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Review responses for "The Cartooniverse Mother-Daughter Crossover Sextacular"


GeorgeGlass

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  • 4 months later...

From thebogeyman on January 24, 2021

First of all, thank you SO much for writing this story’s first archive review! 

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Well written, and although I'm not familiar with all the characters, you seem to have captured the different personalities of the ones I do know perfectly.

Thank you! That’s always my top priority when writing fanfic.

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Can't wait to see who wins and why.

Not to be overconfident, but I think you’re going to like it. :)

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From Fairy-Slayer on January 25, 2021

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Chapter 2

The kissing was a great start, but now it's really getting hot.

 

I do love to escalate. 

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The stripteases (at least the ones that happened) were fantastic, and I love how you were able to describe something that visual and erotic so wonderfully and at just the right pace for the action.

Thank you! Writing "The Miss Cutie Patootie Pageant" gave me a lot of experience in describing dance performances in detail. The level of difficulty is slightly higher here because each performance involves two dancers instead of one, so I'm happy to know that it's working for you.

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The added insight to the behind-the-scenes conflicts was pretty terrific too, with Rita confronting (however timidly) Lola about her methods, and of course more of Helen's internal struggle to… well, not get ahead of herself I guess. :) And even though it got Team Daring disqualified, Riley's freak-out was a pretty great performance on its own.

That part was fun to write. I also liked that it gave me the chance to throw in a few more fandoms that I otherwise wouldn't have been sure how to include (Transformers especially).

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Cute to see Judy still struggling to develop a rapport with Daria… and even cuter of Daria to push some uncomfortable buttons.

I suppose their "relentlessly cheery cheerleader versus gloomy Goth" interplay is a cartoon trope for a reason.:)

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Anyway, I hope Planet Express made their next delivery on time, and that Zoidberg didn't insist on pointing out the "chocolate" theme of the run that day.

Aw, dude. I guess I had that coming. :)

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Though more so, I hope Ralph helped Vanellope wax her floor during the intermission. :)

If there are size queens, I guess there can be a size princess. :)

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Thanks for more of this wacky sexy fun.

Thanks for the alpha-ing, beta-ing, and review!
 

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  • 2 months later...
  • 2 weeks later...

From Fairy-Slayer on April 19, 2021

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(Chapter 3)

First of all, it was great to see Lola get her comeuppance in such a fun way, and I have to wonder if the score wasn't 0 because the judges saw her humping the fire hose. 

 

Team Loud got a 4.5 because the act up to that point was pretty hot, and because the judges liked the creativity of the three-way dildo. 

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(As for the glass, people don't always stop to read directions when they're on fire, plus IRL it probably draws more attention than just shouting.) Also, the aside that Timmy Turner may be responsible for all of this was cute, though I suppose he could have meant just being able to get in.

You know, I never even thought about the possibility that the contest was the result of Timmy's wish. But it couldn't be, really, because it's been going on for decades. Timmy's wish was just to be there. 

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Helen's utter decompensation into full-on sexual abuse was pretty gripping, both good and bad. It's not hard to imagine that many in the audience actually were more titillated by the rough non-con. 

Or at least dubcon. The uncertainty was probably even more titillating.

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It's also pretty telling that she didn't have much concern for Violet's feelings but only for getting a good score while also scoring again. 

Yeah, this is a pretty dark version of Helen. Mainly inspired by all that Helen-as-futa r34 porn out there.

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It's even more shocking because you write in so much extra detail for that pair, that I've been assuming that they were destined to win – so it's a great change-up and throws some extra seriousness into the competition. 

Super powers are no guarantee of success. But they're in the lead, so who knows?

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It'll be interesting to see how things play out in the final chapter, but I can't imagine if their home life will ever be the same.

Indeed it will not.

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Regardless, it was all very sexy and fun, even what little time Lola and Rita had onstage. 

Thank you!

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Real-time X-ray was a pretty spectacular trick, 

Jomahawk gets the credit for that one. He suggested it when he did his beta-read of this chapter.

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and more amazing Violet could get the right level even under unexpectedly more-stressful conditions. Lois and Meg were fun, but even funnier when we saw just how literally anal-retentive Lois can be. :)

Just wanted to throw a little slapstick in there.

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For me though, Isabella and Vivian's time was the pure, sweet winner for the cuteness, happiness, and love that makes it all so much better. Maybe it's because we can get inside the minds and see some of what's happened behind the scenes, but they really seem to have the most love and joy of any contestants, a true togetherness.

