Confessions


Ginevra
 Share

Recommended Posts

We all have our faults or flaws. What lies behind your mask? What is your biggest character flaw?

My besetting sin is hubris.

"Hubris: Excessive pride displayed by a character, at times taking the form of a boastful challenge to the gods or other higher powers--often resulting in harsh punishment."

Source: http://fajardo-acosta.com/worldlit/glossary.htm

When my mother warned me I would probably end up supporting my first husband in an attempt to dissuade me from marrying him, I replied:

"I am fully capable of supporting myself and a family."

So I wound up with a husband who wouldn't keep a job, lied to me as a habit, cheated on me, and threatened to leave me when our son was deathly ill with an undiagnosed illness. Fortunately, I was capable of supporting my family...just barely. I filed for divorce and moved myself and my sick baby out.

I'm still supporting my family...barely. My new husband is handicapped, but he works his tail off trying to help. He would work full time if he could. And he has held the same part time job since well before I met him.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Wow. That's a tough lot in life you've had to face.

One of my biggest problems is being too terse and short worded for most (leads to almost instant misunderstanding), and some other stuff that I can't get into right now....as I'm on my way to work.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest The Lurker

My biggest sin would have to be

That I downright refuse to get help for a medical issue. I tried before but nothing helped.

I've dealt with it for nine or ten years now, without medications.

I hate the doctor so my biggest sin would tie into I Hate going to the doctor and put it off unless I am almost dying.

sighs and gives Ginevra a hug. If you ever want to talk I am here.

You want me to go bite your ex's legs off?????? I will... devil.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

For me, it is that when I get angry at someone I will not hold back with my tongue or fingers or something do not get in my way, let me cool off on my own.

My mom knows that all too well, I hit the wrong button on my computer at the time being the year 1993 and I didn't know how to restore what I did and I started to get very angry and started to bang my chair on the floor, she came to stop me from doing that. My hands went from the chair to my mom's throat and started to strangle her. Yes, I did that. It took a punch to the head from my younger brother to get my hands to unlock and my dad couldn't even pull them off of my mom's throat. Needless to say, when they see that I am angry, they let me have a wide berth till I am cooled off before asking me what was wrong.

Beth

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I hate the doctor so my biggest sin would tie into I Hate going to the doctor and put it off unless I am almost dying.

sighs and gives Ginevra a hug. If you ever want to talk I am here.

You want me to go bite your ex's legs off?????? I will...  devil.gif

Well...I warn you to take better care of yourself. That may very well have been my ex's besetting sin. I appreciate the offer, but it's no longer necessary...

He never was one to take good care of himself. After I divorced him and we both remarried, his new wife had a horrible pregnancy where she was in and out of the hospital. Under all that stress, I guess his health deteriorated. He was obese, diabetic, and he used to have seizures when we were dating, but as far as anyone knew he'd had none for years.

In the end, he was found on the side of the road, dead. It was the middle of summer and he'd been riding a bike home from a job interview because he'd lost his job while his wife was in the hospital and his car was repossessed. The autopsy said it was a seizure, complicated by his obesity.

Of all the times we argued about him staying out all night and refusing to let me know where he was or when he was coming home...I don't know how many times I worried about just that. That he would have a seizure at the wrong time and place. I really was more worried about that at the time than whether or not he was fooling around.

He left a young widow, ten years my junior, a month old baby girl, and my then five year old son behind. Yes. I did wish the bastard dead...But not at that price.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have no problems.

Well, except once a month when I go slightly insane (or so they say)

And no, I'm not a werewolf.

Yes. I did wish the bastard dead...But not at that price.

This statement puzzles me.

I have cursed people before, and found my curse going awry onto the nearest innocent victim. I have learned to be careful of where I direct my ire. I once hated my husband as well. I cursed him, and he was hurt, but so was our car (which was still both of ours at the time.) I re-thought my strategy. Later, much time passed by, and someone at work stole from us and left a mess of paperwork for me, and although I did not curse that person, I did have a great deal of ire for him, and I later found out that his step-daughter was badly injured by a dog. How could I rejoice in the pain he felt over that?

How does one learn to love? It is a puzzle to me that people like that deserve and get love.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am a witch and I most carefully...most decidedly...did not curse him. I know better.

People did love him, whether or not he was worthy of it. His marriage was too new for his widow to have seen him the way I learned to. He'd been "saved" at his father's church about 2 weeks beforehand. I don't know if it was sincere, or a ploy to curry favor with his father when he was in desperate need of help. He was capable of either. Anyway, it gave his family some comfort.

My son was five and it was his first experience with death. His father was a better weekend Dad than he was as a live in father. My son loved him and was devastated and confused. And angry. Very angry. He's seeing a counselor.

