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Guest Alien Pirate Pixagi

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  • 2 months later...

these aren't my own reviews... but a friend of mine posted a team seven fic. and by team seven it means that naruto was with both sakura and sasuke, and it was very clearly stated in the summary that naruto was with them both. one review said, and i quote: "ewwww gros. this is disgusting. ur gross."

and the other said, and again i quote: "whoa so sasuke sakura and naruto r 3some?"

what's wrong with the intelligence of some of the readers these days? are they not paying attention to what's being listed in the summary? >_<

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  • 6 months later...

My latest flame!

fromScott Turner <SNIP@gmail.com>

to joandoe@gmail.com

date7 February 2009 21:34

subject I hope you're in prison

mailed-bygmail.com

hide details 21:34 (12 hours ago) Reply

Don't reply, I don't want to have a conversation with you. I just want to say that you should be behind bars, or buried.

Damn commies tryna take our freedom of expression away!

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My first flame I got about one year ago. The 'story' WAS a badfic, I have to admit, but then... how was I supposed to know it any better? The flame I found per incident after I had gotten many sugary reviews.

I don't have the flame any more.

After it, I almost gave up writing forever... almost. No, I won't, I love writing bad stuff too much. ;-)

One question remained, though: why did I have to learn it that way? Why didn't my friends and betas tell me earlier that my little scene was far from being logic?

Well, today I have gotten over it. If my muse ever comes back and I find the time I will write again.

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Dear scienceteacherSE,

We've recently learned from the fans in this fandom that you are being an inconsiderate @sswipe, completely disregarding the fandom's characters' canon characteristics (a.k.a In-Character personalities) and making your Mary-Sue out to be the f*cking wh*re that she is by voodooing these poor, defenseless characters into loving her and obeying her and just all-around making them so OUT-OF-CHARACTER. So much so, our eyes are bleeding and are intellectual minds have just suffered severe hemorrhaging, knocking us down a rung and bringing us horrifyingly closer to your stupidity level. Thanks to you, we now have to go through psychotherapy for the next six months in order to overcome this trauma.

We, the administrators of "Ghost's Writing Rules", highly suggest you f*cking stay out of this fandom until you've watched and/or read up more on these characters and their TRUE personalities before you EVER decide to THINK that you can write about them properly.

Sincerely yours,

The Basic Writing Skills Fanclub

Now this was one of the only flames I've ever received. From an 'Author' whose never published a single thing. Who keeps creating new identities so that he can continue to review people when he's been blocked by the author (this is on FanFic). Whose entire profile page is just flames to dozens of authors. Guy has no life.....

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BTW if you want to get a laugh, look at the guy's new profile: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1493267/Fatality_of_Mortality

For some strange reason he's changed his name, but not his tune. Doesn't even update his insults. (One of my readers who slammed him, has published a story, but he still claims that THEY haven't.... Makes him look stupid!) Oh, and notice that the majority of his 'favorited authors' are just like him. Flamers who haven't published a single thing!

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BTW if you want to get a laugh, look at the guy's new profile: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1493267/Fatality_of_Mortality

For some strange reason he's changed his name, but not his tune. Doesn't even update his insults. (One of my readers who slammed him, has published a story, but he still claims that THEY haven't.... Makes him look stupid!) Oh, and notice that the majority of his 'favorited authors' are just like him. Flamers who haven't published a single thing!

lol, bets on whether the guy has a day job or is a basement whore?

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One question remained, though: why did I have to learn it that way? Why didn't my friends and betas tell me earlier that my little scene was far from being logic?

I don't know about the betas, but I think so far as Friends go they see the positives in you a lot more than the negatives. If my IRL friends concentrated on the negatives, none of them would be able to stand me!

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  • 1 month later...

my first flame was on Fictionpress, and the writer didn't even bother to log on.... I don't have the actual thing anymore.... but it said something about not liking the gay content (duh! there are warnings all over my summary and also at the start of the first chap....), also it was full of spelling errors...

I laughed about it and went on :D

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  • 4 months later...
WHAT (Email Hidden) 2009-08-05 id # 3000034086

You are a sick, sick fuck.

I hope you die in a fire, with debris pinning you on top of burning objects. Or even better, if you survive and are never found.

Another classic flame for me! The ol' "You wrote a fictionally nasty story so you should DIE FOR REAL!" Gotta love them author burnin' priorities. A shame the email is hidden, I expect they're a real intellectual sort.

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No one has flamed me. Why? What am I doing wrong? (Fandom: Harry Potter, writes: mostly slash and especially chanslash, OTP: consensual Lucius/Draco, tends to get some hatred out of my system by writing noncon Draco/Hermione ...though dubcon Lucius/Harry is still so much better because mindfuck is love.) How to make readers really angry?

Anyway, there is only one good flame in the whole world and sadly it doesn't work in Internet. It is "Burning this text would be an insult to fire."

