LockedBox

Mix Beer With Liquor And You Will Get Sicker- Review Replies and Discussion

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Welcome all, to my humble thread.

Here in these hallowed pages I shall be replying to all of the reviews left on my m/m romance story Mix Beer With Liquor and You Will Get Sicker, which can be found here.

I apologize to those whom have already reviewed, but for the sake of consistency I shall only be replying to reviews left after the creation of this thread. Know, however, that all of your praise, advice and attention made my day.

If you have a question concerning the story or myself and do not want to ask it in review form (I would prefer it if you left reviews, but it is always your call) then feel free to ask it here, I love to start up discussions anything and nothing in particular. But please note that I will not be handing out plot spoilers, detailed back stories or bank numbers just because you ask nicely. All of that will be explored in time, you'll just have to wait for it.

If you want to be kept in the loop then wander over to my promotion thread here, I'll be announcing new chapters there as well as having the odd gripe.

That's all I've got to say in the mean time. Thankyou for reading and I hope to hear from you all soon!

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i remember this. so it sounds like more is coming.
just wondering, what year is this?


Good to see I haven't been completely forgotten! Thankyou for reading anon, and you can certainly bet that more is coming!

The story isn't really precise enough to be called true historical fiction, but it is closely based on Britain during the late Victorian period. I've changed lot of things around such as ignoring several wars that occurred at the time and restructuring the laws to benefit my characters and their respective character archs, and I really wanted to build settings that were my own. For instance, sodomy was illegal and carried a jail sentence in England until the year of 1967, and remained illegal in some parts of the UK until 1992! That would definitely throw a spanner into the character archs I wanted to write so I exercised my artistic license and fudged that law a little. Edited by LockedBox

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I remember this story! lol

I read the first chapter and thought to myself that it sounded so familiar. Then I went into the reviews and noticed I read it back in July.

Glad you're back!

To second that question your last reviewer had: when is this supposed to be? What year? You mentioned sodomy had been legalized for ten years and there are no cars? Just horse and carriages? Is this the 1800's? 1900's?

Anyway, I look forward to more! :)

Glad to be here!

Like I said before, this is set in a work akin to the late 1800's. I used a lot of artistic license with the laws and society of the time for the sake of story telling. I know it sounds like a bit of a cop out but I know my characters, if they lived the real 1800's poor Lauchlan would have a nervous break down and Corbin would undoubtedly be in rotting in gaol, so I shaped the world around the story that I wanted to write instead of trying to twist the story to fit a specific time and place. I wouldn't recommend writing this way, seeing as I've written myself into corners several times now. But I still think the end product is worth reading, and so long as it is I'm going to keep writing it. It's my first story after all, experience is the best way to learn.

Edited by LockedBox

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(Only read chapter 1) I liked this. A nice idea for the beginning a story: sets the scene and tells us a little bit about the characters. Also, nice visual descriptions.

I don't think we need to know quite so much about Ida just yet, I felt like she was being forced into things. I would imagine that we're going to find out more about her later and I think she might be better placed in more detail later. Also, I felt that Lauchlan was a bit quick on the update of offering to have further sex with a man he's a) just met when b) he doesn't seem to be that sure of his sexuality. I think it might be better paced if more of the encounter kept coming back to him, and as he realises it's something he enjoyed, but isn't entirely comfortable with, that he contacts Corbin.

I'll come back to read what happens later, as I did enjoy this and I'm looking forward to seeing where it goes.

Thankyou for reading lisbetadair and I'm so sorry it's taken me so long to reply! University is a demanding mistress and it slipped my mind.

Thankyou so much for the flattering comments and constructive criticism. It's great to get feedback like this, which is surprisingly hard to come by in this community. As for your concerns, I definitely see where you are coming from, I was a bit too hasty when I posted my first chapter, and looking back at it there are a lot of things I'd like to change if I can find the time. It was important for me to establish Ida's "presence" early, seeing as Lauchlan thinks about her often. With what I know now, I probably could have introduced her a little more gently, and I'll definitely keep that in mind if I can scrounge up enough time and creativity for that edit.

As for your second point, I don't want to give too much away but it is important that their relationship starts out the way that it does. I probably could have written it a little more smoothly, but I'm confident that the way that it's done is best for both the characters and the plot. These machinations will become more apparent as the story unfolds.

