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JayDee's (Naruto) review reply, story discussion and additional notes thread


JayDee

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I have completed the first draft of flashfic Naruto the Cluck from this challenge thread and will need a discussion thread to link on the story when I post it in case I ever get a review. Oh, quit laughing. So here is the discussion thread (it’s also useful to divert any further discussion away from the challenges board). I have seen that the Naruto fandom is a harsh and unforving one, hard on technical accuracy, but then so was LOTR and I never got any abuse for that one (now, the D&D Drow fans? they were understandibly annoyed, but at least they didn’t see the first draft where the Drow referred to puppers and doggos.)

 

 

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Naruto the Cluck has been reviewed!

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BronxWench

::applauds::

This is probably the first and only time I will leave a review in this subdomain, and it is most definitely the only time I will ever enjoy a cuckolding story in this subdomain. I won't even begin to tell you how much fun it was to see you tackle all three prompt words and use them with such nonchalant ease. It took me right back the the second quarter of 2011, and the Thirteen Words from Hell.

But seriously, the alliteration! The hyperbole! The sheer brilliance of Naruto's dialogue! You are a master of the flash fic, and I bow before you in humble awe. Well done!

Thank you for your review!

I totally missed a lot of the prompts back then so it’s nice to re-visit some of the open-ended time limit ones and to be honest acrolith really helped with deciding how to turn Naruto into a chicken, what with not knowing any in universe reason. Definitely easier than those bloody second quarter 2011 words  :) I don’t want to blow my own trumpet, but I’m pretty sure Naruto’s dialogue was pretty much the best I have ever written for any character. I will never better it. Sigh.

Thank you again for the review! I can imagine someone reading the story, reading the review and then going “Wait, what? This story?” :P

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Another review for Naruto the Cluck, and by extrordinary coincidence it’s the same as the one I got on Tinder –

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LordOfLust

I'm sickened, but curious.

Thank you for your review, I really appreciate the feedback! This feels like a fairly common response to encountering one of my stories and, for this story at least, I urge you to follow your curiousity and see how it goes! Thanks again.

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Naruto the Cluck – I’ve had a review from Pippychick, who did her own twisted take on the prompt words here, if you haven’t read and reviewed it go ahead. It’s drabble length so it’ll take you around 5 minutes to read, 5 minutes to realise you’re going to wake at about 3am and remember it, and about 5 more to write a review how great the tone of horror is!

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pippychick

Well, I always leave Naruto until last, then when I saw your name come up it was like Christmas had come early. I love the alliteration, but: “Now my dear husband is a big black cock...” started me off giggling. “Clucking husband” got a proper belly laugh from me.

Excellent use of the prompts; now I see 'anal' inserted in there, it makes perfect sense. You're so wicked, but wonderful, and I think you made my sunday morning. Brilliant!

Thank you for your review!

It’s not the first time I’ve had anal insertion in a story, to be sure. Abasement was actually the harder one to work in with it being a generally upbeat consensual scene. I pretty much decided to make an unintentional, and frankly unlikely, anal penetration just so that I could use that triple A combo of alliteration. Later I realised I could have just used the terms to describe Naruto’s condition. I think I like it better when the prompt words actually prompt story elements rather than just deciding “I am going to write this, how should I work them in.” Quite a few of mine have been the “just work it in” variety, of course :)

I once saw someone say they didn’t enjoy cuckold stories if there wasn’t a big black cock involved, I hope I didn’t mis-understand.

I really appreciate the review, thank you again, and I hope that the rest of your Sunday is good! It’s been pissing it down here so all I’ve been doing is working on the last part of An Actor Abducted, thanks to BronxWench’s review effectively nudging me concentrate more on thinking about how little the character Gabrielle wants to be there, and also, probably unintentionally, making me think about throwing in a bit of the old gore.

Onto a tangent, which is more me thinking out loud rather than responding to the review – I nearly started another post for it, and then realised there wasn’t much point :)

When I looked at the fic after seeing the review, I was surprised to see nearly 4800+ hits already. Given such a large hit count this story got in a short period (rather more than, say Twinpregnation has got in a longer period), I’m half tempted to try looking properly into the fandom to see if there’s enough characters to make it worth using it as the setting for one of my last remaining re-writes. I am something of a reader whore… And I mean, it seems like these folks are hungry for content. One of the re-writes I’ve been leaving until the end has six adult female characters in it, which puts it beyond of a lot of fandoms (the original was a story exchange, I’d heard of maybe one of them for the request, so at least it fits in with doing it as a Naruto re-write...) Are there six adult female characters who could be tricked into being rendered suitably helpless in some vaguely canon manner for the kind of sweaty interracial experience that leads to walking funny for a few days? I’d start a thread and ask, but frankly I am slightly scared by he kind of answers it might generate. Maybe I’d be better doing it as a Final Fantasy re-write because a) I know some of the games and b) another subdomain slot filled…

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  • 6 months later...

Naruto the Cluck goes past 10000 hits and gets a 4th review. Holy shit that must be an active subdomain.

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ANON

I think it would be better if the tranformation was irreversible. 

Thanks for your comment, I appreciate you taking the time! You may be right – I honestly don’t know enough about the fandom and hard to see how it could be worse. Permenantly fowl Naruto’s downside would be that Hinata might have to explain where he was the rest of the time she wasn’t screwing around. Also, lets face it, someone might eat him. And she’d have to do whatever chores he was picking up before! I dunno though, could be something I’m missing. Thanks again for the comment.

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