gore, violence, fight scenes, and even zombie like creatures in it, so there is also a horror aspect to my novel as well. My story is also gay friendly, having gay characters shown in a positive light, although there is no sexual content involving the gay characters. The longer description that I use for my novel is as follows: Torn between the past and present, between monster and man, an ancient vampire must fight against not only the evil inside of him, but a rising evil that threatens the only hope he has left of salvation. This isn't your typical vampire romance story. Desire Never Dies is about the vampire Kieran and the only two women he has ever loved. Separated by centuries, Syeria and Lilith may look a like, but they are two very different people trapped in a deadly game based on revenge, fear, and old legends made real. Kieran is a vampire who has lost everything, and has surrendered to the beast within him. Once a man who took pride in caring for others, that all changed the night he lost the woman he loved most. Since then, he had laid a swath of death and revenge on all humans he comes across for centuries. Now old enemies return to finish what they started years ago, and Kieran is placed in a fight against something neither human nor vampire to save a woman who has against all odds rekindled the man within the monster. Will he lose the woman he loves most for a second time to the fires of fate? The story itself can be found here: http://original.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600107368&chapter=1 It is 37 chapters long, with a prologue and epilogue, making it 39. It has over 200,000 words. Please let me know if you're interested.
  8. LadyXandra

    Beta

    I've written a vampire action/romance original novel and I am in need of a beta. It's got gore, violence, and classy smut. Elements of horror, rape and character death, too. Would you be interested?
  9. The thing is, I'm almost done the book by the time this happens. The woman in question is a supporting character in the book, with not that many scenes. Her being confronted by her previous master - who is my book's main vilian, but for different reasons - was a plot twist I added in at very nearly the last few minutes of the book. I plan on expanding on her story and following where this plot twist goes in a later book. I do admit that there is very little in the way of foreshadowing her trauma leading up to the confrontation, but that is what I think adds to the mystery of it all. Basically the woman (Isabella) is a friend the hero's - the main male protagonist - and very close to end of the book, she is searching a mansion where the hero has gone earlier, trying to help him. The antagonist (Edward) of the whole book is on his way of the final escape, when he sees Isabella,recognizes her, and uses his power over her to aid in his escape, taking her along with him. Isabella *could* fight him off, but because of her past history with him and the sudden shock of him being there and holding a gun to her throat (which my character could defend against had she the will do to so) throws her into a trigger where she becomes helpless to refuse him, like she was trained do as a child and teen while being a slave to him. The whole event is supposed to act as a suprise and an almost-to-end final plot twist that will lead into further books and stories.
  10. Thank you so much for the responses everyone. I was told that how I handled a character that I created suddenly becoming passive and not fighting back to "character destroying" because of what little character development I had given the woman shown her to be a strong, capable woman. When I threw in a plot twist of her former master coming up behind her and holding a gun to her neck, although technically she could have easily fought back and might have even won if not escaped, she froze and did as he commanded of her. It was a bit disheartening to hear that criticism because it doesn't make sense to me from what I know of PTSD and abused women. I thought the plot twist added another facet to her personality, not "destroyed" it. Your responses have made me feel better about my choice in the direction in which I moving her character. Thank you both so much.
  11. Trigger warning for abused people: I got no idea where else to ask this, so bear with me: Hypothetical senario: A women escapes after being systematically abused for years as a sex slave to a particular "master" Learns self defense and how to properly defend herself If she is then put into a vulnerable position with her former abuser, is it possible for the women to mentally revert back to her abused self, foregoing any attempt at fighting back? A woman who comes off as strong and capable, but a hidden past of being abused, is suprised by her former abuser and suddenly can't fight back and reverts mentally back to her abused self. Is this probably/likely? From what I understand yes, but I want confirmation besides my own understanding. This is for a character that I am writing.
  12. Just added chapter 21 (22 with the prologue)! Please read and review! The tags have also been updated: Angst, M/F, Violence, MC, OC, H/C, Oral, MiCD, WIP, Fingering, MCD, Rape, Tort, Inc, Abuse, Anal, CR, HJ, WAFF Also, here is what I'd like to add to the story summery if I had the space: Torn between the past and present, between monster and man, an ancient vampire must fight against not only the evil inside of him, but a rising evil that threatens the only hope he has left of salvation. This isn't your typical vampire romance story. Desire Never Dies is about the vampire Kieran and the only two women he has ever loved. Separated by centuries, Syeria and Lilith may look a like, but they are two very different people trapped in a deadly game based on revenge, fear, and old legends made real. Kieran is a vampire who has lost everything, and has surrendered to the beast within him. Once a man who took pride in caring for others, that all changed the night he lost the woman he loved most. Since then, he had laid a swath of death and revenge on all humans he comes across for centuries. Now old enemies return to finish what they started years ago, and Kieran is placed in a fight against something neither human nor vampire to save a woman who has against all odds rekindled the man within the monster. Will he lose the woman he loves most for a second time to the fires of fate?