Thankyou again for reading and I'm glad that you enjoyed it, I hope that you enjoy the following chapters just as much as the first!

Edited by LockedBox

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Hello again. I have now read Chapters 2 and 3, both which I enjoyed. You have a mature, developed writing style that makes this easy to read. You've clearly given thought to the descriptions of the world which are both visual and evocative without being overly technical, despite a lot of the chapter being given over to the workings of the stables. Chapter 2 was a great time to let us learn a bit more about Lauchlan without disrupting the pace of the first chapter.

There are a few typos which unfortunately change the meaning of several sentences e.g. "most probably tucked up in nice warm hoes" which I'm fairly sure isn't what you actually meant to say! But the rest of it is perfectly proof-read so that's probably bad luck more than anything else, and not much you can do about apart from being extra meticulous (says she who obviously never makes a typo ).

Making a point about one of your creative decisions, I know that line about sticking the hot water bottle in his groin is perhaps based on a misguided sense of helpfulness, but it just seems so out-there that I find it rather jarring. It doesn't do anything for sexual tension, I feel. It just seems to be there because sex is going to happen at some point and it feels almost mechanical.

I'm really looking forward to reading more of this, and it's great that you update the "promote a story" thread to let us know when you've updated.

-Lisbet Adair

Hi, it's good to see you again.

Thankyou so much for the complements! It's means a lot to hear that you find my style easy to read, as I tend to wander off topic and talk about things noone care about in real life conversations. To hear that my writing is pushing all the buttons I want to push is very relieving :blush:

Thanks for telling me about the typos, and please continue pointing them out if you find more. I have a bad habit of going to edit a sentence, pressing delete once and then changing my mind and forgetting to press undo. If you saw the raw version you would find a lot of typos like that. Though not all of them would be quite as amusing :rolleyes: I wouldn't be surprised if that particular typo was inserted after it was beta'd, as my beta is pretty good at picking those up. I'll try to be more vigilant in future :Eye:

Now, about the hot waterbottle. I know it sounds rather silly (and in retrospect Corbin's reaction may have been a bit too hammy) but that is actually what you should do in a case of hypothermia. I take regular courses in first aid for work and for when I'm camping, and had my manual to hand when I was writing this particular bit. Placing a source of heat between a persons legs, toward the groin, and then folding the persons legs towards their chest is one of the best ways to help raise a persons body temperature (though placing a source of heat in the armpits and around the neck are also recommended, if you can manage all four you definitely should) because the femoral arteries are both very close to the surface there and will help move the heat through the body, and then folding their legs towards their torso helps to prevent any of the heat from escaping. True facts!

Thanks again for reading and leaving such useful feedback. I hope you continue to enjoy my writing efforts and I'll see you next chapter :hug:

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Now, about the hot waterbottle.

I'm not going to criticise someone for being accurate, just whether or not it's relevant to this particular character and whether or not it works in the scene. If you're familiar with the technicalities of something, you can get bogged down ensuring that everyone's clear on the accuracy of it when I feel that's not what matters about this scene. Yes, it does give you a way to move into the technicalities of their relationship, but I felt we could segue into this a bit more smoothly.

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I love this! I wonder what happens to their relationship after the snow storm. I'm looking forward for more chapters. I can't wait to see how their relationship builds up. Keep writing! :) -isolovesj

Hey iso, thankyou so much for your encouragment, knowing that other people are enjoying my scribblings means a lot to me. Hopefully I'll be able to keep you lot satisfied in the chapters to come :thumbsup:

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Scrobette 2014-04-13 id # 3000217760 I love this story and I am always overjoyed when I see a new chapter. I hope you will have Lachlan heed Corbin's advice and Kick those useless urchin workers of his into shape.

The chemistry between these 2 gentlemen smoulders!! YUM!! I can't wait for the next chapter. :)

Thankyou so much :blush: It's really reassuring to know that the dynamic is coming across the way I want it to. Lauchlan knows Corbin's right, but you'll have to wait and see if he can summon the backbone to do what needs to be done, it's not an easy thing for him.

