Kimmimaru

Concrit is good, what is bad is when people stalk you across TWO seperate websites simply to spam your stories saying they're shit. A human being can only take so much abuse before cracks begin to show. I have confidence ups and downs, some days the abuse doesn't bother me, other days it really gets to me and somedays I crack and go a little insane. It's just a perfectly natural human reaction, nothing to be ashamed of. As i've said before, concrit is something an author can use to improve, calling someone's work 'shit' and telling them to go die is as far from concrit as you can go. Recently I was also called a Homophobe on FF . Net (It's a friggin' trolls nest there! Lol) for doing a Kinky Slash one-shot that involved one of the characters dressing in womens underwear...I laughed at that, however, if I'm on a downer it would probably affect me a lot more than it should. I do accept that publishing on a public forum involves risks, it's inevitable, but I do it for the few people who do give concrit and those who genuinely enjoy reading my stories...i mean, they have to be out there somewhere, lol. Even the most well known Authors probably suffer from moments where they doubt themselves, again, it's only human to do so. No one goes through life without having some doubts, and sometimes other people's nastiness can really affect one's confidence. It's just one of those sad things.

I know the one I left up as an example was a poor example of this person being trollish, if it had just been this single review then fine, i'd ignore it. Unfortunately, as I said, this same person did leave some other comments which were the same as I get everywhere else. I understand that you can't really do much from this, that's fine. Thanks for replying anyway.

Now, I am not 100% sure whether people would count this as a troll but I'm reporting them just in case. They are one of those who are apparently stalking me, they commented on another of my stories but I deleted the comments as they were just rude. I kind of hoped they'd go away after that but obviously they haven't. -.-' Here's the profile link to the person who has been (in the past) unreasonably nasty: http://members.adult-fanfiction.org/profile.php?no=1296930818 Here's an example of their latest review: Body of review from venesavv follows: your stories only get worst with every new story! It's pretty mild compared to other stuff I have received but it IS irritating, to me this isn't a review, this is just an opinion. Reviews should be constructive, surely? Maybe I'm wrong and this isn't one of the hoards of trolls following me, if it's not considered a troll I apologise. (Maybe i'm getting paranoid, lol) I did delete the original review on my story...which was stupid of me. I kind of did it automatically...the Copypasta of the Review came from the e-mail sent to me when I got it. I'm an idiot. Lol. So, there may be nothing anyone can do as it's not really offensive or anything but there we go, I didn't know what else to do.

Personally I found it hilarious, but then I have read many a fanfiction that was simply terrible and laughed...I suppose it's why I like those really cheap crappy horror movies so much.

Now, I know how old the fanfiction 'My Immortal' is but I am curious as to what others think of it. I read it all the way through, after suffering horrendous headaches while attempting the feat, and have found that actually it's appears to be a very clever Parody. The spelling, structure and all the rest is awful (even worse than mine, and I'm Dyslexic! Lol) However, if it is a Trollfic it is an extremely clever one, the reactions alone are enough to show how successful it is. My only issue is that it makes a lot of references that for an English writer is a little confusing, things such as 'Preps' I had to ask someone what that word meant. So, I'm just curious what others think...Is it a very poor attempt at fanfiction or is it a clever troll?

Oh look, Kimmimaru's having yet another rant! Lol. Sorry, I may be getting rather boring but this is something I find very odd indeed... Ronald Billius Weasley (That is an epic middle name isn't it? Lol) from Harry Potter...I have to ask, why do so many people hate on him? I have to say that I absolutely ADORE his character, every time I read the original books he has me in stitches. He's funny and even in the movies Rupert Grint portrays him perfectly (in my head he is now how I imagine Ron when I read the book or even fanfic). I love the way Rowling wrote him, he's a little immature at times but let's be realistic here how many teenage boys are mature? Then you have those who write slash and end up turning the female characters into utter bitches, in Canon they're not (Apart from Bellatrix and perhaps Narcissa) I have read several fics where the girls, such as Ginny Wealsey and Hermione Granger are portrayed as bitchy, nasty and generally not very nice, which completely deviates from known canon. Ginny does stupid stuff, such as write in Tom Riddle's diary, but for gods sake people she's ELEVEN! I ask anyone to truthfully say that they weren't plagued by idiocy at that age, especially when it came to trying to sift through all the hormones racing around your pre-teen brain and confusing everything. Hermione Granger is a little hoity-toity to begin with but Ron and Harry calm her down and as the books progress she becomes a loyal and brilliant friend. Lastly, I have read at least one fanfic where the writer has demonised Dumbledore...once again refusing to take into account that he is only human. He admits it himself in canon and says to Harry that he made a mistake where he was concerned. Everything he does is for a definate reason and yes, it does cause more harm than good in certain cases (Ootp being a prime example) but ultimately if it wasn't for good ol' Dumble's Harry would have been murdered on the spot as soon as he first encountered Voldemort. Ultimately, the main issues I have with demonising these characters is because people seem to prefer to turn Canon characters into some kind of Canon-esque Mary-sue type creatures...which is so, so wrong! It defeats one of Rowlings main theme's in the original books; THE CHARACTERS ARE SUPPOSED TO BE FLAWED! THEY ARE HUMAN BEINGS! Damnit people! No one is perfect, get OVER it. I have had many, many reviews calling my versions of Sirius Black weak...because in my stories I exaggerate his home-life into an extremely abusive one, because in my opinoin no one who hates their family THAT much had a happy home life. He is a very disturbed individule in Canon and this COULD be due to having suffered some form of abuse at home...it is blatent from the reaction of his mother's portrait that at least a part of it was mental abuse. But anyway, back to the reviews, I have written some from the perspective of Sirius as a child, someone has decided to try and tell me that by making Sirius cry I am making him a 'Pussy' (Their words.) Let me just say that as far as I am concerned a six/seven/eight year old being punched in the face is hardly going to have the emotionally control to stop tears...get a grip you idiots. I have researched the mental/physical affects of abuse victims (I am writing and original story that has some abuse in it) and I can deduce that children who are abused will carry the scarring into their own lives. Even Harry Potter is not immune to mental scars, he is tortured by Voldemort in GoF and he is pretty messed up for a while...Alice and Frank Longbottom end up with horrific mental and physical damage from constant torture...and yet obviously I'm STILL wrong to have children cry when they're tortured and abused... No. Just...no. (Lastly, of course, It's MY fucking story thank you, so unless you have some reasons why I should make Sirius ignore the fact that his own father is beating the shit out of him then STFU and get out) Back to my OP, I am still utterly confuzzled as to why people turn the female characters and certain male ones into demons when in Canon they're really not...Perhaps someone could shed some light on this as I have no idea, lol.