  13. Hi there, I'm rewriting one of my older stories, all original content. I would be very excited if you were take a look and leave a review, telling me what you think. It's fully OC, with two main love interests for the main male protagonist. It does jump a bit between past and present, but I've tried to keep it clear and without confusion. This is the first in at least two fully written (although still needed to be revised and edited) stories that I am putting up. The second one is direct sequel and will be added after I am done with this one. This book primarily deals mostly with vampires and humans, but there are other species at least mentioned as of yet. Lots of angst, lemon goodness, and plot twists and turns. I am also a very big fan of cliff hangers. Author: Lady Xandra Title: Desire Never Dies Summary: Torn between the past and present, between monster and man, an ancient vampire must fight against not only the evil inside of him, but a rising evil that threatens the only hope he has left of salvation Feedback: Very much appreciated! Pairing: All OC Fandom: Original Warnings: Angst,M/F,OC,Violence,MC,OC,H/C,Oral,MiCD,WIP, Fingering,HJ with more tags added as the story progresses Solo story or chaptered story: Chaptered URL: http://original.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600107368
  14. What about a long fic (over six chapters) that has each of the 100 words included in it? Each word would have a meaningful point in the story, and repeated as many times as possible. Kinda like this, I suppose: (Male OC)- Oohh, I like your chocolate covered nails digging into my back. (Female OC Werewolf) - *Growl* You would like them more if I dug them into your hard butt(/or ass), wouldn't you? (2nd Female OC)- What about me? I'd love to suck his hard cock, watching as my black lipstick covers his entire, huge, length! Anyway, just a thought...
  15. Hey there, people! This is my first time on the forum, so hopefully I do this right! I'm here to promote all four pieces of my work that I have uploaded onto the site. One of them is a lengthy book, and I also have completed the second in the series, if anyone is interested! Anyway, here we go... Title #1: Desire Never Dies. Author: Anuksuma Summary: A story about an old vampire who learns that love is not necessarily only just once in a lifetime. Rating: Adult+ For minor(little, not child) sex scenes, as well as violence and blood/gore. Pairings: OC(M)/OC(F) - Vampire/Human. Spoilers: Many unexpected twists, well suiting for a vampire romance novel. Feedback: Please, Please, Please! This is my first full-length story that I have written in years, and I would like to know what people think before I post the sequel. Even critizisms or flames, as long as it's not just "you suck". URL: http://original.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600098044 Title #2: Strangers in the Night. Author: Anuksuma Summary: About two people who meet one night in the bar, and spend a hot and sexy night together. Rating: Adult++ For Mature sex scenes, language, and graphic descriptions. Pairings: OC/OC - M/F. Spoilers: Nothing really... Sex! Feedback: If you want, I would really like to hear what you think. URL: http://original.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600098114 Title #3: We Call You - A work of poetry. Author: Anuksuma Summary: A M/F couple seeks out a missing love(F). Written as a calling spell. Rating: Adult For Death and Adult themes. Pairings: OC/OC/OC - M/F/F. Spoilers: A hint is it involves past lives... Feedback: If you want, I would really like to hear what you think. URL: http://original.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600098289 Title #4: Darkness. Author: Anuksuma Summary: (FanFiction of Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic)LSFExile copes and deals with how the Force has affected her. Behind the scenes, the story continues on... Rating: Adult++ For Adult themes. graphic sex, language, other stuff yet to be decided in later chapters. Pairings: Multiple Pairings, LSFExile/Bao-Dur main pairing. Spoilers: The Light Side of the Force is what is good in Universe. Love is good, isn't it? What if you felt love for all those that you held close to you? Feedback: I would really appreciate it. This is my first real FanFiction, so please tell me what you think! URL: http://games.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600083279 So yeah, those are my four works that I have so far put up. Remember, I also have the sequel to Desire Never Dies (#1 above) all ready complete. I would just to know if anyone liked the first one! So please, please, please leave a review for any of the above if you have the time. Even if you haven't read the particular story all the way through, it would still help. Anyway, thanks so much for even reading this! After all, where would stories and their author's be if it wasn't for readers like you!!! Kisses and Peace Blessed Be
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