Thanks again for reviewing, it really makes my day every time :)

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Ah, two reviews so many hours, you've made a very happy author of me :D

Deedee

I just spent last night and most of the day reading this story, and I love it!!!!! I love basically everything about this story! I love the names, Lauchlan is such a brilliant name! (btw is it pronounced Lock-lan or another way) I also love the fact that Lauchlan and Corbin are not two drop dead gorgeous men. The stories I read are usually filled with them, so it was very refreshing to read about these too. Lauchlan is just too cute, I love the whole big-awkward-fumbling-man thing he was going on. He is so insecure about himself, and it makes him so irresistible and you just instantly love him. I also love how Corbin doesn't know how to truly express himself and hide behind the whole mean guy personality. Theit interactions with each other are very endearing and I truly hope the best for them and I hope they have a happy ending, though I am kinda scared for the violence next chapter, I think Corbin and Lauchlan truly need each other, they just need to realize it!!! I reeeaaaalllllyyyyy hope you update soon!!! I can't wait for the next chapter, you are such an amazing author :)

Wow, thanks for such a detailed review! Sorry for coming between you and your sleep, but I'm glad it was worth it.

I've been feeling the same way actually. I mean, I'm all for a little wish fulfillment, but after a while I really start to crave something more attainable in my fiction. We've all read the story about the main character that gets seduced by a tall, dark, handsome stranger (who usually has bucketloads of cash) a hundred times now, and I wanted to write about something else. I'm glad I'm not the only one ^_^

Have you ever heard of tvtropes? A bit off topic I know but your comments about Corbin reminded me of it. The character trope pages are surprisingly helpful character building tools. I can't decide whether Corbin is a stepford snarker or a jerkass with a heart of gold, or both. What do you reckon?

As for your question, yes it is pronounced lock-lan. Lauchlan is an alternative spelling of Lachlan, which itself was originally spelled as Lochlann. From what I've read the u has been added in and taken out of it repeatedly over the years and makes no real difference to the pronunciation. Personally I liked the way that Lauchlan looks when it's written down, so that's the spelling I went with.

I don't want to give away spoilers or talk about things which haven't been written yet, but do try not to be afraid for next chapter. I don't want to say anything else about it, but just hold out and see. It will be out relatively soon, that I will say.

Rae

Amazing use of the word pachyderm! I'm a little in love with you right now.

Don't be, I'm smelly and I snore at night, our love would be doomed from the start :cry:

In all seriousness I'm so glad that there's someone out there who finds my ill written humour, well, humorous. I almost worked the word "ungulates" into chapter six, but I just couldn't pull it off. Maybe next time, eh ;)

Thankyou both for your reviews and support, it really makes my day every time I read them.

Edited by LockedBox

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Guest deedee

I know exactly what you mean! Love them, but enough is enough sometimes! I like jerkass with a heart of gold, seems more fitting. Good choice going with the u, it does look better. Also, Yay for relatively soon update!!!!! :)

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DeeDee

*hugs Lauchlan tightly, gives him a kiss on the forehead, and murmurs words of comfort* Poor Lauchlan, what a traumatic experience, I've been giving my cockatoo the stink for about 5 minutes now. Corbin should've stayed and Lauchlan should've asked him to stay! Oh Lauchlan you big coward, man up and go for what you want! Gay Romance would be so much easier for men if they had a miniature women on their shoulder whispering in their ear. Nonetheless great chapter, though I did have to skim through Lachlan's experience with one eye open.

Aww, there's no need to give your poor cockie the stink eye. If Lauchlan had brushed with a parrot he'd be missing an ear, not an eye!

I don't think having a shoulder-woman would help him much, in all seriousness. Have you ever read Pride and Prejudice? It's not quite the same era or setting but the ideals of masculinity in MBWLAYWGS are very similar to those held in P&P. The masculine ideal is to be stoic and composed at all times. To see a grown man like Lauchlan break down like that is almost unheard of in "civilized" company. There's no Freud yet, no real principles of psychology to draw from, and if it was anyone but Corbin witnessed this, Lauchlan would probably end up branded as emotionally unstable and dangerous, or at the very least distasteful. Having a feminine figure encouraging him to emasculate himself would probably make him feel even worse, even if she was completely right. It's a bad situation for everyone involved.

Though now you've put the image in my head I'm imagining Lauchlan's inner child on his other shoulder yelling "Help, I'm being repressed!" and that's much funnier than it has any right to be.