I had to have one non-dysfunctional mother-daughter pair make it to the finals. :)

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Thanks for more sexy fun and even more for the added drama.

Thanks for the review!

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From Fabian on April 23, 2021

Hello, Mr. Glass!

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I'm Fabian and I've been a fan of your work for quite some time, though this is the first review I've decided to write.

Hello, Fabian! Even though this is your first review, I feel like I’ve seen your name before, although I don’t know where. But  I’m pretty sure it’s not just from Laverne and Shirley. :)

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Of the many, many online writers I've found over the years (who dabble in a certain kind of erotica) you are by far one of the most talented and prolific.

Your skill never ceases to impress me, and I find myself visiting this site on a semi-regular basis almost exclusively to read your work (as many of the other writers I like have sadly stopped posting).

Thank you! I would be interested to know what other AFF authors you like.

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What amazes me is not only your ability to construct an energetic and titillating scene of unbridled passion, but also your ability to make me laugh. Your talent for subtle humor (and subtlety in general) is incredibly rare and, to be honest, a breath of fresh air.

When it comes to cartoon fanfics, I feel that humor is an essential component. Most cartoons are comedies, which means that you can’t be true to the source material without including at least some humor.

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I must have read a thousand vignettes, short stories, poems and assorted works in my time, but tales such as Rated F: A Phineas and Ferb Sex Comedy or The Miss Cutie Patootie Pageant are easily some of the best of them all.

Thanks! I’m very proud of both of those stories.

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Which brings me to Cartooniverse Mother-Daughter Crossover Sextacular:

What a fun romp this is turning out to be! I genuinely love the pageant/competition formula and I'm overjoyed that you didn't waste a single opportunity for a hilarious cameo. I felt so much nostalgia each and every time someone from an old 90s cartoon or Pixar film would show up to comment on the events unfolding on stage. You captured their personalities wonderfully and I truly feel that they would indeed say the things they said, even in these unbelievable circumstances.

I really appreciate that. Some of the credit goes to my two betas, Jomahawk and Fairy Slayer. The main reason why I recruited the two of them was to help me do justice to any cartoons that I felt were iconic enough that they had to be referenced but that I’m not overly familiar with myself (eg, Fairly OddParents).

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To add to that, your mastery of tone is something to behold. Few writers, in my experience, can tell a story that involves the kinds of things Helen did to Violet without it feeling like something out of Game of Thrones or Black Mirror. But somehow, someway, you manage to reel it in and keep it light and fun.

I think interspersing the action on stage with commentary from the audience helps. Starfire shouting, “I, too, enjoy the sex of the butt!” was on my bucket list of things I want to include in a fanfic. :)

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These are two-dimensional cartoon characters after all (except the Parr family, which Helen hilariously pointed out).

Glad you liked that bit. It’s one of my favorites.

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I'm really enjoying this story so far, and I'm excited for it's conclusion.

Thank you! I hope the final chapter will live up to your expectations.

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Thank you for all that you've done, Mr. Glass. I'll try to write more reviews in the future, if for no other reason than to show my appreciation for your work.

I would love that. Thank you!

-- Fabian

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PS - If you'll forgive me, I think I may have spotted a possible continuity error in chapter three? When Isabella and Vivian take the stage, there's a moment when Isabella pulls off her white teddy-top. After the Powerpuff girls have their humorous exchange, Isabella is then described as rubbing herself "through the diaphanous fabric of her teddy-top."

Just thought I would point it out! Looking forward to chapter four!

Whoops. I will go fix that. Thank you!

Edited by GeorgeGlass
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  • 2 months later...

Author notes (SPOILERS)

The idea for this story came to me after someone on Lolicit asked everyone what their favorite incest pairing was: father/daughter, brother/sister, etc. I didn't actually know which one I liked best, so I decided to make a list of all the incest stories I've ever written to see which pairing came up most often. In doing so, I discovered that although I had written plenty of father/daughter and brother/sister stories, and even a couple of brother/brother and father/son stories, I had written almost no mother/daughter stories. That discovery, combined with an item in my list of story ideas that simply read "Some kind of cartoon crossover," led me to start writing this fic.

Seventy-five different fandoms (ie, cartoons and cartoon franchises) are referenced in this story. They are all listed in the disclaimer at the start of chapter 1.

This is the first story for which I've ever had two betas (not counting one or two stories where the original beta had to bow out and I recruited a second one). I did this because the story covers so many fandoms -- including a few that I am not especially familiar with (eg, Fairly OddParents, My Little Pony) -- that I felt like I needed all the help I could get to make sure all the characters’ speech and behavior seemed authentic. In fact, Jomahawk and Fairy Slayer served as both alpha and beta readers, because I bounced ideas and a preliminary draft of chapter 1 off of them before I began writing in earnest, and during the writing, I contacted them a few more times to solicit ideas.