Askew is never a bad thing, in fact, as words go it's actually quite a good one...Askew...yes, I like it. It will now officially be my word of the day!

Hmm...I'm just getting the hang of this forum thing. Its so big it's a little overwhelming! Lol. I have posted a few topics, mostly bitching about trolls. But this topic is going to be a ramble, probably about bugger all. So, first off I was taking a beak (look) at the Hall of Shame, I was quite interested to see what people do as far as plagiarising work went...well, some of it made me chuckle but then I remembered that I myself have actually used direct quotes/sections of JK Rowling's work...and I had a brief panic where I had to go through it all and double check it was all properley cited, lol. (I hope it is...) I got to thinking about why I used sections of JK Rowling's books in my fanfiction as, let's be honest, it's not really very creative is it? I chose to do it because I try to write as close to canon as possible, I used sections from the original story to bulk out my own story and squeeze it in nice and neatly. I suppose I do that because in the story in question I was writing for 'background' characters, I wanted to write in the bits she hadn't written. I am not sure if that can be considered creative or not, it's certainly not very original! Next random babble: Obsession! I have a thing in my fanfic writing where I insist on researching every tiny possible detail, this goes from Author's interviews to the Wiki pages...I look at it ALL! I do it so that I can get the best possible understanding of my chosen fandom, I also go to extreme's as far as other research goes. I look into phsycology, sexual kinks and basically anything that I do not have personal experience of. I want to make my stories as close to realistic as possible, I hope this shows through in my writing but I have had many people give me the impression that they don't actually like the realism...hmm. Oh I also must note that as I am writing some Original stuff I do tend to rehash over the same issues, as in, many of my stories are going to have similarities in plot, this is simply because I testing the various ways I can write about certain issues, notably child abuse. Once again, this is a sore point for many of my trolls...but I need to explore as many avenues as possible and find the best to put in my original fiction...so there we go. Basically, I get so into my fanfiction that I become obsessed! It's debatable as to how healthy that is, lol. And another one: Personal issues: a few weeks ago my father walked out my mum...yeah, I know, that's shit. Turns out he has been having an affair, even worse! This is a man I trusted, a man I love and he has trashed everything I thought I knew about him. But on TOP of that I am also at home looking after my mother, she has been having serious heart issues which have had her in and out of hospital...then of course, we have no money so we are having to rely on friends and family just to eat. :/ Then on top of it ALL, the real icing on the shit pile that is my life at the moment, I have to be referred to a specialist to be tested for Adult Autism. Woopdy doo. So yeah, it's all fun and games in the mysterious world of Kimmimaru! Lastly: This sounds minor but it pisses me off; E-mail spam! ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG! Hate it. :/ They get your hopes up by telling you you have mail then dash them all with some crappy dating site... Anyways, thanks for reading...I hope to see you around.

I can't write Vincent in any kind of relationship...God knows why...although I suspect it has a lot to do with the fact that he is eternally obsessed with Lucretia. But Sephi is my One Winged Angel. I wuv him. Lol. He's just the perfect bad guy, and I can totally understand why he wants to destroy the planet, who wouldn't after what they'd done to him? (I have the feeling this thread has derailed...lol)

I've written quite a few fics in FF7 but I tend to concentrate on Cloud and Sephiroth, mainly because Cloud is the main character and Sephiroth is just fucking cool. (I have an obsession with Sephi, a fan-crush if you will, lol) I wrote a whole trilogy based around the original game, Crisis Core and Advent Children and even added my own 'afetrwards' bit...But I wrote them so long ago that when I read back I can't help but think; Wtf? That's horrible! Lol. Almost no punctuation, just full stops every five seconds. However, I got quite a few really lovely reviews from it so the story-line must have been ok. I also began writing about Sephi as a kid...after lots and lots of research into characters and storylines etc I managed to come up with a couple of chapters then stopped for some reason. Gravitation was what got me into Fanfiction, I wrote a couple of pretty terrible fanfics on FF.Net then stopped, then went back to it and came up with a couple ok ones...I have written two fics (Well one and a half as I can't seem to finish the rest.) which is a very excellent idea but I may have to re-write it as the structure isn't too good.