Sorry if this chapter was a bit too gory to stomach. I hadn't intended for it to be quite so graphic when I planned it out, but the more I wrote the more is seemed that the graphic violence was needed. Anything else seemed to downplay it too much, and that would be too underwhelming with all the build up I've put into Lauchlan's mental state. I hope I ended up striking a good balance here, Though I do understand if some of it was a bit too much. It was hard to write at times, but it needed to be done. Just try to remember that Lauchlan is going to be okay, and it might be a little easier to read.

Edited by LockedBox

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Scrobette

Poor Lauchlan...He is so very much deserving of a "break". Please give him the courage to ask Corbin to return...Lauchlan is in desperate need of that man. I want them both to be happy...and I still want to see Lauchlan really whip those Urchins into shape. They need to be taught to respect him...those little whippersnappers!!

I really do love this story. The way you describe everything in such detail has me believing that I am standing in the midst of the action. Incredible and exciting!

Yeah, poor Lauchlan does get raked across the coals in this one. Unfortunately for him I am a somewhat cruel author, nowhere near GRR levels of course (I can dream though, can't I?) but it's not going to be butterflies and songbirds for Lauchlan, not for quite some time.

Thanks so much for your complements, I've been trying so hard to keep things engaging, I'm so glad it's paying off ^_^

Edited by LockedBox

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Scrobette

I'm always ecstatic when I see a new chapter...Hurrah!! This chapter is wonderful... I feel all the misery that Lauchlan is experiencing and your setting descriptions are perfect... I even felt the cold and wet...and that's pretty awesome since I live in Blistering Hot South Texas. Can't wait for more.... please.

Well hurrah yourself ^_^ I admit my reaction is much the same whenever reviews are delivered to my inbox, so I know the feeling! Thankyou for your kind praise, and I'm glad to bring a little of the miserable British weather over to the states. I had the pleasure of visiting britan for a few weeks in the early winter and the weather was more or less what the media leads you to believe, wet, wet and wet! It's not to different here in oz during the winter, only much muggier and with more mosquitos.

Staar

Thank you for the update, I had thought you had forgotten it...Chapter was good, the kids kinda scared me a little.. I thought they were going to do something bad to him....see you soon with another update !!!!!!!!

Of course not! I will admit my update schedule is next to nonexistent, and with uni starting up things will be rather thin on the ground in the next few months (it's shaping up to be a very busy semester!) but I will finish this thing, one way or the other. I was really wanted to finish this thing this year, but with the way that the story just keeps growing I'll have to push that deadline back to February, barring any disasters. As for the children, well, don't be too afraid. They may think highly of themselves but think about how Lauchlan must look from their perspective, he may not act the part but he's an intimidating figure. There really isn't much they'd dare to do to him directly, and they aren't really imaginative enough to indulge in any decent pranking. Still though, this isn't the last you've seen of them yet :thumbsup:

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Staar

you wrote the chapter really good ok...In those times it must of been very hard, not that they are not now,...thing have changed but all there yet....thanks for the update and see you soon.!1!!!

Thankyou staar! I'm so sorry I haven't gotten back to you until now, I'm afraid that uni's been keeping me busy and your review kinda got lost in the shuffle. Thankyou for your support and for following my scribblings ^_^

KaiBlueOtaku

I was a little shocked in your notes to see you are a cishet female... Your work is stunning, and since I identify more on the spectrum of what I consider genderfluid, I definitely think you've done a wonderful job of exploring the mental trauma of Laughlan as he comes to terms with his sexuality (and his other baggage). Thank you for Laughlan finally asking Corbin to stay the night... I've been waiting so much for it. Laughlan needs a level of comfort and intimacy that I'm worried Corbin might not be willing to provide. Corbin seems to be looking for a "friends with benefits"sort of situation, and Laughlan needs something more. I just wish he could open up, and let Corbin know. This story is magnificently well written, minor errors and all. I'm curious about Corbin, what's his story? I hope this one continues for a long time still, I love it! Thank you for sharing your world and its inhabitants with us, it's a fascinating place. You're wildly talented, the writing on this is flawless in its quality.

