Review Thread for Royal Siblings

[risque]

Hi everyone!

I'm new to AFF, but eager to learn the ropes and post my stories. I recently posted Royal Siblings, an original incest story I've been working on. It's gotten a couple reviews and I'd really like to comment on them and get some other feedback for the story.

Here is the summary for the story:

To save his country, King Treyven must marry his little sister, and when he does, discovers fucking her is the best thing that's ever happened to him. (Fet, Fingering, HJ, Inc, M/F, Minor2, Oral, Preg, Solo, Toys, WIP)

Although primarily a sex-based story, it also focuses on magic and some politics, plus, of course, the minor drama involved with a brother marrying his sister for political reasons only to discover he actually really loves her and wants to continue fucking her.

Anyway, this story is definitely not for non-incest fans! To those of you who have already reviewed my story: thank you so much! Nothing motivates me to write more than people commenting, telling me if they like my story or not!

michael said:

i really liked the story and hope you continue it i'm looking forward to see what happens, although i hope your character dosen't become a complete jerk and starts hurting her, that would just ruin the story. Please continue as i said its an excellent story keep up the good work

My reply: Thank you for your review! So glad you're enjoying it so far. Part of this story will be about Treyven learning that Avalia is more than just his fuckhole and is actually a person with more to her than just her ability to please her brother/husband. It won't happen over night, though. He isn't a complete asshole who hurts her, though he can be self-centered and blind to her needs at times. It's a learning process for him.

ana maria said:

que puedo decir solamente alucinante, espero que sigas escribiendo este relato y que sea bien pronto, ana maria

My reply: I wrote this story in English, which I assume is the language you read it in, so why you left your review in Spanish is beyond me. Fortunately, Google translate managed to translate this for me to, "I can say just amazing, I hope you keep writing this story and make it soon, ana maria"

So, thank you very much! I'm really glad you're enjoying it, and there will definitely be more chapters, and soon. I plan to post the next chapter tomorrow!

kitten said:

I really liked this stories. I hope you plan on continuing it, you're a great writer. The only thing that would make this better would be some bondage or something else kinky :-)

My reply: Thank you so much! I'm not a big fan of bondage, though some light bondage is certainly possible. There will be various other kinky sex stuff later, though not all of my fetishes are ones everyone will like. Hopefully if there are any parts that aren't "hot" you (or any other reader) you'll skim past them to get to other parts that you do enjoy. I don't want to put anyone off with one kink or fetish or another, and hope to have lots. The only super constant one will be brother/sister incest, I think!

And finally (so far).

kylee said:

Incestuous Incantus. Interseting story. I wish Treyven thought of his sister as more than a fuckhole that he can use. He might be a little insane. He just deflowered the poor girl with no thought to her comfort, and he is already yelling at her to make sure to keep her pussy tight. I almost died laughing.

My reply: I find it a little disturbing you think him deflowering his sister with no thought for her comfort is funny, but then, I don't claim to understand everyone's sense of humor. Treyven is definitely out of line with how rough he treats the girl he claims to love. Part of the story will be him realizing how much of an "object" he treats her and how he can improve their relationship. Of course, that will take some time (especially because Avalia has been trained to act and be treated this way), but it's not something I'm totally unaware of. I hope you enjoyed the story besides just finding it "interseting," but I realize incest certainly isn't for everyone. Thank you for your review!

[Guest Dan]

daveb said:

Utterly fantastic. Hope it has a happy ending.

There will be a lot of ups and downs, of course, but the ultimate ending will be happy. I'm really into brother/sister incest prevailing through the triumphs and getting to have lots and lots of sex as well as their own biological happy family despite all the taboos and obstacles.

Sabaku_lotus said:

I was like, 'oh incest,' nonono...but read it anyway.

It was really hot, despite the squick, and really well written.

Haha, well, thank you very much! Incest is a huge kink for me, but I can see why it'd be a big turn off to other people. Glad you gave it a chance and enjoyed it despite being squicked by incest... And who knows, maybe this story will give you a new kink for it.

kylee replied:

I think there was a misunderstanding of my review. The part that I found hilarious was that Treyven was being such a thoughtless and selfish lover that he violently deflowered his sister when he could have chosen a more gentle approach and still had just as much fun. He was damaging/tearing up her vagina and then in the next breath he was telling her to take good care of it and keep it tight. The story is interesting but I am not turned on by the selfish sex so I am hoping that Treyven and his sister will figure things out eventually. What I really think is that he needs some advice on how to make love to a delicate young girl. If she doesn't enjoy the sex, she won't love him and she might end up betraying him for a better lover one day.

Thanks for the more thoughtful reply this time! At first I wasn't sure if you were just trolling or not, but this makes much more sense. Treyven has a lot to learn, as does Avalia. I hope to show them growing to appreciate each other more and more, and being able to communicate better. Though, Treyven will probably always be a little rough with her, 'cause that's what gets ME hot. I just suspect that Avalia will soon genuinely prefer it that way... But Treyven is also gonna learn some lessons, too. Anyway, thank you very much for the thoughtful reviews. I hope you'll keep reading and enjoying it.

[risque]

Sorry for the double post. Accidentally posted the replies unlogged in, so I'm reposting them like this. Can't figure out how to delete that Guest post, so please just ignore it.

daveb said:

Utterly fantastic. Hope it has a happy ending.

There will be a lot of ups and downs, of course, but the ultimate ending will be happy. I'm really into brother/sister incest prevailing through the triumphs and getting to have lots and lots of sex as well as their own biological happy family despite all the taboos and obstacles.

Sabaku_lotus said:

I was like, 'oh incest,' nonono...but read it anyway.

It was really hot, despite the squick, and really well written.

Haha, well, thank you very much! Incest is a huge kink for me, but I can see why it'd be a big turn off to other people. Glad you gave it a chance and enjoyed it despite being squicked by incest... And who knows, maybe this story will give you a new kink for it.

kylee replied:

I think there was a misunderstanding of my review. The part that I found hilarious was that Treyven was being such a thoughtless and selfish lover that he violently deflowered his sister when he could have chosen a more gentle approach and still had just as much fun. He was damaging/tearing up her vagina and then in the next breath he was telling her to take good care of it and keep it tight. The story is interesting but I am not turned on by the selfish sex so I am hoping that Treyven and his sister will figure things out eventually. What I really think is that he needs some advice on how to make love to a delicate young girl. If she doesn't enjoy the sex, she won't love him and she might end up betraying him for a better lover one day.

Thanks for the more thoughtful reply this time! At first I wasn't sure if you were just trolling or not, but this makes much more sense. Treyven has a lot to learn, as does Avalia. I hope to show them growing to appreciate each other more and more, and being able to communicate better. Though, Treyven will probably always be a little rough with her, 'cause that's what gets ME hot. I just suspect that Avalia will soon genuinely prefer it that way... But Treyven is also gonna learn some lessons, too. Anyway, thank you very much for the thoughtful reviews. I hope you'll keep reading and enjoying it.

Edited November 20, 2011 by risque