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Maybe you need to find a fandom which has even crazier fans than harry potter...twilight. :D

Thanks for your help :D ! Well, Harry Potter fandom seems to be pretty decent; people seem to understand that if something squicks the living Hell out of them, they don't. have. to. read. it. About Twilight then... to quote my friend The Real Luciusmistress: "Bella Lestrange could eat Bella Swan alive." As far as I know, the main character in Twilight is a Mary Sue already and while I have my RL BDSM tendencies, I'm definitely not that hardcore. :thumbsup:

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I am not saying they [Harry potter fandom] are lunatics, just that are a lot of fans and said fans tend to be obsessed.

See: (for a laugh)

http://www.cracked.com/article_17510_5-way...-seriously.html

But Twilight, they make some of the worst Harry Potter fans look good in comparison.

I enjoyed the Harry Potter books, it was well written and enjoyable. Twilight is like a bad fanfic, with a Mary Sue, a stalker (cuz stalkin' equals love see?), ignoring canon (sparkly vampires), etc,

Not to say there is anything wrong with those, they can all be well done, but not everyone can pull off that combo.

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  • 3 weeks later...

So, I have just been flamed

The Pairing Guy 2009-08-30 id # 3000037515

Eh, this story doesn't make any sense in too many places. First and foremost: "Disorganized remnants of the empire's vast army... had become lawless brigands that caused havoc wherever they could, raiding small towns, burning farms and despoiling temples." Why should this happen just because they lost a war? Did the German army run nuts all over Europe after World War II? Did all the English turn into lawless brigands when they were pushed out of France during the Hundred Years War?

"The once mighty empire of Runefaust had been defeated." Um, Runefaust is a kingdom, not an empire.

The nonsensicality continues: "The throne sat empty for now, and until the world was peaceful, it had to stay that way"? How the heck does a throne just sit empty? A nation needs a ruler. For that matter, why is Anri shirking her responsibilities just to run around the Guardiana forests with Mae? Anri has always been depicted as a very responsible woman in the games.

"It was always considered bad taste for other races to emphasize their differences more than necessary." Huh? It's considered bad taste to remind Mae that she's a centaur?

I can't help but feel insulted by this fic. You throw all these contrivances at us that are devoid of sense and logic and expect us to just swallow them. I don't mind a little nonsense if it helps further the lemon, but this is just ridiculous.

Speaking of which, the lemon here(little of it as there is) is more scary than anything. I can't understand why Anri wasn't afraid that her arm would get stuck or even crushed.

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So, I have just been flamed

I personally don't really consider that a flame. A flame isn't simply someone that disagrees with us or dislikes something we've written, contrary to what many people believe these days. A genuine flame is where a person makes rude and nasty comments with the sole aim of causing arguments and upset, and with absolutely no trace of constructive criticisms in evidence. While that critique was delivered more harshly than is strictly necessary, the person is giving reasons why they dislike certain parts of the story, and, without being at all familiar with the fan fiction, they do appear to be valid criticisms, at least to some degree. I think what the person was trying to say, in a rather rough way, is that you might need to offer better explanations and descriptions in certain parts of the story. At the very least, it might be worth rereading the story slowly and carefully to see if the person might perhaps have a point here and there.

It's also a good point for reviewers. If you deliver a review harshly, no matter how warranted you might think it is, the chances are that the author will simply dismiss your comments out of hand. If you're going to leave constructive criticisms then it really pays to do it calmly and rationally, fully explaining exactly why you disagree or dislike what was written. Otherwise, you're almost certainly waisting your time leaving a review.

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There was some constructive criticism buried in rudness, but at the end is definite flaming.

Eh, this story doesn't make any sense in too many places. First and foremost: "Disorganized remnants of the empire's vast army... had become lawless brigands that caused havoc wherever they could, raiding small towns, burning farms and despoiling temples." Why should this happen just because they lost a war? Did the German army run nuts all over Europe after World War II? Did all the English turn into lawless brigands when they were pushed out of France during the Hundred Years War?

Let's see, if a kingdom rose quickly to an empire, it would need to hire some mercenaries and generally evil empires tend to employ blokes who are not known as very nice. What happens to an empire when the leader has built a personality cult? It falls apart as factions emerge trying to grab their own piece of the pie.

"The once mighty empire of Runefaust had been defeated." Um, Runefaust is a kingdom, not an empire.

When you start trying to conquer the world, I think you fall into empire territory

The nonsensicality continues: "The throne sat empty for now, and until the world was peaceful, it had to stay that way"? How the heck does a throne just sit empty? A nation needs a ruler. For that matter, why is Anri shirking her responsibilities just to run around the Guardiana forests with Mae? Anri has always been depicted as a very responsible woman in the games.

They are there to help clear out bandits from the area. Journeying around will allow her to establish contacts and show pro-active steps to establishing peace. Mae is there to safeguard Anri.

There are people known as stewards who rule when the king (or queen) is away. And seeing how guardinia was pretty much destroyed, there is not much ruling to do at the moment. So why not leave the construction in capable hands and do things only the ruler can effectively do?

"It was always considered bad taste for other races to emphasize their differences more than necessary." Huh? It's considered bad taste to remind Mae that she's a centaur?