:wub: Aww, thankyou so much! You're gonna make me blush you flatterer! Thankyou so much for your insightful feedback and your reasurances, it's very good to know that I'm getting something right. Lauchlan isn't done with his baggage yet I'm afraid, but the worst is over. As for Corbin, well, Corbin is just complicated. It's a bit difficult to explore Corbin with the story grounded in Lauchlan's perspective and Corbin being, well, Corbin. However, the next few chapters will hopfully start the ball rolling on that front and I do hope you like it. Thankyou again, I hope to hear from you again some time :)

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KaiBluOtaku

Chapter 12- I like this story so well. Your characters are so dimensional and layered, and the reading is very intriguing. Initially, I thought Corbin just wanted a piece of tail, but as much as he comes around without claiming his 'rain check,' I'm beginning to think maybe he's just as lonesome as Lauchlan is for a companion, though he's not as open about it. I'm hugely amused by the fact that they're ACTUALLY playing backgammon, and I was pleased that Theresa wasn't familiar with the slang, that might have been awkward!

I thought it was a good chapter, I liked it, and we got a little peek into Corbin's history as well. I see he's rather a tangled ball of string to unravel, so we'll have to be patient with him I suppose. Lauchlan wears his heart more on his sleeve, which is one if his most endearing characteristics.

Thank you for the mention that you appreciate having your mistakes pointed out, I'll read with more care next time, and note them for you as I go along. I've got an eye for that sort of thing, so if it's solicited, I'm more than glad to help (though I can't commit to a full beta position for anyone else at this time).

Rest assured, you'll hear from me. I'm a noisy reader, and I like 'paying' writers of good stories I enjoy, with feedback reviews. You're the first I've seen to have a separate review reply thread, it's nice though, thank you. And I do stalk my favorite stories on here regularly for updates, so I'll be around!

Well, hello again Kai, great to hear from you so soon.

I'm very glad to hear you liked it, this chapter was a fun one to write, though not the most cheerful of the bunch. I'm glad that you got a laugh out of the backgammon scene, it really was a slang term for sodomy back in the 1800's which I found rather hilarious as well, which pretty much lead to this whole chapter. Not sure why people stopped using it to be honest, it's pretty subtle and witty compared to todays euphamisims.

And hey, if you feel at all inclined out my many mistakes then please, please feel free! I live and breathe for concrit, and if you think I can make this story better than I would definitly love hear it. I did have a betareader at one point, but real life, the demanding mistress that she is, snatched her from me. It's just too late in the game for me to build up that kind of relationship again, so I'm trying to teach myself to edit, and rope in my RL friends when I can get away with it. I think I'm improving a lot but a lot of stuff gets through all the same, so any help in catching it is appreciated.

Thatnkyou again for leaving such lovelly, helpful reviews. It's always a joy to find one in my inbox and I'll be looking forward to hearing from you again :)

Yblue

I put this story on my ‘to read list’ over a year ago. Had I known it would blow me away like it did, I sure as hell wouldn’t have waited for so long! Your story has a fairly slow and detailed, but great flow, so you really shouldn’t be insecure about it. Your characters are wonderful human beings with their flaws and imperfections, and your story telling brings the setting to life in a way that it’s almost tangible. Absolutely brilliant.

Lauchlan is a unique, but wonderful and adorable main character. Though his actions, and more often his thoughts have made me facepalm probably at least once in every chapter. I’m even more intrigued with Corbin. There’s still so much mystery about him, and Lauchlan may love him, but he sure as hell doesn’t understand him. I somehow like that Lauchlan doesn’t try to extract any information from him, and instead fairly passively wait for his ‘debt’ to be collected, although there’s a kind of sadness to that too, and I feel Corbin will address that expectation again in the near future. But what I meant to say was that I think it should be okay sometimes if you don’t tell your lover your darkest secrets. I hope I’m making sense here. I could go to sleep now and review in the morning when my head is clearer, but I’m not going to.

I was also very glad to read your sidenote on the fact that in this setting, Lauchlan can never be out. Although it seems rather obvious, I’ve come across fiction that appears to be set in a historic timeframe, but then suddenly it turns out to be some magical fantasy land and everybody is supportive about all the gayness and they lived happily ever after. In Edwardian times you didn’t come out. Period. It’s good that you stay true to your setting. So to their environment Lauchlan and Corbin will be just two friends who occasionally share a drink or play a game of backgammon. I like the way Lauchlan was adjusting to that idea in the last chapter.

So yea, I’ll be looking forward to updates! You have a new fan.

