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Review responses for "Enter the Sandboy"


GeorgeGlass

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From YamiNoKami on September 07, 2019

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And then there were four with Lynn up next.

Hint: Good guess about Lynn, but I wouldn't go making too many assumptions about the numbers. 

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I was surprised at this chapter since I figured Lincoln would be to ashamed to ask Lisa for help and that she would pay him a night time visit too.

Well, he very nearly was too ashamed, but he was also desperate for answers.

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But I was really surprise with Lisa going all the way with Lincoln since I figured she would use other means to pleasure him since he was hypnotized and all. 

As she said, Lincoln's nocturnal shenanigans have affected everyone in the house, herself included.

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Still now I can't help but wonder if Lisa had something to do with the nightmares and her siblings taboo late night acts. Hell will she be the reason in the possible sequel of why girls outside the family will want a taste of Lincoln too? Will she try it first with her friend Darcy?

And will the twins and Lucy want to go all the way with Lincoln too since chances are they probably don't want to fall behind their little sister Lisa. And will this story end with a sibling sleep together in which Lisa hypnotizes Linc again and unleashes his inner sex monster?

 

You ask many questions that all have the same answer: No spoilers. *evil cackle*

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From Fairy-Slayer on September 07, 2019

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Much as I loved the wonderfully rough & needy sex between Lisa and Lincoln, this whole chapter seems kind of weird to me.

It's certainly a departure from everything that came before. 

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At times I had suspected that Lisa may be involved with the genesis of Lincoln's "problem," and a few things she mentioned could be evidence of that: She mentioned that she started making sex toys for herself about the time that all of this started: perhaps she was affected by the erotic noises but not by whatever is causing the initiating nightmares; 

Remember that in chapter 1, Lana came to Lincoln's room because Lisa was already in their parents' room, having also had a nightmare.

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but her comments suggest that she was preparing for sexual intercourse with Lincoln right from the start. 

Or else the events of night 1 made her as horny as they did some of her sisters.

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More so, she seemed pretty pleased (even a bit blasé) to have released Lincoln's "sex monster" facet, without any need for suitable dream girls to get his motor running out of control.

Well, who wouldn't be pleased? :)

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Still, I'm sure that once the Freddie and Daphne rip off those Jordan and Ronnie Anne masks* Velma will explain it all perfectly. 

If it hadn't been for those meddling kids...

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It just seems like a very hard shift from the usual pattern. 

Indeed.

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There's still a hint of the hard physical torture having something to do with it… and with the weekend we'll see if that affects the cycle further.

Most of all, the hot action and sweet sexy preteen mystery is still very enjoyable. Lisa's asides about how often she hypnotizes him, "collecting samples," etc. all fit nicely too. Also cool to reinforce the idea that the nightmares are real and create a bit of clingy behavior in the first place. It makes for a very fun mystery along the way, especially since most of the clues involve hot sex scenes. So thanks for more sexy fun with the Loud kids.

Thanks for your comments!

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* “Moonbeam and Eclipse!”

Dem wascally wabbits!

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On 9/8/2019 at 8:58 PM, GeorgeGlass said:

Remember that in chapter 1, Lana came to Lincoln's room because Lisa was already in their parents' room, having also had a nightmare.

Ah, I'd forgotten that Lincoln was Lana's second choice that night. (Heck, I can't even remember the names of characters in a movie while I'm still watching it!) Oh man, Lynn Sr. could have been in for quite a shock otherwise!

Now I have to wonder what Lisa's nightmare was about. Maybe she dreamt there was a crazed Sex Monster in the house and it was trying to get her! …but over the next few days she kind'a warmed up to the idea. :)

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3 minutes ago, FairySlayer said:

Now I have to wonder what Lisa's nightmare was about.

As Lana described it, “Something about robots, and artificial intelligence, and…singularity…I didn’t really get it.”

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Maybe she dreamt there was a crazed Sex Monster in the house and it was trying to get her! …but over the next few days she kind'a warmed up to the idea. :)

I believe you’re thinking of “The Loud House After Dark.” :)

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D'OH! You'd have thought that after the first time I'd have gone back to that part before saying anything else, but Noooooo…

Oddly enough, as I've been overdosing on podcasts the past few days, someone mentioned that for all our fears about the technological singularity it turns out that the political singularity is already in full swing. Personally, I'd rather deal with the AI's robots because at least they'd end me quickly.

As for LHAD, I think that one deserves another read (or listen) while I await the next chapter. :D Thanks again.

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From Fairy-Slayer on September 17, 2019

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(Chapter 6)

First off, I'm very relieved that Clyde wasn't involved with the sexy part of the dreams, though I guess we don't know if the "monster" was just trying to get him out of the way or if it will want to experiment. 

