spookymuffin Posted February 25, 2011 Report Share Posted February 25, 2011 (edited) Thanks to Danyealle-sama for pointing out to me that it would be more appropriate to post the replies to reviews here on the forums rather than at the end of chapters. The eight chapter is up now and I look forward to any comments or (constructive) criticism that anyone might have to offer. I've been feeling kind of crappy recently and I think that that might have come through in this chapter... it came out way more emo than I had originally intended. Edited February 25, 2011 by spookymuffin Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest cocopower1 Posted February 26, 2011 Report Share Posted February 26, 2011 This is new. A forum for reviews, that's pretty cool. The chapter didn't feel emo. I mostly took this chapter as an opportunity build Sai's character and to get a better feel of his emotional state (or lack of). I'm looking forward to the next chapter. Anxious to read if there are any fight scenes or unhappy reunions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spookymuffin Posted February 27, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 27, 2011 This is new. A forum for reviews, that's pretty cool. The chapter didn't feel emo. I mostly took this chapter as an opportunity build Sai's character and to get a better feel of his emotional state (or lack of). I'm looking forward to the next chapter. Anxious to read if there are any fight scenes or unhappy reunions. Thank you! I'm glad that it didn't feel emo. I'm just kind of paranoid sometimes that the angst might come across as kind of... gratuitous? Especially when things are going to get more angsty before they get better. The next chapter is giving me a little trouble, mostly with the fight scenes (yep, they are in there!), but I should (hopefully) still get it uploaded in and around a week from now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spookymuffin Posted March 6, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 6, 2011 Ninth chapter is up now. This chapter gave me a lot of trouble... there was a big fight scene that just didn't want to be written and then when I managed to get some of it down I ended up deciding that it would fit better in the next chapter anyway. *sigh* I feel like this chapter is kind of boring and transitional... but I promise that it will get better! The next instalment has action and angst all over the place. My beta (who is also my fiancé! I love you baby!) pointed out that he thought that the ANBU enemies have been going down too easily and I guess that I want to address that here (just in case anyone else was thinking the same thing). My reasoning when I'm writing these fights is that Team Kakashi is ridiculously overpowered in universe; Kakashi, Yamato and Sai are all considered "elite" within the ANBU, Sakura is the Fifth Hokage's apprentice and the only one to have learned her deadly super strength and then Naruto is the hero of Konoha, the genin that defeated Pain! I just don't see them having too much trouble with regular ANBU is all. As always any comments and (constructive) criticism are appreciated. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spookymuffin Posted March 27, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 27, 2011 Chapter 9.5 is up: http://naruto.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600103199&chapter=10 Chapter ten is a bitch that simultaneously doesn't want to be written but also managed to balloon out into something much larger than what I originally intended to write for this part. As such, it's going to take me a while to make the tenth chapter presentable but at the same time I'm very aware of how long it's been since I've updated... So, I present to you the start of chapter ten to tide you over until I've wrangled the rest of it into submission. Thanks to cinder1013 for their review. I am a bit of a NaruSaiSaku shipper but I don't think I'll ever pursue it seriously in this fic... however I might be convinced to do a oneshot for the three of them :3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest cocopower1 Posted March 27, 2011 Report Share Posted March 27, 2011 I'm so looking forward to chapter 10. It's sounds like a major fight scene or discovery will come about. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spookymuffin Posted April 9, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 9, 2011 The rest of chapter ten is up now: http://naruto.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600103199&chapter=11 This chapter really hated me something fierce and fought me every step of the way, but it's down on paper (?) now and I can finally relax! I need opinions on whether the gore is a little too much. I'm more than willing to scale it back in future battle-oriented chapters if it's turning people off the story. Thanks to cocopower1 (hope you enjoyed it!) and GlassesandWhatnot (I'm glad I've helped make another Sai convert!) for their reviews. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest cocopower1 Posted April 15, 2011 Report Share Posted April 15, 2011 The gore in the fight scene seems fitting with the story. I say that because you've captured the relationship between Sai and Naruto realistically. So making the fight scenes realistic makes sense. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest cocopower1 Posted May 19, 2011 Report Share Posted May 19, 2011 Ok, so I don't have a live journal account so I'm posting my response here. **So that's where you've been. Thanks for the heads up. And congratulations on your new job! Hope everything turns out well!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spookymuffin Posted May 22, 2011 Author Report Share Posted May 22, 2011 Ok, so I don't have a live journal account so I'm posting my response here. **So that's where you've been. Thanks for the heads up. And congratulations on your new job! Hope everything turns out well!! Thank you I have been getting a little bit of writing done every now and again... but it's hard to fit it in around work and looking after the zoo that I have at home. I do promise that I'm not abandoning the story though! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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