JC

Yblue

Okay, I read my review again and realized that I made it seem like I thought the story was set in Edwardian times. I meant to say that I like that you stay true to the concept and setting of your setting. I hope that's how you would interpret it anyway.

For some reason I also want to tell you that I've read your bio, and read that you'd like to meet other people with Asperger's, and I've been told by two different people that my main character of 'Unconditional Love' might have Asperger's, but I'm neither able nor qualified to tell if he does, and he's a fictional character. Also, my best friend's son is diagnosed with it too, he's a great kid but he's seven and doesn't speak English, so that information is fairly useless to you as well, I suppose.

*sigh* I know how it feels as a writer to get good reviews and unfortunately I'm not very adept at writing them.

Hello! Waking up to find not one but two lovelly long reviews was quite a way to start my weekend.

Thankyou so much for your kind words and encouragment, it really does mean a lot to me :blush:

I love hearing how other people respond to my characters, your facepalming annectode made me laugh! That's Lauchlan for you though, if he didn't make you groan every chapter I wouldn't be writing him right. His perception of the world, and of himself, is rather different from everyone elses, and that can result in some things being lost in translation. His understanding of social cues is even less comprehensive than that.

I feel the same about people copping out with being 'out' in historical settings. Having one or two side characters in on it is alright, but there can only be so many rainbows and puppies before my suspension of disbelief snaps all together. Homophobia isn't something that can be magically fixed by a sit down and talking to. It's an insipid, irrational mindset that's been ingrained in western culture and religion for so long that it's become part of it. If it were otherwise we wouldn't be fighting it tooth and nail after all these years.

I actually intended Lauchlan's breakdown to be a fair bit darker in the first draft, culmnating in Lauchlan questioning his own sanity. I ended up easing up on that because I felt like I was just dumping too much hardship on him, to the point where he was becoming too much of a chewtoy, and a bit too 'special' which made him less believable. I do miss some of the dialouge I got out of that little plot cul-de-sac but I'm glad I cut it out, it was rather melodramatic, more than it really needed to be, and I really don't have the skill to pull of that kind of crisis well.

I do know what you mean about the setting. But it's perfectly okay if you think of it as being a little bit edwardian in style. I avoided giving specific dates or real world place names because I wanted to leave things open to interpretation. Imagining it in the edwardian era would not be any less valid than anything other interpretation.

It's nice to hear about other characters on the spectrum, even if it's unintentional. I'll give it a read if I have the time, there really arn't many to be found in adult literature.

And don't worry, you a very good at writing reviews from what I've just read. If you give everyone feedback like this, you'll have a lot of happy authors!

Thankyou so much, and i hope to hear from you two again some time :D

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I actually intended Lauchlan's breakdown to be a fair bit darker in the first draft, culmnating in Lauchlan questioning his own sanity. I ended up easing up on that because I felt like I was just dumping too much hardship on him, to the point where he was becoming too much of a chewtoy, and a bit too 'special' which made him less believable. I do miss some of the dialouge I got out of that little plot cul-de-sac but I'm glad I cut it out, it was rather melodramatic, more than it really needed to be, and I really don't have the skill to pull of that kind of crisis well.

I absolutely understand. Writing, or any original creative work, is ‘kill your darlings’. I keep chewing on a concept, map outlines, write pieces of conversations before I even start the real work. And every chapter I keep cutting, mending, scratching, and rewriting until it’s right. So, I relate. I don’t understand how other people manage to write/update so fast, unless they have really nothing else to do…

I’d be honoured if you read my story if you have time but don’t feel obliged if it turns out not to be your thing. It happened to me before that I decided to check on the work of one of my favourite reviewers, but then took a look at their warnings and found that I really really didn’t want to read it. (I mean warnings like ‘mpreg’ and such; the kind that makes me click away as fast as I can!)

Ah and there was one thing I keep forgetting to say: I originally read your story because of the summary. My new story also starts with a guy waking up in another man’s bed and I wanted to make sure there weren’t too many similarities. I’d have hated to be accused of plagiarism. Thankfully however, aside from the first chapter featuring a bed, I'm happy to let you know my story is absolutely completely different.