The ex's relationship with his father was always rocky. I think he was convinced his father didn't care much for him and he was resentful. He was also wrong. His father was hit hard by the loss. And hurt even more when the young widow cut ties and took the grand-baby out of his reach. She also has a daughter my son's age and they had gotten close. He still asks for her and has only seen his baby sister a few times.

It was also frightening to me until we found out the cause of death. A man should not just drop dead at the age of twenty nine. I was afraid it might be some undiagnosed health condition--perhaps one my son or his baby sister could inherit.

No. I wished him dead. Out of my life permanently. He was like a cancerous growth that needed to be cut out of my life. But, I didn't lift a finger (or athame) to do it. I don't cast if I can't control myself. If mere wishful thinking was enough, then I'm much more powerful than anyone has a right to believe, me included. That, indeed, would be hubris.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't really have but a few things wrong with me. (shockingly enough)

I won't allow myself to vomit. I have it stuck in my head that it is the worst thing the human body can do so therefor I don't do it. I could feel like I'm going to be sick but my mental block keeps me from it.

That's the only thing I can think of right now .... hmm I shall have to think this one over!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 1 month later...

I'm so sorry... I'm not married and have never been, but I recently got pregnant and the father ditched me so I'm working hard too. You're a strong person.

My biggest flaw would be my hatred for myself.

My face, my hair, my hands, everything. I never really care about what happens to me. (But I'm pregnant now, so I force myself to do things for the sake of the baby).

But people have the ability to change things. You did. Things are better, right?

So eventually, your mind will right itself.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have cursed people before, and found my curse going awry onto the nearest innocent victim. I have learned to be careful of where I direct my ire. I once hated my husband as well. I cursed him, and he was hurt, but so was our car (which was still both of ours at the time.) I re-thought my strategy. Later, much time passed by, and someone at work stole from us and left a mess of paperwork for me, and although I did not curse that person, I did have a great deal of ire for him, and I later found out that his step-daughter was badly injured by a dog. How could I rejoice in the pain he felt over that?

Cursing . . . that's tricky business right there. I hope you can benefit from my own experience and listen to a friendly word of advice. Just don't do it. Ever. For any reason. If it works you will regret it. Forever.

Not that I ever "cursed" anyone with a spell or anything. But one time I met someone in passing and they pissed me off. Bad. I was very, very angry. Angry was a new feeling for me at the time (you can thank a man for that) and I was just getting used to it. I think, not being used to handling such an emotion, I went a little bit crazy. It only took a moment. Just one moment and I never really thought about it again. I wished for something really bad and really specific to happen to that person. I didn't know that it would come true. Things like that don't happen in real life, right?

Karma has a weird way of fucking with me when I do something wrong. Through a series of misfortunes in my life, I met this person again. I really, honestly didn't remember at first. It took me a while to figure it out. Trust me, if you knew what it was you would know it wasn't some freak coincidence. It happened. And the timing was right, it happened when I wished it. And trust me, that person will never be the same. Nor will I. I will never be the same.

So please, anyone reading this, never wish anything bad upon anyone. Ever. Don't even think it. And especially don't wish for it.

And that would have to be my greatest sin. My biggest flaw would be when I get angry or scarred, strange things start to happen. That's why I try to remain as emotionless as possible. Which is why I write. My characters feel the emotions I lock away and all my pain, despair, and helplessness is channeled through them.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Rosemarius

My biggest flaw...mmh...oh, I know!

I can't stand physical contact with relatives strangers, or with persons I barely know! I often withdraw from the other's touches even if they mean no harm...I don't know why, but it upsets me to be touched when I don't even know the other persons, and that may be ok, but the weird thing is that also being touched by a relative upsets me, and I really don't know why. General displays of affect makes me feel unconfortable.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

My biggest flaw is appearing to be arrogant. I'm not actually but everyone seems to get the impression I am because I'm generally quiet but will defend my opinions to the death. And because I can generally out-debate people in my classes and don't really have friends in my school, I'm labelled as an arrogant bitch. I just have my own friends from other places.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

My biggest flaw would probably be Obsessiveness...

Whether with a fetish of mine or a person, once I get hooked then that is all I can think about constantly. wink.gif

Yay I am not the only one! Weee....

Well I have OCD when it comes to certain things or at least I could say that I am a perfectionist I want everything to be perfect I am obsessed with it and that's a big down fall. Trying to be perfect can make you go crazy or possible insane.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 3 weeks later...

Hmm, where to start? I'm OCD-obsessive when it comes to writing -- the characters in my head start to talk and it's bye-bye-birdie till I've managed to scribble out a chapter or two. I'm also rather guilty of arrogance and pride, taking on more than I can handle, and suffering from the not-so-occassional bout of self-consciousness. All in all, makes for an interesting combo...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 1 month later...

