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Review responses for "Tri-Date Area"


GeorgeGlass

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Jomahawk2694 2015-04-20 id # 3000070440

I'm glad to see this story finally seeing the light of day! Its a little on the shorter side, but I'm assuming you are going to make up for that later. Also, really glad to see you including Stacy, as she doesn't get nearly as much love from the fan community as she deserves. Great to be reading something new from you, and I can't wait for your next update :)

Joma




Yes, the first chapter is a bit short; the more "action"-oriented chapters will be considerably longer.


Totally agree about Stacy. That girl deserves some serious love, and she's going to get plenty in this story.


Thanks for being the first to review!

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Jomahawk2694 2015-04-30 id # 3000070458

Wait, one of Candace's plans actually worked? Not just worked, but worked in the most wonderful way possible? Call the military! Call the National Guard! Cats and dogs living together! Mass Hysteria!!

Believe me, she's as surprised as you are. And she's not at all sure that this initial success isn't the prelude to an epic crash and burn. More on that in later chapters.

But seriously, this chapter couldn't have been more wonderfully crafted, sexy, and downright teasing if it wanted to be. I think I'm safe in saying I wasn't the only one wishing Candace had gone with the "rip their clothing and go hog wild" thought that she had ;-)

Flaubert wrote that anticipation is the purest form of pleasure. And he had all kinds of venereal diseases, so he must have known what he was talking about. :)

Seriously can't wait for your next installment man :-)

Joma

You won't have to wait long; chapter 3 is nearly done.

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First, let me say how excited I am by the amount of attention that this story has gotten so far. And I'm please to tell you that there is quite a bit more to come.

Jomahawk2694 2015-05-02 id # 3000070463
Well, you should start posting a new warning with your stories. "Do not read in public, lest you suffer embarrassing arousal."

Yes, writing them in public poses similar risks. :)

This chapter was even better than the last, and the crazy thing is that Candace telling the truth instead of keeping a secret seems like the kind of thing that actually would work on the show. As always, keep up the amazing work, and update soon :-)
Joma

I feel like a cartoon fanfic ought to involve some cartoon logic. And thank you!

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Belfry 2015-05-02 id # 3000070464

Excellent! Your latest chapter showed perfectly the feelings of the main three characters. Lonely and heartbroken are two things that change people. I hope that if they do go further, then they show their feelings openly and honestly. That's the only way to make their tri-relationship work and last over time.

Thank you! The emotional underpinnings of this relationship are definitely an important aspect of the story. But remember that these are teenagers who aren't necessarily great at confronting or expressing their feelings, so it may take time for their emotions to come to the fore.

TheallmightyUltimix 2015-05-02 id # 3000070465

You magnificent bastard, that's the second time you've teased us for a sex scene! You realize that now you have to make the actual sex scene ten times more hot because of that, right?

Hey, this is a highly experimental relationship these characters are in--a few rockets are going to blow up on the launch pad before one makes it into orbit. But don't you worry. :)

some guy 2015-05-03 id # 3000070467

You do great work with the characters, especially Candice. Your stories feel like they would be an actual episode if the writers decided to go TV-MA.

Thanks! I consider this high praise, because to my way of thinking, the best fanfics are those that are completely faithful to the characters but explore them further by putting them in new situations.

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Saint_Wanker_Kris 2015-05-07 id # 3000070486

First of all, thanks for all the comments!

Finally, I have been expecting a story focused on this three for quite a long time, and the fact that *you* of all people decided to made one make this even better.

Is there an emoticon for blushing?

Oh, so that's how you're going to take it... I guess that it could be taken that way, that they had been supressing a mutual attraction toward each another simply because they both loved Candance way to much to hurt her like that.

I figured it was plausible, at least.

And while Candance plan sounds complicated, it isn't. It's quite simple, what isn't simple is how to hide it from the society and their friends, which is way more harder than anything else. Though, the Tri-State Area seems pretty open minded, they had to be to let children do what they do on that place without that much of a concern.

Lynda on the other hand... well, she's the one that worries me the most. While she's normally a great mother, she might be a problem in the future... but then, she had been show to be quite open minded and might give us a surprise there

.

Well, you now know what strategy they're using with Linda. We'll see how long it will work...

Well, that ascended quickly, I guess that the sexual tension is simply quite too much for them to deal with. Good job on including all of them on the mix, it's a quite well done scene, steamy too.

I do wonder if Stacy will soon discover that Suzie is a control freak when Jeremy is involved?

I'll be up front about this: Suzy does not figure into the story in any important way. I felt that I had "been there, done that" with "Little Blonde Monster," so I'm sort of willfully ignoring the potential for Suzy to interfere.