 

Wow, you just made that nightmare so much scarier. :)

In all seriousness, I do feel like I've given Clyde short shrift in my Loud House stories to date. In fact, I don't think he's ever even appeared in person in any of them; at best, he's a voice on the walkie-talkie. Which is why I'm incubating a plan to write a Clyde-centric story one of these days (working title, "Clydeborg: The Six Million Dollar Ladies' Man").

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(I guess you could say, “When it comes to Clyde it left itself an opening … or two!” LUAN! GET OUT OF MY COMMENT!)

We all have our Inner Luan to bear. 

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On the other hand, it was nice to see Paige joining the dream team, 

Expanding Lincoln's dream-harem is fun. :)

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and even more fun to have Lynn take on the real-life version. Kind of funny that Lincoln's fumbling in the morning was more from not having "the monster" to help him than any residual hesitance to commit incest... so much incest... 

There will be a bit of discussion of this shift in the next chapter.

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Also it's great that Lynn was up for seconds since, with her enthusiasm, he'll have a chance to work on all his moves which he's only mastered subconsciously so far – and I'm guessing that will be pretty important for any other sisters besides Lisa who start making a habit out of their brother's cock. (Surely those facts are more clues too.)

Possibly...

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Thanks yet again.

Same to you!

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  • 2 weeks later...
Guest Star Wars player 1

Hi, it’s me, I just wanted to say hi and ask how you are doing. I also wanted to let you know that I’ve just read chapter 7 of ‘Enter the Sandboy’ and I really loved it, I especially loved the part where Lincoln takes turns with Luna and Leni, anyway, hope you’re doing well and also, one question, how are you doing with that story about a guy who meets a woman who has a daughter who becomes interested in their sex activities ? Also, does it have a title yet? Let me know when you have the time, anyway, hope you’re doing well, good luck with your stories, and hope to hear from you again soon, bye and have a good night.

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19 hours ago, Guest Star Wars player 1 said:

Hi, it’s me, I just wanted to say hi and ask how you are doing. I also wanted to let you know that I’ve just read chapter 7 of ‘Enter the Sandboy’ and I really loved it, I especially loved the part where Lincoln takes turns with Luna and Leni,

Hey there. I’m doing well, and I’m glad you liked the chapter.

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anyway, hope you’re doing well and also, one question, how are you doing with that story about a guy who meets a woman who has a daughter who becomes interested in their sex activities ? Also, does it have a title yet? Let me know when you have the time, anyway, hope you’re doing well, good luck with your stories, and hope to hear from you again soon, bye and have a good night.

That story is tentatively titled “For the Price of One,” and it’s coming right along. In fact, it’s probably the next chaptered story that I’ll start posting once I finish with a couple of the current ones. 

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From Fairy-Slayer on September 26, 2019

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Heh, one has to wonder if you were influenced by those oh-so many (requested) pictures of Leni and Luna kissing Lincoln on the cheek from either side. 

Nope; didn't even know that was a thing. My head remains firmly planted in the sand. 

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Regardless, it's nice to know that even with the source of the nightmares identified that the fun will keep on happening. (Also have to love the idea that banging leads to… well, banging.) 

Dang it, I didn't even think of that! (Hmmm, is it too late to work that into Luan's dialogue?)

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It'll be interesting to see what Luan is planning, though maybe Leni and Luna agreed to help speed up the jokester's turn precisely because they didn't want her coming up with anything special that would make Lincoln suffer.

Poor, poor Lincoln...

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Anyway, Leni is so cute with her sweet naïveté and cute way of finding a kind answer even when she doesn't understand, though the idea of her in a three-way with Luna and Lincoln then schlicking off to them going at it is pretty great too. 

Writing Leni is fun, because you get to make dumb jokes but you also get to exploit her utter sweetness. Plus, she's a cutie.

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That being said, Lincoln's little reactions to the idea that there's now a schedule and whatnot is fun too; and I was half-expecting his concerns about Rita to be answered with, “She gets every-other Sunday.”

No spoilers!

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Adding in a bit of a lesson about what Awake-Lincoln's problems were made for a nice transition as he figured out the right beats to make some beautiful music with Luna. (Besides, she's the most-likely to give it to him straight if it had been a lackluster performance, both because of her matter-of-fact style and the fact that she has more options.)

True that.

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Of course, even if the pipes are no longer calling, 

Oh, Linky Boy...

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there's still the issue of what created this Sex Monster embodiment of Lincoln's desires — and why Lincoln wants to give it credit for the lessons that Dream Jordan, Dream Ronnie Anne, and Dream Paige had been teaching him. (Yes, it's all Lincoln in reality... but if he ever has a personality-split like in Superman III then things could get real awkward real fast.  )

Or super fun.

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It'll be fun to see what else is revealed as Lincoln "makes everything okay" for his remaining sister (or sisters?).

