Keith Inc.

Okay, thanx.

I'm a little confused? Someone changed my disclaimers on my GT fanfiction stories to say: This is a work fiction, based on Gullivers Travels by JonathanI assumed this spartan disclaimer is due to the source being in the Public Domain archive. I copied that disclaimer into my newest GT fanfic and have received a warning from a moderator that it's insufficient. Please tell me what the disclaimer should be for all gulliver's travels fanfic and i will update all my stories in that section.

I can see dates. Those are useful. Especially if the flashbacks advance the narrative. One week before.. Ten years before... Half a rat tart later... I actually enjoy NOT putting chapter headers in when the POV changes. I should hope that i've created reasonably distinct characters so when i shift from third person to first, they can figure out who's talking from his or her established traits. And there are clues that fit in, too. If i've shifted from the owner to the hamster, i'll throw in a line of 'so the view from the cage never changes....' It's a little more difficult to carry off, but as someone said, the other way is just lazy writing. But what gets me REALLY going are stories in first person where they narrate things they couldn't know. I mean, it's one thing to some time later ask someone what was going on and getting details. "What i didn't know was that they were sneaking up on me at the time..." But someone on AFF wrote about running and hiding, and some distance away, (down the hall, around a corner and down another hall) his enemies have a detailed conversation. "I was in the library. I couldn't hear what was going on in the gym. Jenny said 'We have to find him' and Sheila said 'And quickly!' Fleh. Lazy, lazy writing. For sheer, wonderful technical writing, the opposite of such laziness, i love Soldier of the Mist. The character suffers a head blow and loses his long-term memory. The story is his written journal, and only records what he could remember when he had the opportunity to write in it. Gene Wolfe had to carefully lay out the adventures, keeping the need for record keeping in mind, and situations where details would be lost. It's also a pretty fun fantasy, but i've always been impressed by Wolfe's dedication to the narrative's credibility.

My muse is Thalia. She's not the original Greek muse, but she bought the franchise right from the first one. She's about two feet tall. Curious and whimsical, she goes lots of places i'd never think to, finding inspiration that makes me marvel that it took me this long to figure it out. Blackadder as Gulliver? Of course. Rowan Atkinson on Simpsons? Perfect. A zoo with animals that are mythical in my world? Brillig. She can't stand to be ignored. My current method to avoid burnout is to stop writing and read a book. THoughts seem to process in the back of my head. When i finish a chapter, it's time to turn around and write. She's only supposed to be my inspiration, but she ends up doing a lot of the heavy lifting until i'm ready to put it on paper. THere are days when her mood is flighty, i can write a chapter for each of seven stories in one day. And days when she focuses like a short blonde laser with a greek accent, and i write 80 pages of one story without relent. SHe loves sex scenes. Writing them choreographing them, finding new positions, angles, erogenous zones. Love love love sexy. My beast is Thalia. She also drinks heavily. Sometimes on a pub crawl. I have had moments of writer's block that were extended until she made bail or slipped out between the bars. She punishes inattention. She will show me the opening of a story and the final scene. ANd connecting the two ideas...a vast, arid wasteland. I get into stages where i know the O's in Ohio like the back of my hand, but couldn't write 'hi' to save my life. Or she gets into the illicit drugs (she can walk into parties like i put on a pair of pants. Comfortable and friendly, she's everyone's friend of a friend. I can't stand to go out for drinks after work with coworkers), which she says it's only polite to sample, and then goes on a plot bunny binge. Always at night or when i'm driving, with no way to write down the inspiration, or preserve the dialogue that comes up. They flow up and over me, and only rarely come back to mind when i can take advantage of them. And she hates my sex scenes. I'm a hack. Smut is so terribly unoriginal. Why bother? It's all the same. STuff goes in, unless it's stuff slides over or stuff spins around. I could just write 'and then the sex.' Like stage direction, or that wonderful scene in Shibumi. But no, i push out more stuff that i thought was different because now the woman is a redhead!

My wife was in labor for our oldest for about a month.Idiot tried to come out at the 5th month, they managed to keep him in for another 32 days. Two pounds, two ounces. The twins were monsters, though. Two pounds seven and two pounds four ounces. My wife's aim sucks, but her GROUPING is amazing.

