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JayDee's (Dragon Ball) Review Reply, story discussion and additional notes thread


JayDee

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I thought I might have an anime1 thread already I could re-use on the quiet, but, no, apparantly not. I’ve never even heard of Beyblade. I thought it might be something that got whipped out during creative disagreements in Destiny’s Child. Should I ever write any more D B stories this thread would be for the review replies/discussion points on those too. “Android 18 gets Windows 10” would probably not be a big draw though.

So here is a Dragon Ball thread for replying to any reviews I receive on my shortly to be uploaded story Frying Pan. I think it may even technically be a re-upload, but if I did have it on AFF for a bit in 2008 I don’t remember when/why I took it down. As the writer who ate a box of crayons and shat out Flaying Solo, Taking the Sky from Kaylee and Ohio Vanilla it can’t have been a question of content, good taste or quality. The forum it was originally written to be pasted on is long gone, and googling hasn’t found a copy loaded elsewhere so looks like it’ll be an AFFO.

I set out to check for typos (Somehow 2008 JD failed to spot writing “pained” for “painted”) and have currently added over 1000 words to the original. Whether this makes it better or worse I dunno. Pan is aged 20 in it, there was fanart of her drawn as a pretty muscular adult I saw at the time but there is no way in hell I am going to try searching for adult fanart of Pan on the modern internet. Especially because without more modifiers I’d be looking at a whole lot of goat penis. Maybe even too much. 

Anyway, I will hopefully have the story loaded tomorrow or Tuesday after another flick through for typos. There will be a link to this very thread. Should I get no reviews this thread will be about as useful as an anatomy textbook at a soft vore convention.

Edit: Just over a week later than intended due to unexpected stuff. Now loaded.

Edited by JayDee
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  • 10 months later...

Frying Pan

Quote

reto90kid

hey can I be in the story

Sure, there’s always room for a spammer. You’re the guy masturbating in the background. Wow, look at you go, you’re spurtin’ like a fuckin’ fount- oh. ow. Shit, dude, it’s not supposed to have blood in it. You need to get that checked. Sooner rather than later I’d say. Thoughts and prayers.

Edited by JayDee
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  • 1 year later...
2 hours ago, Guest foxkidsboy97 said:

hey JayDee,

what happens next huh 

Do I meet the characters

All yours, @JayDee  Have fun playing with the been around since 2013 under far too many names to list (whoops) “new” meat.

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16 hours ago, Guest foxkidsboy97 said:

hey JayDee,

what happens next huh 

Do I meet the characters

You awake to find yourself in a forest clearing. Distantly, you can hear singing. It is pretty fucking tuneless. Oh fuck, it might be Bieber. To the east here’s a sign which reads “Quit looking East”, and to the West is a very suspicious tree stump.  If you choose to examine the previously unmentioned mudhole Go to 35. If you choose to win self-determination for the Republic of Molossia go to 63. If you want to know about the unsightly rash spreading across your buttocks go to 28 (Charges may apply).

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