Shoot... I'm almost afraid to answer this considering all that I've found out about my self with some of the other topics....

Let's take a look at the seven original sins....

Lust

Gluttony

Greed

Sloth

Wrath

Envy

Pride

Well... I'm very lustful... desiring just about everything around me

I love my food and even when I'm not hungry I'll probably be munching on something

I am very money oriented seeking jobs and career that can get me rolling in the dough... though I have most recently tamed that... just because my fiancé may become rich... go figure...

I can be VERY lazy doing nothing all day if I could... sleep and eat... that's it and I'll be happy...

I am VERY vengeful and find any way to seek it against those who have done me wrong even if it takes 5 - 10 years... And I won't hold back from a verbal fight if it comes down to it...

And I am perhaps one of the most prideful people you may ever meet. Even when I know I am wrong I refuse to step down from a fight... I'll even try and convince you that the sky is actually PURPLE if that's what I thought... it's bad....

I'm obsessive, stubborn, a little too sexual at times, always forever bashing myself about lack of talent, looks, personality, anything....

I'll curse like a sailor just because...

And I'm very much OCD... If it's not done a certain way I get a little on the edge...

I feel bad...

Here's the thing though... I'm very considerate of other people taking their feelings and needs and placing it above mine.

I'll also bend over backwards for you just to try and keep you happy...

Even if I don't have the money I'll still find a way to try and take you out to get some fresh air and have some fun to forget about whatever is bothering you...

When it comes to animals and people who really need help I have all the time in the world and patience beyond that of any one you may know... sticking with you till the problem is done and socializing the animal so it can live a happy life...

I share my food with others when they don't have anything unless I know you ate something before and you're expecting me to stil share... that's when I'll attack for my food...

I'll give strangers money because I truly feel they have a need for it more than I do...

I'll go to extremes to help out organizations and fellow peers ignoring my own duties and responsibilities just to help them out...

I'm very polite and can actually be apart of higher society without any ever guessing I wasn't born into it...

I bite my tongue when the situation calls for me to remain calm...

And I donno....

I might tap into all the sins and then some... but I really am a good person.... I swear...

Oh damn it...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have no problems.

Well, except once a month when I go slightly insane (or so they say)

And no, I'm not a werewolf.

This statement puzzles me.

I have cursed people before, and found my curse going awry onto the nearest innocent victim. I have learned to be careful of where I direct my ire. I once hated my husband as well. I cursed him, and he was hurt, but so was our car (which was still both of ours at the time.) I re-thought my strategy. Later, much time passed by, and someone at work stole from us and left a mess of paperwork for me, and although I did not curse that person, I did have a great deal of ire for him, and I later found out that his step-daughter was badly injured by a dog. How could I rejoice in the pain he felt over that?

How does one learn to love? It is a puzzle to me that people like that deserve and get love.

It is wrong to curse ANYONE! Because a curse will follow back to you and nip you in the butt. And why love is given to people you think don't deserve it is puzzeling yes, but everyone deserves love no matter what, God loves all of his children, good or bad. You should learn to forgive rather than curse a person's sin, because they will get their punishments in due time, it is not at your interests when and where it will happen for you are not God. That is God's job to worry about, not yours, just forgive and forget and move on in your life without worry. The thing is... revenge or cursing someone won't bring justice, it will just bring more pain and trouble and not resolve anything! Be careful what you wish on people, because it WILL come back to you ten fold.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm so sorry... I'm not married and have never been, but I recently got pregnant and the father ditched me so I'm working hard too. You're a strong person.

My biggest flaw would be my hatred for myself.

My face, my hair, my hands, everything. I never really care about what happens to me. (But I'm pregnant now, so I force myself to do things for the sake of the baby).

But people have the ability to change things. You did. Things are better, right?

So eventually, your mind will right itself.

I wish you luck and blessings to you and your unborn child. You made the right choice for the sake of your baby. You should also get help and apply for welfare and medicaid for you and your child which will help you pay for the expenses that you might not be able to cover. You will get through this if you just have faith and you work hard, don't doubt or that will just set you back instead of pushing you forward. Have faith that God will take care of you and he will. ^_^ If you need to ask questions or help on this you can always PM me or IM me (my AIM name is on my profile), I'm here for ya.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am a witch and I most carefully...most decidedly...did not curse him. I know better.

No. I wished him dead. Out of my life permanently. He was like a cancerous growth that needed to be cut out of my life. But, I didn't lift a finger (or athame) to do it. I don't cast if I can't control myself. If mere wishful thinking was enough, then I'm much more powerful than anyone has a right to believe, me included. That, indeed, would be hubris.

