Job hire personality tests

[Keith Inc.]

I was reading a discussion in another forum about failing the personality test that was part of an employment process.

I think my office should use personality tests. A significant portion of the work force has military experience. We're starting to get new-hires who grew up in the esteem-friendly school system. It's not a good match.

Maybe some basic 'this is to look forward to' questions?

"If a new-hire at a military contractor firm violates national security, do you think it's appropriate for an employer to threaten their job? Their health? Their life?"

"Do you have a problem with profanity used in the workplace to express anger? To underscore priority? As a comma?"

"Which do you consider more important for job satisfaction:

a. Getting a job done.

b. Getting a job done without breaking any laws.

c. Getting a job done without your boss finding out about the breaking of any laws.

d. Getting a job done without the customer finding out about the breaking of any laws."

"What do you consider to be the minimum amount of advance warning for business travel involving a change in time zones? Express your answer in minutes or hours. If your hiring interviewer promised you zero business travel from the home, you may use days."

"Do you think that value is added to an exit interview by actually naming names and threatening lawsuits?"

"Would you participate in an office pool to guess the date of the nervous breakdown of a coworker? Of a boss? Of your own breakdown?"

"Which term would you say does NOT describe a new-hire who thinks an education is equal or superior to experience:

a. Fresh meat.

b. Fair game.

c. The Human Dartboard."

[Psychostorm]

When I was living in San Diego I had to fill out one of those for just about every job I applied for. It was a pain.

[foeofthelance]

Hell Keith, where do you work? I could pass that test, if I think the answers are what I think they're supposed to be.

1) Threaten their life. If they risk other people's lives, they should be willing to risk theirs.

2) Why the fuck should I care if some fucker wants to fucking swear all the time? As long as it doesn't interfere with me getting my fucking work done!

3) Getting the job done.

4) 15 minutes booking, plus lead time to the airport.

5) Not really. I want a good recommendation!

6) Sure. $100 says it takes me three months to crack!

7) Trick question. All of the above are an accurate description.

Hell, that was easier than the one I had to take for Waldenbooks. (How the frak am I supposed to know what the average office employee steals in office supplies per quarter?) So, am I hired? XD

[Keith Inc.]

3) Getting the job done.

OOoh! Soooooo close. No, see, some of our work? Doing it wrong is literally a federal case. It's hard to meet budget if we have to remove all the computers and printers from a division because of classified material incorrectly handled. So it's 'without the customer finding out about the breaking of any laws'

Hell, that was easier than the one I had to take for Waldenbooks. (How the frak am I supposed to know what the average office employee steals in office supplies per quarter?) So, am I hired?

I'd hire you. Although that was just meant as a sample... Know anything about automated instructional materials software? Ever been in a Turkish Prison?

[foeofthelance]

Alas, no, and again, no. But I could be coffee boy!