Somebody hire me!

[DarkInuLord]

Fucking damnit, I've been checking every job site I know of, as well as the newspaper, EVERY DAY for four months, trying to find a job.

There's NEVER any jobs within a 30 minute drive of here, and the ones I find I get denied when I apply. I swear to God I'd settle for working at McDonalds, or worse if there is such a thing, but no, not even McDonalds is hiring.

It's summer, I need a job until August, I can't find anything at all. The closest thing to part time jobs I find require traveling, or farm stuff that I don't know how to do, like irrigating an entire farm, how the hell do you do that? Some of these farms are X square miles....

I'm so desperate for money right now, if there was a market for male escorts in town I might even stoop that low, but there's not, so I won't.... Just... Goddamn I can't find a single place that is hiring, and when I do they won't hire me, what the hell am I supposed to do?

[PorkChopExpress86]

I'm so desperate for money right now, if there was a market for male escorts in town I might even stoop that low

stoop that low? if you can find women who are willing to pay you for sex you just hit the jackpot.

[DarkInuLord]

=| Some woman offered to pay for a passport, flight, and hotel, and pay me, for sex.... God, she also stalked me for months after I said no, and I finally got rid of her a while ago, scary stuff.

[Shinju]

Did you try craigslist? I have two interviews tomorrow thanks to them. Customer service. Great. I should just shoot myself ahead of time instead of having to live through the anguish of constantly wanting to bust idiot customer's heads open but not being able too because it's through a phone. Life: 1, Shinju: 0

I would have taken the sex.

[PorkChopExpress86]

I would have taken the sex.

right? if she had a full medical exam ready for me to see, i'd be good to go.

[DarkInuLord]

Yeah, I tried that, the only places hiring are farm help and nurses.

=/ Physical therapy/other doctor-ish stuff.

I also googled it and checked the first 3 whole goddamn pages of job listings and got just a couple places I could even apply for.

[Shinju]

right? if she had a full medical exam ready for me to see, i'd be good to go.

Hot Babe: Oh, PorkChopExpress, do mee nowww!

PorkChopExpress86: Before I stick it in you, there is something I must know. Do you have the herpes???

Hot Babe: wtf???

PorkChopExpress86: I'm gonna need to see some certification of a medical examination before we continue . . .

Hot Babe: gtfo.

I was just kidding, I wouldn't have taken the sex. I too fear the herpes.

[PorkChopExpress86]

Hot Babe: Oh, PorkChopExpress, do mee nowww!

PorkChopExpress86: Before I stick it in you, there is something I must know. Do you have the herpes???

Hot Babe: wtf???

PorkChopExpress86: I'm gonna need to see some certification of a medical examination before we continue . . .

Hot Babe: gtfo.

I was just kidding, I wouldn't have taken the sex. I too fear the herpes.

if she's willing to pay all that money to fly someone over, she could get tested in advance.

[Shinju]

if she's willing to pay all that money to fly someone over, she could get tested in advance.

I'm sure she would do it too, if asked, seeing as she was willing to pay for everything and all just to bone him. Where were you meeting people, DarkInuLord? AdultFriendFinder??? Heh heh, the other AFF. I think you have to have been chatting it up in a place like that to meet somebody who would give such an offer. I once new someone who advertised in one of those swinger magazines and couples offered her tons of money to go all over the world with them. As far as I know she never took any of them up . . . but that's just as far as I know.

Do you know how much money we could make if we opened a bar/std testing center? People can get tested, have a few drinks, meet their partner for the night, get the results of the test and then we could sell them a room once they get the "All clear" certificate. Haha, just kidding, I think those tests take a while to come in anyways. But wouldn't it be awesome if we could advertise "Have your results ready in about an hour." Kind of like buying glasses, but for sex.

[greenwizard]

I'd hire you to clean my house... That should take a week at least.

[DarkInuLord]

Well I found a place, it's shitty but I still hope I get the job.

3 days a week, $9 an hour janitorial. Yes, I'm cleaning toilets for a living if I get the job, and I don't even care. >>

[Shinju]

^^ Good luck cleaning the lady's bathrooms. You'll know what I mean.

[DarkInuLord]

Oh god.... I don't want to think about it.

[Shinju]

Heh heh heh, I guess you can say it's our little revenge against men. Er, unless it's a woman janitor. Oh well.

[DarkInuLord]

Gross. >>

I just noticed, the number they gave me was the number for the uh... You know the people in each city who clean parks, and organize city events and stuff?

It was for them. Well, it'll be 3 days next week (I'll be getting the call tomorrow most likely, if I got the job.) so it must me some type of event, maybe a fair.

I don't know, I'm new to town, I have no idea what these people do.