That's an awful thing to have wished for. -__- And because of being a witch, it could have something to do with what you wished upon him but I can't be sure about that. Your reason for it, thinking you might be more powerful than you think, I don't know about that, just how you went about the whole problem only made it worse and end badly. Demons have their ways on doing things when around people who have negative thoughts and actions on others. This will give them all the more reason to cause harm/problems on you for your sins. Believe me or not, I know all to well on how things work when it comes to demons and how they work. You should really be careful on your actions and what you wish for on others, because they most likely will come true.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

One of my biggest sins, I believe, is Envy. Part of it may be that I was brought up in an environment where anyone who was successful or "rich" should be disregarded as a good human being and thought badly of. I am also constantly comparing myself to others, in looks, traits, and especially natural talent. Anyone with a natural talent in anything will generally drive me up a wall, but I've come leaps and in bounds in ways of controlling that and not being nasty or trying to punish them for "being better than me."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

That's an awful thing to have wished for. -__- And because of being a witch, it could have something to do with what you wished upon him but I can't be sure about that. Your reason for it, thinking you might be more powerful than you think, I don't know about that, just how you went about the whole problem only made it worse and end badly. Demons have their ways on doing things when around people who have negative thoughts and actions on others. This will give them all the more reason to cause harm/problems on you for your sins. Believe me or not, I know all to well on how things work when it comes to demons and how they work. You should really be careful on your actions and what you wish for on others, because they most likely will come true.

When I started this topic, I used the term "sin" figuratively. As a pagan and practicing witch, I believe neither in demons nor in "sin" in the biblical sense. And truthfully, I am much more concerned with the theology and connection to the Greater All of the universe than I am in spells and charms and such. But I have taken the time to learn the theory and practice of magic.

Actually, within my own religious creed, had I wished to seek retribution on him, I would have been fully justified. I don't care to discuss some of the things he did to me, which were not solely confined to lying and adultery. But we had a young child and he had a family. So I did nothing. I even footed the bill for the "amicable" divorce, made sure all the bills were paid when I left, coordinated my leaving with him moving in roommates to help pay for the apartment, and demanded a ridiculously small child support payment. I was far kinder than he deserved. I turned a lot more cheeks than most Christian folks I know have would have done.

My opinion is that it was his own karma coming home to roost. He needed no help from me in that respect.

Or if you want to go with the Christian interpretation...He was "saved" and God called him "home."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

When I started this topic, I used the term "sin" figuratively. As a pagan and practicing witch, I believe neither in demons nor in "sin" in the biblical sense. And truthfully, I am much more concerned with the theology and connection to the Greater All of the universe than I am in spells and charms and such. But I have taken the time to learn the theory and practice of magic.

Actually, within my own religious creed, had I wished to seek retribution on him, I would have been fully justified. I don't care to discuss some of the things he did to me, which were not solely confined to lying and adultery. But we had a young child and he had a family. So I did nothing. I even footed the bill for the "amicable" divorce, made sure all the bills were paid when I left, coordinated my leaving with him moving in roommates to help pay for the apartment, and demanded a ridiculously small child support payment. I was far kinder than he deserved. I turned a lot more cheeks than most Christian folks I know have would have done.

My opinion is that it was his own karma coming home to roost. He needed no help from me in that respect.

Or if you want to go with the Christian interpretation...He was "saved" and God called him "home."

You may not believe in demons, but that doesn't hide the fact that they exist (from experience). I'm sorry about what happened to you and your child, sorry if I came out harsh to you, I wasn't trying to; and I don't have a problem with witches either, I have many friends that are one.

True that most Christians don't turn the other cheek or are as kind as you have been as you state (has some so called "christians" like that in the family) but so are many others in other religions and also one's who don't. People are just mean and not merciful to others or even care! Most of my family are like that... even emotionless! How I'm from them? I have no idea because I'm hardly like them! But yeah... you can put it into the whole karma thing, I call it... "You reap what you sow."

And just cause he was saved and is "christian" doesn't mean he had the right to do such things to you and your child, nor to his other child and widowed wife and others he has hurt. People make mistakes and I don't think God would see what he did was christian and how HE would deal about your dead man is none of my business. It is none of my business how the guy treated you and I do hope you and your child is living a better life without him, it's just, your thoughts on the matter seemed cruel and that the guy ended up dying and you seemingly feel relieved about it shocks me. Also, sense you didn't give me all the information, you shouldn't be offended when I respond to the information you gave me.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

lust makes me do crazy things...
Lust makes ANYONE do crazy things! XD

I know it has with me... >_>; ::coughs::

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share