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A note to my boss


Shinju

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Dear Thug Co-worker,

I know you moonlight as a pimp, but please do not ask me again if I want to "sell my ass" out on the street for you for $300/hr. If you really make so much money with your little "side business," then wtf are you doing working at this shithole job in the first place?

Sincerely,

- Shinju

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  • 1 year later...

Dear Boss's, Boss's, Boss,

It's great that you have decided to move your desk out amongst us peons, but could you possibly keep the raucous cell phone calls about how much you enjoy your weekends abroard to a quieter volume, along with your loud jokes about your luxury car, your impossibly handsome PA and your current boyfriend's enermous dick? Or at least supply photos for comparison?

Sincerely,

JayDee

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  • 2 months later...

Dear Former Supervisor,

I hope you aren't still inviting groups of underage sales assistants in your department to check out the porn site with videos of you on it. Sure, it was an atmosphere of "oh, hey, check this out!," not "this video was practice for what I'm going to do to you." But there's a line between narcissism and sexual harassment, and I'm not really sure which side that was on.

Thanks,

Jyet

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  • 11 months later...

Boss,

Sell those pretty boys with long hair, they never seem to turn down sex or have a headaches, and they don't get pregnant! At least usually and mostly they work happily for beer and chips!

Bad Cal :rolleyes:

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  • 2 years later...

Dear Boss,

Please, please fire me. Fire me twice. Ask security to carry me out and deposit me on the curb. Cut up my keycard, take back my key to the executive bathroom and make me turn in the secret decoder ring. Just do what needs to be done. I can take it.

Wait.

Fuck.

I AM the boss, and I wrote myself a memo that I was not allowed to fire myself.

:cry:

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