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Posted

This game is simple. Pretend you are giving a toddler a completely fake talk about "the birds and the bees"

For example: Mommy said I was born under a cabbage leaf and the stork picked me out and brought me to their door step in a bassinet.

Posted

My mom made up this weird story about boys sticking their penises into girls private parts and babies falling out...

Posted

*Child*

#Father#

~Mother~

'Thoughts'

"Speaking"

*"Dada where do babies come from?"*

#'Oh shit, fuck, and damnation... how the hell do I amswer THAT'#

*"Dada... did you hear me?"*

#"Yes dear, I was just thinking... I don't know where they come from.... but I bet mommy knows!"#

*"OK"*

#Happily watches toddler run off to unsuspecting wife# (Can we say dog house? Yes we can!)

*"Mama, Dada said you knew where babies come from."*

~'Note to self, kill husband... or maybe trade him in for a cat.'~

*"Mama..."*

~"Well dear... you see...ummm"~

*'I wonder why Mama is muttering about cats and Dada.'*

~"Yes that's it, there is a special seed that only Mommies can buy at the store."~

*"A seed? Can I get one?"*

~"Not until you are much much older dear."~

*"Nessa has 2 daddies... is there a Daddy seed as well?"*

~'Oh how I wish there was!' "I don't know dear."~

*"Why don't you know?"*

~"Because only daddies know about that. You should go ask Dada" 'Ha take that you evil husband!'~

(And now I am running away)

Guest Monsterking
Posted

Remember The Calvin And Hobbes Strip Where Calvins Dad told Calvin That He Was From Sears? That Was An Classic :)

Posted

Remember how you never post on topic??? that wasn't that awesome...

Babies come from the microwaved remains of liposuction

Posted

Babies come forth from the shadows when the screams of dying days are to be heard.

Posted
Babies come forth from the shadows when the screams of dying days are to be heard.

Interesting! I'm inclined to agree! lol

Babies come from the used baby lot. New ones are impossible to come by but exchanges are common, especially with the unruly toddler types!

Posted

when two babies love each other very much they can make an adult together, the adult will then grow up to be a baby and have it's own adults :samurai:

Posted

when two potatoes hate eachother very much, they round up some other potatoes and go to war. they build babies as weapons.

Posted

I should do that with my nailhair-razors....

Babies come from the forests of nailhair ;)

Posted

^^ Heh heh, watermelon seed, that's a good one.

Babies are made when two adults get very, very drunk.

Posted

God creates babies when he doesn't want to see two people do it any more :)

Posted

It's all about the birds and the bees. The bees take the pollen from the flower, the bird eats the bee and then poops out a baby.

That didn't make much sense . . .

Posted

It's all about the birds and bees...the sweet sounding, brightly colored bird distracts women while the bee flies up and BAM! Stings them! They swell up and pop out a baby! (I know it's weak! LOL)

Posted

babies come from rifts in spacetime creating deformed copies of people

same thing for michael jackson

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