I'm reading the manga and so far I'm up to date, by that I mean I've just finished reading 'A piggy Party' chapter. (Don't know far along the anime is or even if you mean the anime or Manga...I forget most of the chapter names, lol.) I love Bleach but I couldn't write Fanfic on it, not without doing serious research, also my chosen fandoms tend to go around in circles. At the moment my main obsession is Harry Potter, concentrating on Marauder era...maybe one day I shall grow bored of that and move on. It's the same with Naruto. I have written Fanfic for Black Butler and Gravitation however, even if it was a while ago I wrote it. Oh and FF7, I have a tonne of FF7 fanfic on my Fanfiction . Net profile. That's another thing I am obsessed with. Love it. I'd die without it. lol. I'll have a read of one of your fanfics when I have time, I am currently concentrating on writing atm tho.

As to the top/bottom, Dom/sub thing...well, yes. People are unfortunately pig-headed about that and perhaps always will be. (I hope not.) But I'm with you on that, though I will say that sometimes, for the sub, it's about giving up that constant control they keep in the rest of their lives, letting someone else do as they will and just following. ^Oh yes, that is definately a huge part of it...I was just trying to explain it from the point of view of my Trolls. Trying to show that Sirius being a Bottom/Sub or whatever doesn't mean he's totally giving up his power. Lol! I just read through your whole response, its random. I am reading Bleach but I admit to never having read any fanfic on it, perhaps I should start? It must be so easy to write Urahara as humorous I mean in canon he has me in stitches. Perhaps we should gather all immature preteen trolls (I truly believe that these are the types who are trolling me, I mean just their outlook on life shows they have little to no experience) and set fire to them, we could have a party. Lol. I am so glad you enjoy my writing, it makes me feel a million times better that at least one person does.

(Just realised, I am SHIT at working this forum! Lol. I keep getting lost!) Thank you for the advice, I shall take it to heart. I won't give up, as I have said earlier, my rants tend to be 'heat of the moment' things and I tend to be dramatic and stroppy with them but afterwards, once I have calmed down, I find it much easier to deal with and think about it rationally. Your comments have really cheered me up however, thanks.

I'm sorry it upset you. I just feel that sometimes I need to rant and it helps me relax (weirdly enough), I also find it is a good way to review my feelings as if I was reviewing a story, I can look at it objectively once I have written it down if you understand what I mean? I realise now, after writing all that, that it's stupid to give up just because of one or two haters, I think this is just something I needed to air, like dirty laundry. If the reviews had been genuine concrit I could have handled it, because it's cold and impersonal, I find that much easier to deal with than outright abuse. I have been called a C**t (I hate that word, won't even type it), been told that I should kill myself and that I am a terrible person, I think I have enough emotional baggage to deal with without having people be that personal. I appreciate the support, honestly I do. Even if it does come from strangers, it's strangers who will more than likely have gone through the same thing and will have a much better understanding of the situation than my own friends and family. Thank you.

First off, thank you for being honest, I like honesty and appreciate it. Secondly, I don't think you're being harsh, nor will I take it the wrong way. I can handle concrit, if someone says; 'You can make it work better if you do so and so' or 'I didn't like this bit because...' that's fine. In fact that's what I WANT. It's why I like reviews. However, the kinds of reviews I have been getting are more along the lines of; 'Your stories shit.' with no reasons why, and 'You suck go die' (That's a popular one). I also have had people critising my characterisation based on the fact that I have one character bottoming, and this seems to offend their childish sensibilities. I am NOT using Dyslexia as an excuse for posting bad work, I am simply saying that If i make a mistake then more than likely I have not realised it is there because I am dyslexic. If anything having Dyslexia makes me more careful, if more nervous, about my mistakes. People tend not to sympathise with you unless you point out your problem, I have been called thick for not being able to spell things...which is far from the truth, I suppose I have just set up an automatic defense system where I feel the need to warn people so that I can avoid that situation. Then of course you have my personal problems to take into account, I think (after some retrospect after posting this) that it has made me emotionally vulnerable and things are getting to me more than usual. Like I said, normally it wouldn't bother me and I would ignore anything that is meant to be offensive, it never used to bother me, it's only recently that it's been affecting me. Mostly this post was simply to allow me to let off steam, to get rid of my frustrations and try to order my thoughts, re-evaluate my feelings on the matter and generally have a good bitch and whine, lol. As I said previously, now i have had a chance to think and have cleared my head, I doubt I will give up...I can't stop myself from writing as it's an obsession. Call it a 'heat of the moment' thing... Thank you for the advice, support etc.