What did I say about spoilers!?

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Thanks for another great chapter of how the Loud children are making the hot weather seem chill by comparison.

:)

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Guest StoryLover

I can't even find words to praise your fanfic. It is written with incredible talent and true to the characters, yet incredibly arousing (doesn't make me a pervert does it?). Hoping to check out some of your other works. Keep up the good work , and looking forward to Chapter 8 !! 

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1 hour ago, Guest StoryLover said:

I can't even find words to praise your fanfic. It is written with incredible talent and true to the characters, yet incredibly arousing

Thank you! Those are the things that matter most to me in writing a story.

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(doesn't make me a pervert does it?)

I’m pretty sure I’m not in a position to decide who is or is not a pervert. :)

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Hoping to check out some of your other works. Keep up the good work , and looking forward to Chapter 8 !! 

Thanks! Chapter 8 is coming soon.

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From Fairy-Slayer on October 03, 2019

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(chapter 8)

It was quite a surprise to see Lily getting in on the action so directly, perhaps proving the title of that infamous lemon fanfic... 

 

I wanted to spring it on the reader that sweet, preverbal, seemingly innocent Lily is as big a horndog as any of her sisters. 

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Great job describing how Lily treated her brother without using the word suckling and risking making it creepy  – yet still planting the idea that Rita is a bit of a freak too. Guess we know where the kids get it from. Also, revealing the flashback and Lily's offer of future relief was pretty funny too.*

:)

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Letting Luan's vulnerability show and play a bit, plus her resisting a joke at the end, was pretty touching (“Heh!”) and added some warmth to their forbidden incestuous liaison. 

After going full freakstyle with Lily, I wanted some "get real" time. And who better to get real with than the last character you'd think capable of it?

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Going monster-to-monster (“Talk about bumping nasties!”) was a cute way to offer a solution to Luan's hesitation. 

And get around the whole "Luan jokes throughout the whole thing and Lincoln's boner flatlines" problem.

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Despite being a straightforward chapter it still had all the charm and lust as the other chapters. Yet apparently there is a lot more to come than expected! Thanks for more sexy and very Loud fun.

You're welcome. And yes, a couple more chapters of fun to come.

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* Though we're only taking Luan's word that she can understand Lily and didn't just train her with sweets and/or or a free pass on April Fools Day. (I'm guessing that was mentioned in an episode sometime after I stopped watching.)

In the season 1 episode "Homespun," the kids take turns telling stories about their house, and Lily tells one while Luan interprets. 

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From Fairy-Slayer on October 03, 2019

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Ah, so the truth is that Rita and Lynn Sr. are super carriers of the freak gene,

Yup. Which makes their kids superfreaks. :)

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though now I must wonder if all of the kids really did inherit the trait or if the pair was just so horny that they had to get their kids into it too. Maybe that doesn't matter because everyone in the Loud House is happy now either way. Glad to hear that Dad gets to enjoy the family pastime... thought I kind-of expected that to be the reveal for the final chapter, so now I'm wondering what last trick you have up your sleeve.

Not that much, actually. Except for one thing that some readers have been waiting for.

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<salt quantity="1 grain">

Oddly enough Rita's behavior in this chapter fits in very well with my personal (and apparently completely unique) opinion that Rita Loud is a bad mother, so she's more in-character here than most would think. After all, she got Lincoln all revved up to the point where no boy could stop before mentioning the possibility of pregnancy – which she didn't have to lay on him at all – just to amp up the wrongness of it all so she'd have a better orgasm.; Yet if she did get pregnant by him there's no need – or even easy way – for Lincoln to know it was his. That's too much to lay on a boy, never mind that if she didn't just let everyone, including all the kids, think it was Lynn Senior's then that's a terrible risk to the future of any such baby. (Of course she could actually just have been lying, but Lincoln will probably still have a panic attack or two once he has enough blood in his upper head to ponder the possibility.)

(…or maybe I'm just reading way too much into it. :) )
</salt>

 

Yes. Yes, you are. :)

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Anyway, story-wise it's a lot more fun to know that it's a house full of horndogs where the fun will never stop. Heck, if anything, the final chapter will probably make it even more awesome. Thanks.

I hope it will. Thanks for the review!

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From Pixel-King on October 13, 2019

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What a bunch of freaky fun.

Thanks. :)

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The pregnancy risk definitely ups the thrill, especially to the baser instincts.

I had a little internal debate about whether to include that element. But since this is the second to last chapter, I figured it was time to turn the amp up to 11.

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It is weird, but I always feel like adding the father is a step too far, at least in these kind of harem-esque family stories, though in general daddy/daughter is good as a focus for other plots. Latent subconscious Oedipus issue of mine I guess.

