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Review responses for "Splinter" [Steven Universe]


GeorgeGlass

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From SailorNemesis on May 27, 2018

Chap 6, sigh, boring happy ending.  Ah well.

*Spoilers below for events up to “Sadie Killer”*

Given that the story takes place before Lars ends up in space and Sadie quits the Big Donut, not ending it that way would have made the story incompatible with canon. And canon-compatibility is kind of a thing with me. However...

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From Harem-Lover-26 on May 29, 2018

You may need to do an alternate ending where the Splinter stays in control.

You know, I’ve never done an alternate ending for a story before, and I have to say, I’m intrigued by the idea. I will consider this.

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From Josgonzalez189 on July 18, 2018

Now this is how you end a story. Glad you took the time to make the chapter and I hope you have a good day. 

 

Thanks! I’m glad you enjoyed the alternate ending. 

I should be more open-minded about dark endings. They’re fun to write. :devil:

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From Lucius-Walker on August 26, 2019

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Holy shit...this is dark, creepy, and yet pretty fucking hot! I love it! 

Thank you!

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I do love how you wrote the good and bad ending. That way we can be satisfied with either one, but in the same time we won't be left to wonder about the alternative. It was a good move on your part to add the bad ending as well. 

Some readers expressed disappointment with the “happy” ending, and then it occurred to me that it would be really fun to write an alternate, dark ending. Maybe a little TOO fun. So I went for it. :) 

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Not enough Priyanka action in my opinion, but oh well. 

Steven had a lot of women to take care of in this story. And Priyanka had a fair amount of “off camera” work to do, being both the group’s only doctor and the owner of the home where they made their base.

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I especially love how in the end, it wasn't just the Splinter that influenced their actions. The fact that deep down some part of them were still in control just made it that much hotter! Nice.

I didn’t think it would be any fun if the Splinter just turned people into mindless automatons that did its bidding. Instead, I wanted them to be sinister versions of themselves, driven by every impulse that the Splinter could dredge up from their psyches to make them do what it wanted. That ended up being a lot of (twisted) fun to write, particularly Connie’s buried anger toward her mother and desire to see her punished and controlled.

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Happy Writing! 

Thanks! And thanks for the review!

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2 hours ago, Guest Bap said:

I just wanna say that this story broke me and now I can’t sleep. I hope you’re happy. :fear:

Not really, but given that the story is thoroughly tagged and starts with a warning describing it as “creepy and rapey,” I’m afraid you have no one to blame but yourself.

I’d suggest watching some old SU episodes to wash “Splinter” out of your head. Or reading my other SU story, “P.F.A.S. (Post-Fusion Attachment Syndrome),” which is pretty much the opposite of “Splinter.”

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Thanks for your response! I thought I could handle it, lol. I read rule 34 stuff from time to time, and I’ve also read creepypastas that were good, but nothing has gotten to me quite like this. I think it’s because it’s so well written. So keep writing things - you’re very good at it!

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13 hours ago, Guest Bap said:

Thanks for your response! I thought I could handle it, lol. I read rule 34 stuff from time to time, and I’ve also read creepypastas that were good, but nothing has gotten to me quite like this. I think it’s because it’s so well written. So keep writing things - you’re very good at it!

Thank you! 

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@Yahegai

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The ending was superb

The alternate ending was also superb

 

Thanks! I had never before written two endings for a story, but when someone suggested adding an alternate ending, I started to think about what a dark ending to the story would be like, and I really liked the ideas that came of that, so I went with them.

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