All of the US states from which the characters hail are canon except for Metroville (home of the Incredibles) being in Kansas, because Metroville has no canonical location. I wanted to give it one, though, so as not to ruin the running joke from The Simpsons about no one ever saying what state Springfield is in. Given that Metroville is based in part on Metropolis, Kansas seemed like a reasonable choice of state.

If this story were an actual cartoon, voice actress Grey Griffin would have a fair amount to do, as she is the voice of both Riley Daring and Lola Loud on their respective series.

Mammelli,” the endearment that Vivian Garcia-Shapiro uses with Isabella in chapter 2, is a made-up portmanteau of the Yiddish mammelle and the Spanish mami. (Interestingly, both words are diminutive terms for “mother” but are used with daughters and other loved ones, too.) Likewise, yingelija, which Vivian uses in chapter 4, is a mashup of yingel (Yiddish for "cute little one") and hija (Spanish for "daughter"), and dybbuquito is a portmanteau of dybbuk (Hebrew for “devil”) and the Spanish suffix “-ito” for “little.”

I included a cameo for Jessica Rabbit for two reasons. First, she was a favorite of fan artists for a long time -- long before the phrase "Rule 34" was coined. Second, how could I write a big cartoon-crossover story without referencing Who Framed Roger Rabbit -- the biggest cartoon-crossover movie ever made?

The dog-fucking event is a reference to the enormous number of male canine cartoon characters out there.

The bit in chapter 4 about the 1980s version of Glimmer, “whose body seemed to have been poured from the same mold as She-Ra’s,” is a reference to the fact that the toy versions of both She-Ra and Glimmer (and most of the other female characters from the '80s She-Ra cartoon) were made with the same mold to reduce manufacturing costs.

In the dog-fucking competition, the contestants are given twenty minutes to get it on with the dogs. Fairy Slayer noted that when he had his text-to-speech program read him the chapter, the time that elapses between Johnny Bravo saying, “On your marks, get set, fuck!” and “Ladies and, uh, dogs, your time is up!” is twenty minutes and one second.

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Guest Star Wars player 1

Hello it’s me again, I just wanted to say hello and let you know that I’m going to review the final chapter of the ‘Cartoon Mom and Daughter Crossover’ which is how I can say the title without it being too long to type :) So first off, I loved how you had Kim possible and Shego have a sexy clothes ripping fight for entertainment I thought that was hot and a nice prelude to the finale :) Moving on to the finale, I was wondering what the final event would be and isebella gave me an idea of what it could be when she spoke to her mom before the event :) the announcement of the event caught me by surprise but left me very excited because I know from past stories that you are an expert in this type of event : sex with dogs :) I thought it was really hot because not only is it with actual dogs but since they are dogs they do their natural position doggy style which I’m a huge fan of :) I thought it was really hot when Vivian and Isebella were kissing each other while they had sex with their dogs and I found it very hot especially when Vivian was having sex :) I also liked how Meg was having hard sex with both Mamaduke and scooby do, I thought that was really hot, so then when the winner was announced I was a bit surprised but not disappointed, I won’t actually say the winners name in case anyone who hasn’t read the story yet is spoilers :) so in conclusion I thought this was a really great and hot end to this very great story you have made, I also liked the part where Helen suggest that violet may be pregnant, I wonder how that happened :) anyway, hope you’re doing well, good luck with your stories and hope you have a good night, bye and good night :) 

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From Fairy-Slayer on July 10, 2021
 

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(Chapter 4)

That event certainly was a surprise, but even just the choice of dogs was a ton of fun.

Thanks! There are so many male canines in the Cartooniverse, it was hard to narrow it down to just six.

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I love the irony of wanting to take points for Lois because Meg's glorious berserker-fucking of Marmaduke and Scooby senseless completely stole the show. I mean, sometimes knowing when to just stay out of the way is the critical element.

Part of the point there was just to show that the judging is not an objective thing, and what some judges consider a strength of a performance, others consider a weakness.

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And, heh, I never knew Scooby was such a… er, dog. ;)

That was chiefly inspired by r34 art I’ve seen of Scooby with various other cartoon dogs.

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Isabella and Brain were an adorable pairing, and probably the most-perfect combination: Besides Brain's sexual experiences with Penny, he's always managed to be kind while also being super-proactive, plus all the strength and endurance he's built up over the years. It seemed to parallel with Vivian being so sweet with Gromit's first time too.