I totally hear you; I debated about that, too. The main reason I did it was that it just didn't make sense to include everyone in the family but him, especially with 11 females in need of dick.

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Though I am curious just how many V-cards Lincoln claimed, since Lori got his. I have to imagine Lynn Sr. snagged a few? And now the race is on for Lucy, the Twins, and Lily (Lisa was as precocious as ever, lol).

Lynn Sr hasn't taken any of the girls' virginities. Because he's been at work until midnight almost every night since this began, he hasn't become involved in the action until now. Lori is the first of his daughters that he's had sex with.

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This seems like a nice lead in for the karmakaze picture set where an older Lincoln is "servicing" all his siblings, and a few other girls, and Ronnie Ann asks how he is able to keep up. The last image is of Rita complaining that his stamina is too low if he can only last 10 rounds. What a slave driver!

Ah, yes, I've seen those. Naturally. :)

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Fairy-Slayer is right, Rita is a bad mom. A very naughty mommy, who needs some "punishment" in fact.

Mmm, I'll bet some proper smacks would make that big butt of hers jiggle nicely.

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(And if we are lucky enough to get an Epilogue maybe some Father/Son bonding, just to cover all the bases, is in order? If lesbian play is fine then why not? After all, what's good for the goose is good for the gander!)

Yeah, but that's not really my thing. I write m/m stuff occasionally, but mostly with furry characters.

Thanks for the review!

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Author notes (Warning: SPOILERS)

Lynn Senior’s murmured comment to the central air conditioner—“You hear me, baby? Hold together”—is what Han Solo says to the Millennium Falcon in The Empire Strikes Back.

The zebra in Lola’s nightmare is a nod to Phineas and Ferb, in which Candace sometimes sees a talking zebra in her dreams.

Lynn’s nightmare about an evil baseball team wearing clown makeup was inspired by the 1970s street gang film The Warriors, in which one of the gangs wears baseball uniforms and face paint and carries bats.

The bit about a badly ventilated pipe making a banging noise when the water is running is a real thing, which I experienced at my parents’ old house.

(Warning: TMI) Lincoln’s sleep-sex is inspired by a few events from my own life. I once woke up to find myself making out with my wife, who’d had no idea that I was asleep when I initiated it. According to her, I’ve done a few other things like that, which I was not aware of at the time.

Four square and pickleball are both real games.

According to the internet, perennial ryegrass is a recommended lawn grass for the northern U.S. It is said to be hardy and able to endure a lot of foot traffic, which makes it ideal for the Loud family’s yard.

During a typical night of sleep, we go through multiple REM cycles, and each one includes a larger proportion of REM sleep than the previous one. As a result, you spend more time dreaming later in the night than you do soon after you fall asleep. This is why only some of the girls were affected by the sound of the hose pipe each night, whereas many of them were affected by the sex sounds made by Lincoln and his bed companions, which always happened later in the night (at least until the hose pipe mystery was solved).

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From Fairy-Slayer on October 20, 2019

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How appropriate that Lana should take it in The End for the final chapter. :)

You are utterly devoid of shame. :)

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The rain returning after Lincoln has some great guilt-free sex the first time was a nice metaphor too, not least of all for all the wetness in his future.

The rain seemed necessary for a fully happy ending.

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The nicer mood in the morning bathroom line was a sweet touch as well. Nice to know Lola is ready to fully accept her royal scepter, and cool that Lucy would want to roleplay some long-suffering yet very loving wife for him.

Gotta give 'em credit for knowing what they want. :)

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However the cutest bit of all was Lana's revelation that the intimacy was most-important to her. It makes for a very lovely high note to leave on; knowing that the Loud kids will be having plenty of sexy fun is great too.

Yes, the Louds now have a way to show their love besides duck, dodge, push, and shove.

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Now I just wonder if Lincoln will save that tidbit about Luan's collection to use when he needs an edge on her... or even suggest they go through it together.

I think it's going to be pretty educational for all the Loud kids. 

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BTW Knowing your love for Phineas and Ferb I had no doubt who the zebra was.

But of course.

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Heh, the whole thing started with "hose" and "pipe" issues and that turns out to be the solution too.

:)

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Thanks for another fantastically fun and sexy tale.

Thanks for all the nice reviews!

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From Someone on October 21, 2019

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Great scenes and story

Thanks!

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I realize this is meant to be the final chapter but if you were to make a oneshot or even sequel (fingers crossed) Could you make it about one now normal day in the house where we see in detail how Lincoln "survives" his family? (maybe a difference between the weekend and a school day, or even a family trip?) Just a thought

I'm actually planning a full-length sequel, which will be set a couple of months later at the start of the school year. Chapter 1 will show what life in the Loud House has become since the events of "Enter the Sandboy."

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Anyway good luck to you and your future stories

Thank you, and thanks for the comments!

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