Have I got a Sue?

[errihu]

Alright, time for a Sue-check. There's a dearth of female characters I actually LIKE in Naruto, although I think I might write an Ino/Gaara at some time. And since I haven't yet got the guts to try writing some yaoi, I thought I'd start my inaugural run into the Narutoverse with this story. Please advise on whether this character should be shot dead or whether I should continue.

Fandom: Naruto (World of Warcraft).

Name of character: Suranaku (Suran).

Race of character: Netherdrake.

Age of character: early 90s (that would be considered young adult in netherdrake years).

Height of character: 5'6"

Weight of character: Unspecified (being a death fat myself, I have no idea what normal people weigh. I would guess 130 lbs or so).

Brief background of character: Suranaku botched her escape from Netherwing ledge as a young drake, and then botched her attempt to cast a teleport spell back to safety. She ended up in the Narutoverse. After teaching herself to hunt and having some unfortunate run-ins with humans, she took a human form, only to find out that being female in a male-dominated society isn't that wonderful. In order to keep herself alive and relatively safe, she masqueraded as a man and as an itinerant pilgrim, searching for ways to return to her own world. She ends up wandering for about 50-60 years. Having witnessed most of the shinobi world wars, she is somewhat terrified of shinobi and being discovered, and tries to avoid attention. However, she occasionally gets lonely and travels with other pilgrims.

Character's position or job: Homeless bum (itinerant pilgrim)

Strengths/Skills: Road-wise, weather-wise, woods-wise. Very good at running away. She is able to take her dragon form, and to breathe shadow fire. She is able to bring herself and other people (with a limit on mass) into the shadow world. She is old enough to use dragon fear attacks. She's pretty bright, but not a genius.

Are these skills typical of the fandom? If not, why?: The first three are the kind of skill anyone with enough experience could have. The fourth is nothing special. The rest are something that would be possible for most netherdrakes (I based the shadow world on their ability to phase in and out of the physical world). The shadow world could be a potential game breaker, but I made it an awful place where people avoid going if at all possible.

Weaknesses/Bad habits: She's illiterate. She is terrified of discovery by shinobi, especially Ota(Sound) due to fears of being captured, tortured, and stuffed into some poor Jinchuuriki as a power source. She is slightly nervous and fearful. She is absolutely inept in most forms of combat outside of her dragon form and is old enough that she wouldn't be able to effectively learn much more than basic self defense and panic reactions. In her dragon form, she has had little practice and basically fights only out of desperation. She stinks when she's been running around in the woods for more than a few days without bathing. She gets bruises and cuts and injuries when she fights, and they're not strategically located to add to her attractiveness.

Distinctive features, if any: Shadowy blue eyes (like most netherdrakes). She's a dragon. However, 99% of the time she looks like a pretty standard human. She has regular old black hair, like 75% of the characters in Naruto.

Are these features unique in the fandom? If so, why?: Not to netherdrakes, nor to Naruto. Narutoverse has a lot of funky eyes.

Connections to canon characters (if any): Falls in love with Gaara (He's 23 in the fic). She kind of saves his life, and he saves hers. When he gets kidnapped later in the story, she enables him to rescue himself.

How does your character get on with those around him/her?: She is generally pleasant to civilians, although she is nervous and shy around shinobi. She learns to be more at ease around shinobi throughout the course of the story.

What does the other characters think of your character when they met her/him?: Gaara thinks she's a man at first. Once he discovers she's a woman, he finds her somewhat attractive but avoids getting too close to her. Eventually, they develop romantic feelings for each other and fall in love. Other characters are neutral to her, suspicious, friendly, or don't care. Most are more concerned about Gaara's well-being, and provisionally accept her because she seems to make him happy. Matsuri is disgusted with her lack of ability to learn to defend herself. Temari railroads her into doing whatever Temari wants her to. Kankuro doesn't care, as long as she doesn't hurt Gaara.

[Tempestuous]

Doesn't sound like a sue to me. But if you're unsure, you can always run her through this test: http://www.springhole.net/quizzes/marysue.htm

That said, I've never read a WoW x Naruto crossover before... this is very intriguing! I hope you can keep her exactly as you specified, as I've seen people spiral into the bad kind of fic after a while by making their character level infinity with powers that could knock Itachi over with a sneeze.

Anyway, good luck! I like the idea and I give your character my stamp of approval.

[errihu]

Doesn't sound like a sue to me. But if you're unsure, you can always run her through this test: http://www.springhole.net/quizzes/marysue.htm

That said, I've never read a WoW x Naruto crossover before... this is very intriguing! I hope you can keep her exactly as you specified, as I've seen people spiral into the bad kind of fic after a while by making their character level infinity with powers that could knock Itachi over with a sneeze.

Anyway, good luck! I like the idea and I give your character my stamp of approval.

Ahh yes, I've used that sue test a few times. However, it doesn't deal well with crossovers or romances. Unlike this sue test, I don't believe just because something is a crossover or a romance involving a canon character, that it is automatically a sue. However even with those aspects, she still checks out around a 25-27, so not too bad for an OC.

Edited May 8, 2010 by errihu