I put Brain and Gromit together because I think are very much cut from the same cloth: Unable to speak, but smarter than they ought to be.

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As for Gromit's appreciation of Vivian's and Isabella's harmonizing sexual vocalizations, Phineas and Ferb should gather up the Fireside girls and see what they can do with that. :D (Maybe Jeremy can inadvertently get Candace to help too.)

Well, I think I know what they’re going to do today. :)

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Poor Helen couldn't catch a break, but in a way I think she'd way overspent all her sexual tension during the previous competition. Even with the best dog she'd never be able to get into it after her grand performance with Violet.

That’s probably true. She’d already shot her wad, as it were.

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(But to be fair… Odie? ;) )

C’mon, I had to have some comic relief in there. 

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Also, sucks for Violet that her and Dudley's moment was drowned out (kind-of literally) with Helen's screw up. Though compared to fuckery her mother will continue to put her through, it's pretty minor. (Poor Violet though, fucked over in every way possible… and therefore a potential collaboration with another writer I know? :D )

Hmmm, I think I could see it.

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Especially for such a complex story with so many references, you did a great job keeping the flow going so I could enjoy every bit of sexiness and fun. Thanks again.

Thank you, both for all your help and for the review!

Edited by GeorgeGlass
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17 hours ago, Guest Star Wars player 1 said:

Hello it’s me again, I just wanted to say hello and let you know that I’m going to review the final chapter of the ‘Cartoon Mom and Daughter Crossover’ which is how I can say the title without it being too long to type :) 

No worries, I tend to just refer to it as “Cartooniverse.”

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So first off, I loved how you had Kim possible and Shego have a sexy clothes ripping fight for entertainment I thought that was hot and a nice prelude to the finale :) 

 

I didn’t watch Kim Possible until somewhat recently, when I semi-binged the series on Disney+. I was struck by just how overtly sexy Kim is. Add to that the sheer amount of r34 art of her that exists, and I felt like I had to give her a decent-sized part to play in this story. 

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Moving on to the finale, I was wondering what the final event would be and isebella gave me an idea of what it could be when she spoke to her mom before the event :) the announcement of the event caught me by surprise but left me very excited because I know from past stories that you are an expert in this type of event : sex with dogs :) I thought it was really hot because not only is it with actual dogs but since they are dogs they do their natural position doggy style which I’m a huge fan of :) 

You and me both. The fact that there are so many male cartoon dogs made this the perfect opportunity to indulge my bestiality fetish. :)

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I thought it was really hot when Vivian and Isebella were kissing each other while they had sex with their dogs and I found it very hot especially when Vivian was having sex :) 

 

From the beginning, my feeling about Vivian and Isabella was that they would show better teamwork than some of the other mother-daughter pairs. Not least because teamwork is kind of what Isabella is all about.

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I also liked how Meg was having hard sex with both Mamaduke and scooby do, I thought that was really hot,

I had a lot of fun writing that part. Meg going completely bananas and dominating the performance was sort of my ace in the hole for Team Griffin.

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so then when the winner was announced I was a bit surprised but not disappointed, I won’t actually say the winners name in case anyone who hasn’t read the story yet is spoilers :) 

Thanks for that.

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so in conclusion I thought this was a really great and hot end to this very great story you have made, I also liked the part where Helen suggest that violet may be pregnant, I wonder how that happened :) 

:), indeed.

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anyway, hope you’re doing well, good luck with your stories and hope you have a good night, bye and good night :) 

Thank you, and thanks for the review!

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From InvidiaRed on July 11, 2021

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Scarily well researched.

Thanks! For those cartoons I wasn’t overly familiar with, I watched video snippets and, of course, consulted with my alpha/betas.

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You can believe that the toon verse is filled with a bunch of perverts haha

This is the foundational belief of most of my fanfic. :)

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From Dixie Freelove on October 12, 2021

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LOL I loveit!

Thanks!

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The mommy daughter stuff is really fun! The surprise event was really cool!

I loved writing all the mother/daughter stuff. It took me a while to figure out what to do for the surprise event, but once I did, I had a ball with it.

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  • 1 year later...

@Yahegai

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This story is still as amazing as the first time I read it

The Lilo, Nani and Stitch cameo made the already intricately well done complex yet simple story even better

 

Thank you! Those characters (deservedly) get so much rule-34 love that I felt the need to include them in some way, even if they didn’t qualify to participate in the contest.

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