Also, I'm quite delighted that they show some restraint on the issue, Candance effectively doesn't have any luck, and she had been caught, many times unfairly. So the fact that they're still willing to be together but on a more secure place was a satisfactory change to what I expected to happen. As it goes more with the characters personalities that downright jumping at sex.

People sometimes complain that I take too long to get to the sex in my stories, but by and large, that's because I'm trying to make the characters behave in a way that I feel is true to them.

I guess that Phineas and other characters wouldn't be used on this story, for it would be quite convenient for Candance to ask for help, which they would gladly offer. THough, I don't see Candance approaching her brothers on the issue, especially as she doesn't want anyone at the moment to know about it.

Also, having them help the trio would take away the tension of being discovered that's always there, just because they aren't Phineas & Ferb.

Exactly. And now that things are starting to get steamier, she definitely wouldn't expose her little brothers to that.

Oh man, I got a good laught with this interlude, especially as I knew that it would end like that between them... though, I liked once again that they didn't ended up having "phone-sex". As it would have been quite cliché... and it would also add a possible fourth person to this trio.

Thanks! I wanted a little break from the action so that there could be both some comedy relief and an opportunity for Stacy to deal with her issues.

Laughed out loud with the solar powered dildo... Also, if this is the first interlude, would that mean that there's going to be others?

Yup!

I'm still wondering if you're going to put a antagonist on this story, cof-Suzie-cof... There's simply no chance that the girl wouldn't notice that Jeremy is giving her less attention than before now that he haves *two* girlfriends instead of one.

That's a valid point. I'm still not planning to involve Suzy in the plot, but maybe I'll find a reason why she's not trying to put squirrels in both Candace's and Stacy's pants.

Thanks again!

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Jomahawk2694 2015-05-07 id # 3000070495

Geeze, three teaser chapters in a row. If I didn't know any better, I'd say you were teasing the hell out of us on purpose. It was very well done however, as always, and I totally agree with Jenny, that Stacy should video and audio record her first complete time with her lovers, for her own (and Jeremy and Candace's) personal use.

Please update soon.

Joma

I'm just trying to escalate the action at a pace that seems realistic for the characters. As for recordings...well, that's between Stacy, her conscience, and her webcam. :)

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  • 2 weeks later...
TheallmightyUltimix 2015-05-21 id # 3000070548

Wow Candace, calling Vanessa a slut? That's not cool... It's probably true, but it's not cool.

No, it's not, and I kind of meant to imply that Candace realizes that. For one thing, she's in no position to judge (given her behavior in the story), and for another, I'd like to think that this experience is making her realize how pointless and narrow-minded such judgement is.

Arguably relevant story: One of the other sites where I post stories is Inkbunny, which has a feature that lets other users (besides the OP) suggest tags for stories and artwork. One of the stories I have posted there is "Learning a Daughter's Duty," which includes a female character who really enjoys sex, both with her husband and with various other male and female family members. (There is no incest taboo in their world.) When someone suggested the "slut" tag for the story, I found it surprisingly upsetting. I was all like, "She does what makes her happy, and in doing so, she makes other people happy, too. Why does there have to be name-calling?"

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  • 2 weeks later...
TheallmightyUltimix 2015-06-05 id # 3000070601

Oh my god, it was Isabella the whole time, that is HILARIOUS! I read this hours ago and I still laugh when I think about it.

I'm so glad. I don't remember exactly how the idea for this conversation came to me, but it was what made me decide to include Telephone Interludes in the story to provide some comic relief between the heavy action and drama of the chapters.

In any case, thank you!

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  • 5 weeks later...
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Big Brother 2015-11-27 id # 3000071079

Well, that's what I call an uncomfortable situation.

That's the whole idea. :)

Big Brother 2015-11-27 id # 3000071080

Candace's plan is going well so far.

Sort of inspired by the episode of Seinfeld in which George decides to start doing the opposite of everything he usually does.

Big Brother 2015-11-27 id # 3000071081

Chapter 4: Jenny is fun, haha.

Yup. :)

Big Brother 2015-11-27 id # 3000071082

Chapter 7: Vanessa gives good advice.

Well, she is kind of a slu...um, slumber-party enthusiast. :)

Big Brother 2015-11-27 id # 3000071083

Chapter 8: That was close.

In more ways than one!

Glad you're enjoying the story so far. More to come!

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unclefester84 2015-12-04 id # 3000071092

Great story, well written and a very nice idea well executed.

Thank you!

Just a request tho: could we possibly have a couple of bonus chapters, one showing Cadance's anal and one with Phineas and Isabella meeting after he actually climbs to her room after the radio 'man' suggestion. That would be lovely to tying up the last two loose ends.