HA!

Or 3, "I suck at summaries" Or 'Look inside.' I'm going to up your hits just to find out what the fuck your story is about? My absolute least favorite, though, a three word summary, fifteen to twenty warning codes for a one-chapter fic. Maybe as a technical exercise, i could imagine a bestiality xenophile threesome moresome slash gentle abuse scat F/F, M/M, M/F/M, AM/FM, blood, sweat and tears PWP, but it doesn't sound like anything i wanna read. Maybe as a sort of word-search game? "Okay, the monkey-man with two dicks screwing the schizophrenic porn star fore and aft, one personality feeling the butt sex, the other shouting about coming in her cunny, that paragraph counts for bestiality, a threesome, anal AND double-penetration..." But again, other than just doing it to show it can be done, i have more fun reading the cast list for Glee...

Maybe after a while there'll be a Harry Potter Growed Up Mini-series...

I don't think it's a waste. I think long exposition dumps are boring and unnatural. When someone gives a speech are you completely reactionless? Unthinking recording machines doing no more than witness the speech? There's going to be some little responses. Maybe they're all internal. Personally, i think putting a few normal reactions into the dialogue makes it more realistic. Makes the scene into something the readers can sympathize with. Even if it's as little as having the speaker glance to see who's listening or who's fantasizing about their latest fanfic. "Talk, talk, talk." Bored out of his skull, Ron began counting the adverbs in Dumbledore's speech. "Speeching, speechity-speech." Hermione was riveted. Harry saw the look in her eye and shook his head in chagrin. ONly his friend could be that amazed by even the most trivial parts of the algae harvesting treaty with the merpeople in the lake. "Blah, blah, blah," he read, realizing he'd taken the wrong speech when he left his rooms. The Phoenix must have nested in the edited version. "I do have to mention," he added, "that quotation marks are similar to parentheses. They contain the speech." He pointed to the board where his remarks were encapsulated in quotation marks. He clicked the wand and the imps wrote the next part. "One thing that's different, though, is continuing speech across two paragraphs. "In that case, it's the LACK of a closing quotation mark that indicates the speaker is still speaking, even though a new paragraph has begun." "REally?" she asked. "Yes, really." "So, if there are lines of dialogue that have closing quote marks-" "Quotation marks, to be precise." "Thank you. If the alternating lines of dialogue have quotation marks, it can be understood that different speakers are talking different lines?" "Yes." "Oh, that's helpful." "To a degree." "WHat do you mean?" "Well, it's considered 0nly polite to put a few 'he said, she said' comments in the exchange, if only so the reader doesn't have to keep counting on his fingers to figure out who said what." "Ah," she said with a nod. "Exactly," he agreed, pointing to her nod note with a bit of a flourish.

Wow. I'm convinced. he's so mature there should be an exception in his case. He is the fucking victim here, after fucking all. Just...fuuuuuck.

JUst had an idea that seems to have potential, but i'm just not in the mood to write it. Some library, a bit in the future, is almost entirely electronic. A poor choice of words in the AI's programming has it surfing the web for library content, but accidentally includes fanfiction. The poor AI is at a loss on how to organize this stuff into the DDS. It begs for help and the librarian dons a headset to go into the virtual library. There the AI's avatar is not only overwhelmed by a huge stack of AFF stories, it has read some. The content dribbles into his, for lack of a better word, mind. "Miss Jones, i have an unfortunate need to drill you to the wall with my magnificent man-meat." "Oh?" "Yes. But Miss Jones? I have neither a drill nor meat. How do we solve this difficulty?" "Oh, my." They explore all sorts of words Dewey never imagined needing a category for ("Anthro Vore Crossover Drabble, Miss Jones? Three shelves of AVCD?"), and deal with the mortal stirrings in the immortal's virtual frame... Free to whoever wants the distinction of Dewey Decimal Porn...