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It took me a while to be able to read this chapter as i currently reisde in places where adult sites are being blocked. Very inconvenient. I managed to read it two weeks ago and enjoyed it very much as always. Unfortunately it took me this long to get unblocked wifi again so I forgot most of what I wanted to say about this chapter...let's see what I can remember... Lauchlan is a really sweet guy, but I feel a bit sorry for Theresa. I hope she 'll find her fortune with some other nice person someday. My dried ginger is quite soft and very spicy, I suppose it's an acquired taste. And honestly, I still like Corbin more with every chapter.

Though it might take me a while to review, I' be eagerly waiting for the next chapter.

Hey! I’m sorry it took me so long to get back to you. I have an email especially for all my writing accounts, which normally is quite useful for avoiding spam and such, but I’ve been so deep in my exam-induced seclusion that I neglected to check it. I’ve got it now though, and thanks so much for finding the time to leave me feedback, even under adverse circumstances. I’m glad you like Corbin, things are going to become a bit more interesting for him as time goes on, or at least I hope so. Don’t worry too much about Theresa. She’s young, and she’s got a good head on her shoulders, she’ll be alright. With your internet, I also cross post to AO3, here. Most blockers don’t block it in my experience, so that might be a bit more convenient for you.

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Tahn
I just found this story and I love it. The pacing is a little slow, but in this story it actually works well. Instead of rushing into things we get to see his life, and it's kinda refreshing. I hope things work out for them in the end without people getting hurt.

Aww, thanks! I was conscerned that the slow pacing might be offputting to people, I'm nothing if not verbeous and I don't think I could write anything shorter than ten thousand words if I tried to, and boy have I tried to. So the pacing really couldn't be anything but slow. I'm glad to hear you liked it. I can't make any promises without spoiling things, but if it's any comfort, I would tag things like character death and hatecrimes in the description, I'm not the sort of author who likes to dump that sort of thing into the plot without preamble. Still, things aren't always going to be smooth sailing for the two of them, especially given the times they live in.

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I understand. I'm also glad that you don't plan a character death. I hate when I get attached to a character and the author kills them off. I've actually cried before when that happens.

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Anon 2016-02-23 id # 3000230714 Poor, twitchy Lauchlan. I'd probably be annoyed with how he gets when he's all nervous but I do the exact same thing when I'm flustered. Loving the story so far and can't wait for the next chapter!

Yeah, it's a bit that way. Lauchlan has always had anxiety issues, it's just how he is, and that would be bad enough by itself, but with everything he has to worry about and everything that's happened to him, it tends to overwhelm him sometimes. He tries though! Thankyou very much for reviewing, I'm glad you liked it :)

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Moku_Sui amy88chou@gmail.com 2016-03-05

wow, I can't believe this started in 2011. I skipped a few chapters and just started reading the most recent one. Made me sad. I wonder what Corbin is thinking...

Yeah, to say that this has been something of an ongoing project for me would be an understatement -_- I never expected it to go on this long, I thought it would be a 40-60k project, but, well, here we are. If you liked chapter sixteen then it would probably be a good idea for you to read the rest to get a better idea of whats going on, granted that may take some time. But, to address your question, there's a lot of stuff going on in Corbin's head right now. Not much of it good. It's all going to come to ahead soon.

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Guest KaiBlueOtaku

My God, it lives... I can't tell you how happy I am. I've held onto the link for this, for rather a while, hoping against hope that it hadn't been well and truly abandoned. I really wanted to know how things worked out between them. Thank you for coming back to it. I myself am coming back to some long dusty pieces of my own. Perhaps it's a season for it, eh?

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Ah, Kai hello! It does indeed live! I'm so glad I haven't lost you all after being away so long. I'm sorry it took me so long to update. I didn't mean to neglect it, it just, wouldn't go. I tried to write but it just didn't want to happen. I'm sorry it took me so long to update. Maybe it is the season! I mean there was that Jesus guy who came back from the dead around this time of year, wasn't there? Though I'm not sure if most folks would appreciate me correlating the two :P I hope you like the new chapters!

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Guest Meid

This is amazing! I'd been looking for good original stories a while so why didn't I found your story earlier xD

I really love those scenes where Lauchlan and Corbin are just enjoying each others company. Like that time Lauchchan cooked him porridge or when they're just eating together. Lauchlan is just too cute.

At first I got a little bist confused with the timeline. I was sure this story would play in the actual time first. But this playing in the 1900 makes everything much more interesting.

Thank you 😊

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