Sex-Wizard Harry Potter

[DobbyDobs]

New Challenge Tiem. BADUM TISH.

Seeing as the wonderful WerewolfWarrior accepted my previous challenge on these very forums and churned out those wonderful fics, "One Big Happy Weasley Family" (You should read, if you haven't yet. Its some awesome smut.) and the plot based "Dragon Lily" (What do ya know? He's good at writing both plot and smut)...

I'm gonna keep trying my luck here on these forums with new challenges.

Disclaimer: From this point on each and every pun, no matter how silly, is fully intentional

Title: Sex(y)-Wizard Harry Potter or The Magical Sex Doctor.

Timeframe: Anytime, no constraints apart from Harry being over 14 years old. Can be canon-complaint or not, your choice.

Category: Humor/Erotica

Basic Premise and Plot: A Harry Potter who has an ability to cast spells with his dick. Yes, you read that right, an ability to cast canon spells with his todger, his cock, his other wand. You've probably already guessed the ridiculous number of obvious puns with this plotline.

One way of going about the fic maybe: A het Creature-Harry fic

I've seen plenty of slash creature fics. But slash isn't my cup of tea. So, you can make it so that Harry has a creature inheritance (Your Choice of creature) or that he is a magical animagus or any number of creature influenced plot lines.

But the thing is that the only gift he recieves due to his Creature Influence is an ability to cast spells using his dick.

OR

Another way of going about it: The Power the Dark Lord Knows Not

Dumbledore said Love was the "power the dark lord knows not". He didn't specify what kind of love. So it is natural that the instrument of that power is the instrument of Harry's love and the instrument with which Harry spreads his love.

OR

Another way of going about it: Its just the way Harry's Wandless (Or is it?) Magic works.

Its a a unique talent that Harry comes to realize later on in his life. Hence the alternative title: The Magical Sex Doctor. He cures Non-satisfaction among women, with his dick.

Common things that must and should be present in any plotline you use:

Large dicks while rare in the wizarding world, are the same as dildos when attached to a man without the skill to use it.

->While Harry is way above average in size department, he is the only man able to work magic through his dick. Literally.

->Some Humor must be present in the fic.

A few Obvious examples:

Harry using pelvic thrusts in duels to cast spells when he loses his phoenix feather wand.

Women in his life trying out wand-movements with his dick.

Several women testing if it is indeed "The wand that chooses the wizard or witch"

Some women testing whether the Harry's semen works as a wand core.

People trying to disarm Harry with expelliarmus aimed at his dick.

(optional) Harry casting the Aquamenti/Wine producing charm through his dick. (Optional since it becomes borderline squick)

And the plethora of obvious puns and "other wand" jokes.

->Creative Erotica/Smut is a must.

I've seen fics with the normal size enhancing magic, the vibrating wands, the orgasm spells,etc,etc. By all means use these.

But...

I would love to see you get creative with the spells.

Like Harry casting the Patronus Charm through his Dick while inside a woman. Instant Euphoria.

Or Harry ordering his Dick to find a woman's G-spot using parseltongue and the ensuing extending/slythering Cock.

Or Harry animating his dick so that it softly slaps a woman's clit every few minutes.

etc,etc.

Make it creative, his dick is Magic.

->Must be Harry/Multi or Harem. If he settles down with one woman, then she should be okay-with/encourage Harry's exploits.

-> At least One scene with the following each: Harry/Narcissa, Harry/Tonks. The way Harry's Magic dick interacts with Nymphadora's Metamorphmagus magic would be most intersting.

->No Slash Please. Not my thing.

->No Angst Please. Humorous, light hearted, erotica is what I'm thinking of.

Optional Stuff:

-Harry/Molly. And in general Harry/MILFs. Yeah. Its still there. Bonus internet cookies if you include this. Pwetty Pwease.

-Harry/Veela Colony exploits as a series of interludes.

-Harry being the go-to guy for all the neighbourhood ladies of Privet Drive.

-A Harry/Voldemort duel at the end of Fourth Year where Harry uses, ahem, both his wands. While the Phoenix feather wands lock into Priori Incantatum, Harry uses a timely pelvic thrust to get in a surprise hit. Voldemort makes a stupid mistake from the shock and Humiliation of being cursed by a dick and Harry slips in an Avada Kedavara.

-Harry finding a partner in a lady (Maybe Tonks or some Veela) who has the same power, but can cast spells through her large breasts.

Edited February 4, 2015 by DobbyDobs