Not quite direct plagiarism, but i've seen something very like Phatchick's 'How the 12 days of christmas would go down' before. I remember the xerox page being passed around offices before the internet existed. the story: http://original.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600103251 Echoes something passed around in the Before Time: http://www.humormatters.com/holidays/12%20Days%20Of%20Xmas.htm http://www.kraftmstr.com/christmas/humor/12days-h.html

I've been deleting and reloading about 70 chapters of one of my stories here. (Formatting issues and why did no one ever tell me i never posted chapter 11?) And i've had a few posers show up on reCAPTCHA. The last one scared me...is it THAT easy? Or too good to be true...? I feared if i answered, the screen would explode...

Some of my reviews do ask, 'what is this doing on AFF?' The easy answer is that everything i do is on AFF. There's a place for the most graphic stories i can produce, and room for everything else. I've tried a few places that are specifically set up for a fetish or a fandom. And i get tired of the responses that are mostly just 'here are the changes you should make to customize this story as fap material for me.' I write. IF you commission me, i'll write what you want to see in a way you want to see it. Other than that, i write for me, and i post it for anyone else that might be interested, and the one in a hundred interested that might give me an upcheck or a downcheck on the effort. And the one in a hundred of them who'll post a review. And, i have noticed that anything A++ gets more hits than the other stuff. But I laugh because if they're zeroing in on that, hoping for fap material, those who aren't familiar with my tastes are in for a surprise...

I get several that i know what it is, but am unsure what to type. I JUST got one that... What the punk monkey...? A high backed chair with feet approaching a telephone pole...

Wait, she has a power that doesn't always work? That's not typically a Sue trait. Well, look at it from the POV of trying TO write a Sue. Her power would always work. SHE would be the one gaining memories. Those would not be fragments, they'd be MAPQUEST instructions to the next plot point. It would not cost her, it would restore the patient's health AND energize Sue... Well, a one in ten chance that she's so drained by the process that, like the Miri character on Star Trek TOS, using her power would risk her very life...each and every time. SO even to get a splinter out of a widdle pinkie finger, she'd have to spend two pages moralizing how the risk of healing now might mean she'll be unable to heal a more critical wound in the coming battle, but if there's a chance, she's morally compromised if she doesn't use her power...blah, blah, blah, me, me, me. As an approach? Be unapologetic, esp. if it's a major plot point. IF there are costs and risks, and not 'premature death scene' costly, it's not Sue.

In perpetuity in Great Britain, but not everywhere outside of GB's jurisdiction. At least, that's my understanding. It's why the author of Skeptics Annotated Bible uses the KJV for his website.

The King James version of The Books is older than copyright law and is in the Public Domain (except in Britain). Specific modern translations do have copyrights. Quoting from the New American Standard The Books is a no-no beyond the 'Fair Use' parts of copyright law. I've written The Books fanfiction. Saying that the story that is located on AFF is fictional is NOT the same as claiming that the source material is a work of fiction. This is misunderstood by the people who make the petitions to remove Bible categories from FF and AFF.

THat's so sad...

Well, my one and only Star Wars fic is, technically, Het. Leia and Chewbacca: http://movies.adult-fanfiction.org/authors.php?no=1296784213

Oh. So i have about 10% of all monies in circulation.Dang. I thought it had something to do with all the money i had squirreled away in other places before the change. Maxed bank accounts, maxed arcade account, all the money in the guild bank... Ah, well. That makes sense i guess.

So, snow day yesterday. School closed and i wasn't in the mood to go to work. Took the kids with me on a few errands, as pack mules, then to the post office. They watched me try to open the post office box. Key wouldn't go in. THey stare. I finally notice that i'm trying to open the box with the key to my wife's Honda. "Oh! That's silly!" I rearrange the keys in my hand. "I'm driving my car today!" My Honda's keys wouldn't open the lock neither. There's that old joke, be nice to your kids. They're the ones picking your retirement home? I think the twins are looking through brochures...

Part of my stats say that i have 21 billion points but i only seem to be able to play with a little under two billion of them. Are they two different accounts or what?

SW = Shrunken Woman or Small Woman (as in Lilliputians or fae, born the size they are relative to a human) GT = Giant SM = Shrunken (small) Man GTS = Giantess