I was a little concerned that some readers might consider the anal thing a tease, and it seems I was right. My main point in including it was to show that Candace and her friends still have territory to explore; they're once again trying a new kind of relationship, and, along with it, new ways of enjoying it.

In any case, I don't see myself adding to this story in the near future. I've got too many others to write!

Thanks for the review.

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Jomahawk2694 2015-12-04 id # 3000071093

You know, you are one of those rare authors who has the gift of goldilocks descriptions

Not too much detail that it overshadows the story, not so little that the reader wonders "what the hell is going on?"

Just the right amount of detail to paint a vivid, moving picture in the readers mind.

J.K. Rowling did it, Suzanne Collins did it, and you, good sir, do it every single time. This chapter especially, it was like I was there, not five feet away (as creepy as that sounds)

Wow. That's quite the compliment!

I do make an effort to try to keep the action moving forward and not to get bogged down in excessive description. I know this approach doesn't please everyone--Charles Dickens and Ann Rice have plenty of fans. But, maybe because I write a lot of fanfiction, I tend to try to pace stories as though they were movies or TV shows.

Oh, and the part at the end? Gold. Pure gold ;-)

Joma

So glad you liked it. If only I could remember where I got that idea... :)

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Jomahawk2694 2015-12-04 id # 3000071094

Very nice. I couldn't think of a better way for you to have ended this. (barring another really hot threesome ;-)

Can't wait to see what you do next!

Joma

Thanks! I almost didn't end the story that way; my original plan was to end it with the breakup and then Stacy and Candace resuming their friendship the way it had been before. But the fact that Phineas and Ferb itself is now over made me decide not to just restore the status quo, or to keep the three-way romance alive, but to end with the characters taking things in a new direction all together.

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  • 2 weeks later...
Guest hot shot

Wow awesome fic at first I wasn't sure about reading it but then I got more interesting specially how the character's starting to wrap them how their lives were in the beginning love every bit of it hope you make more of it or make more sequels of it I'll be keeping an eye out to see if you do make more keep up the great work

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Wow awesome fic at first I wasn't sure about reading it but then I got more interesting specially how the character's starting to wrap them how their lives were in the beginning love every bit of it hope you make more of it or make more sequels of it I'll be keeping an eye out to see if you do make more keep up the great work

Thanks! I'm not planning any sequels to this story, but I have more Phineas and Ferb stories in the works.

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  • 5 months later...
Saint_Wanker_Kris 2016-05-27 id # 3000071601

Adored the interludes, even if some of them killed the pace and the erotica at some points. Adored the one with Isabella pretending to be a boy giving sexual councels...

The telephone interludes were a bit of an experiment. I actually wrote Jeremy's first, then decided that I wanted to write one for each of the other main characters, too. As for the humor, I don't feel that a P&F story can go without it and still be true to the source material.

But also, despite the porn, what I loved the most where the situations and the dialogues that you put all over the story. I guffawed at the part when someone told his child to run from what he believed to be islamist, quite on point on the "Let's respect their culture and run the hell out of here!" You won me there...

Actually, I imagined that the mom thought the teens were "holy rollers"--evangelical Christians who go into a frenzy and roll on the floor when they are filled with the Holy Spirit. But the Islamist idea works, too.

The fact that you also made Linda aware of WHAT Candace is doing, and also approve it because she's less neurotic thanks to that is downright good. I love it when you made her perceptive but willing to accept or overlook some things so their children could be happy about it.

That was a last-minute idea. I went with it because (a) I thought it would be funny and (b) it keeps Linda from looking like a complete moron.

And what I loved the most, was that you explored the poli amori completely, it wasn't just Jeremy boning a suddenly bisexual Candace and Stacy, but also you gave Stacy and Jeremy and Stacy and Candace quite a lot of developing... I love that.

I really wanted the triangle to have three solid sides. Candace/Jeremy is a given, so I had to build up the other two relationships to bring them somewhere close to that level.

It was time for Candace to have a happy ending, she deserves it, in fact I think that she craves for it, which is why she's been so obsessed with busting her brothers who apparently not mattering what she did, won.

Yeah, I felt that if Candace had a big win somewhere in her life, her need to bust her brothers would become less urgent.

Thanks for the story, like always... it's quite fun to read ya.

And like always, thanks for the review!

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  • 4 years later...
11 hours ago, Maxsteele1986 said:

In chapter 7 Candance talks about stopping the Paisley Sideburn Brothers from breaking up like it was a big deal, then we hear nothing else on the topic in the rest of the story. What gives?

It was a throwaway line. Honestly, I never even thought to come back to it. 

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