Think about it this way, if Mae was blind, would it be sensitive for Anri to run around saying, "Everything is so pretty here, the folors and views are fantastic! Don't you agree Mae? Oh wait, you are blind, you can't see it." That would be considered very impolite. And until magical races exist on the earth, we can only speculate on what would be sensitive and impolite issues. There are things that both races can and can't do. Trying to treat everyone equally and without discrimination is not a bad thing.

I can't help but feel insulted by this fic. You throw all these contrivances at us that are devoid of sense and logic and expect us to just swallow them. I don't mind a little nonsense if it helps further the lemon, but this is just ridiculous.

Ah, here comes the real flaming. Beforehand it could have just been construed as constructive criticism delivered in a rude manner.

Speaking of which, the lemon here(little of it as there is) is more scary than anything. I can't understand why Anri wasn't afraid that her arm would get stuck or even crushed.

Flaming once more. I don't have to put smut in my story, but I did. I put the appropriate amount of smut to plot for a story that size. And on the actual act itself, use common sense here. If Human females can fist themselves without any problem, do you think that a Centaur would have any problem? If anything, that would be the only practical way for a human female to pleasure a female centaur without resorting to extreme measures.

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When you start trying to conquer the world, I think you fall into empire territory
Well, no, that's not the definition of empire.

The conquering king decides to let other kingdom keep their sovereignty, to some limited extent, with a king, and leverages himself up to emperor...a king over kings.

If the other kingdoms are subsumed into the conquering kingdom, then it's just a really large kingdom.

Ah, here comes the real flaming. Beforehand it could have just been construed as constructive criticism delivered in a rude manner.
I really don't think that's flaming, either. They listed their problems with the story, and continue to do so.

"Flames" are not just dislike or negative criticism.

When they threaten to track you down and rape you with the shaft of a left-handed Swiss Guard halberd (sans lubricant) for what you did to their favorite character/relationship/storyline, or assume that you're a hermaphrodite from the way you write a sex scene, and possibly an epileptic one at that, you might have a real flame. Or if they use ALL CAPS for either the entire review, or EVERY SINGLE adjective they LOVINGLY shoehorn into the FLAMING review.

Flaming once more. I don't have to put smut in my story, but I did. I put the appropriate amount of smut to plot for a story that size.
There's an appropriate plot/sex ratio?

Huh.

I get a few complaints that there's not enough sex in some of my stories, but i figure that's because many AFF readers just assume that i'm posting here because there's too much graphic sex in the thing to post it anywhere else, and they're disappointed when i don't deliver.

Not because they fail to grasp the scientifically established literary merit of a sex writing ratio.

Still, just because the reader wants more sex in something he/she/it/they read on AFF, doesn't make this a flame.

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I gotta say, it does read more like extra-snarky constructive criticism than a flame to me. It can be hard to tell though - I just realised one of my reviews, quoted on the first page of this thread, "I feel disgusted just from reading that." was probably meant as the highest compliment rather than a flame. Certainly it isn't a personal attack of any nature, and doesn't have the one line "Die in a fire" or "Your mind is horrible" comments of other reviews I've received.

If you can, look at the review gratefully and see if you can find relevence of the criticism offered on an impersonal writing basis. I'd really appreciate more detailed reviews of that nature, but as I hardly write now I don't see many coming in future! :o

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This is an important subject, because AFF does NOT tolerate flames, so it's important for authors to recognise just what a flame is. And while that review was hash - even aggressive - and poorly put, it wasn't a flame. A bad review, yes, but not a flame. Flames don't offer anything constructive.

If you do happen to receive a genuine flame and you want to report it then don't delete it. Leave it there and go to the "Report" subforum to report it, and we'll deal with it. As I said, we don't tolerate flamers or trolls.

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It may not be a full on flame and did make some points that I should clear up to prevent confusion (but then again the story is also fine as it is). The tone was disrespectful and filled with enough attacks on me that I decided to delete it. Though that decision was prompted by the last two comments, not the others.

I can't help but feel insulted by this fic. You throw all these contrivances at us that are devoid of sense and logic and expect us to just swallow them. I don't mind a little nonsense if it helps further the lemon, but this is just ridiculous.

Speaking of which, the lemon here(little of it as there is) is more scary than anything. I can't understand why Anri wasn't afraid that her arm would get stuck or even crushed.

The person states that he/she is insulted by my fic.I feel that this is the closest that the reviewer comes to directly flaming me, but it still is enough for me.

And then claims that these ruin the story (as I mentioned, the points he/she brought up were minor and the fic would not suffer if I ignored them).

Also what is wrong with not having that much lemon? (BTW I think the story is close to PWP or being almost pure lemon).

And then comes out with an idiotic comment that the Anri should have been worried that her arm would be crushed in Mae's vagina. (BTW Mae is a CENTAUR).

This is utterly ridiculous. If the female vagina can be fisted easily and accommodate a hand. I do believe that a centaur vagina (which is supposed to deal with what amounts to a horse penis) could be able to easily handle fisting.

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