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Phrasing is Important


Cuzosu

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I shared this conversation not too long ago in a PM, so I figured I'd post it here. If anyone else has experiences of this nature to share, by all means, toss them in here!

My grandpa-in-law is a muralist, a painter, and while he had known my family for years, he'd never seen my family really active at the same time. So when my dad and grandpa helped set up scaffolding for a mural, he had an epiphany. The next time he saw me, he felt the need to share it.

"You know, seeing your dad and grandpa together like that, I realized something. :think: Your dad, your grandpa, you, your whole paternal side of the family--you're all built like bulls."

I had to ask. "Oh, so you're calling me a cow?" :huh::shifty::whistle::angel:

It took him a moment to figure out where that one came from, like it came from left field or something. :rofl: "Yes, yes, that's it exactly." :thumbsup:

I just nodded. "Okay. Had to check." Like I was making sure he wasn't trying to be nice to me or anything. ;)

And this is just one reason I think phrasing is important: most females would not react well to being called a cow, even accidentally. He was lucky I knew what he meant; my paternal bloodline has really, really strong genetics and we tend to be sturdy, kind of stocky, with bodies that make hard work easier and broad shoulders that don't notice heavy loads as much as most. My dad and grandpa have, for most of my life, worn the exact same size clothes and shoes. Apart from obvious differences in age, they look like brothers. And I inherited the same kind of body structure, except as a female. So in that respect, I can understand why he inadvertently called me a cow; he meant it as an awed, admiring comment on just how much my family is built for hard/heavy work. Once he realized how his words could have offended, he (showing the remarkable acuity of humor my family considers delightful) played along. I like to think he took a lesson from it. At least he hasn't called me a cow again. :D

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Are any animal terms that are actually flattering to women? For men, being compared to a bull, an ox, or a horse is often a positive thing, but not so much for women. Gazelle, maybe?

And while I realize that "cow" is generally considered an insult, I definitely favor women with characteristics that could be considered...um...bovine.

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I'm not sure. I can't think of any off the top of my head. Well, maybe a feline of some sort, but that's a double-edged sword, because it's just as likely to be taken as calling them 'catty' and insinuating 'hissy fits' or some such.

LOL! No worries; my man actually said something similar. He told me that he was glad I wasn't a twig like so many women aspire to be these days; he'd be scared to break me.

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:D Cool. Always glad to inspire.

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  • 2 months later...

I have been likened to a wolf (which was fine by me) and a hyena (which is more of a scavenger and not so appealing, but my friends meant it as a comment on my constant cackling and laughter). *shrugs* My mother has the protective instincts of a mama bear with cubs, but call her that to her face and half the time she'll take it as a comment on her weight.

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