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Ghost-of-a-Chance

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Everything posted by Ghost-of-a-Chance

  1. So. Is it colder than a witch’s cunt where y’all are, too? No? Just us? Muh-zurr-uh’s done froze over, folks. 

    1. Show previous comments  9 more
    2. manta2g

      manta2g

      Been sitting in the -40s all week with the bloody north wind. Well my fault for being in Manisnowba.

    3. Desiderius Price

      Desiderius Price

      @manta2g Think you need two of these… at least.  :fthrower::fthrower: And…

    4. Wilde_Guess

      Wilde_Guess

      @manta2g, you do know that fully fifty percent of your fellow Canadians live well south of the 49th Parallel for a reason, don’t you?

  2. That moment when you keep hearing a soprano velociraptor playing one-sided Marco Polo out in the hallway and realize, oh, no, it’s just the Velcro cat wailing pitifully because you locked him out of the office. 
    Woozle. Because of course, it’s Woozle. Never mind that I locked him out because I have cramps, a headache, and writer’s block, and I don’t feel up to fending off his usual shenanigans. By Shenanigans, I mean shaking slobber everywhere, whining, trying to insinuate his fat butt between the desk and my rack, and trying to scale Mount Mom’s-Desk and causing a landslide.

    Kid, Mama needs to work! Stay in your box!

  3. Y’all, I couldn’t make this shit up if I tried. I’m editing a new chapter of A New Lease on Life <500 words at a time with ProWritingAid, and the Readability checker gave me such a double take I heard my neck crack. I posted a screenshot on Tumblr because pics or it didn’t happen.

    An (admittedly wordy) paragraph got a hard to read flag. Everything is spelled correctly, but it has several big words regarding language and its various parts and traits. You know. Words like consonants, syllables, dialects, and pronunciation. Hard, however, seems excessive.

    Right above this paragraph is one marked easy to read. The entire thing is written in (intentionally) misspelled Scots and Scots-Gaelic that gave the spelling and grammar checker a stroke…and it’s easy to read…

    …what…the actual…fuck… :WTF:

    1. Desiderius Price

      Desiderius Price

      Guess I’m a bit… don’t have a great opinion about bots, so I focus on human readability over some electromechanical Turk.

  4. @BronxWench, thank you so freaking much! I’m FINALLY logged back into my account! I can finally update my stories here. Thanks for your patience and determination. 💜 Give the grumpy corgi a chin scritch for us. (“Us” being myself, and my kitties Woozle and Heiferlump.)
  5. The activation link worked, but I got the same “this password reset is no longer valid” error message when I followed the password reset link. From opening the email to reaching the site, it couldn’t have been a whole minute. I’d include a screenshot, but it’s coming up larger than the limit even after cropping. This locked-out saga has completely ruined my ability to believe I’m in any way technologically literate. EDIT: I uploaded a cropped screenshot to my Google drive HERE.
  6. Over a year later, and I’m still locked out of my account, and still not able to reset my password. Only difference? Now I’m getting this error message when I try resetting my password: …all except for one email address. That address, once the password reset link from my inbox loads, I get the message that it expired…in seconds. I’m starting to consider just scrapping the whole posting on AFF deal. 😔
  7. While my husband fed the cats a moment ago, I squirted the younger one’s liquid medicine down his throat. Woozle, the little shit, let half the dose drip out of his mouth and roll down my shirt and shorts. I grumbled about it—because that medicine stains, turns into tar, and smells like rotten fish a roadkill—and what did Cold say?

    ”Well. Pussy likes to dribble.”

     I married this clown. I married him. (He’s not wrong, though.)

  8. Using AI to edit your smut can be so wild. ProWritingAid decided that this sentence…

    Quote

    Kai’e’ie is insatiable—ravenous, breath-stealing, and covetous—and its expression is primal and passionate fucking.

    …needs this correction: 

    Quote

    Kai’e’ie is insatiable—ravenous, breath-stealing, and covetous—and its expression is primal and passionate about fucking.

    I mean, sure, I’m as passionate about fucking as anyone, but that isn’t quite what I was going for there. I can only assume the algorithm assumed Kai’e’ie is a name rather than an emotion and that I was trying to make small talk instead of comparing two different emotional states—Kai’e’ie versus mi’lee’veez—related to intimacy. (Kai’e’ie’: combined from syllables from words meaning love, say, life, and bond; combined, the meaning is, literally love said, life-bound, or figuratively, without you, I die. The fictional people who created this word are apparently as dramatic as I can write them. Mi’lee’veez: the root words in their entirety and proper order mean my dream heart. Sappity-sap-sop, someone get a mop.)

     

    This is what I get for creating a fictional language for my novel. 🙄 J.R.R., you’re a horrible influence.

    1. Desiderius Price

      Desiderius Price

      Welcome to the world that also guides youtube’s AI-generated recommendations.

    2. Deadman

      Deadman

      I’m enjoying AI art personally at this point. It’s far from perfect but it’s solid.

    3. Desiderius Price

      Desiderius Price

      AI art can be great, especially if you’re wanting some visualization for a scene you’re writing but you’re not an artist.

  9. Just a quick word. I’m putting writing on the back burner for a while. When I started this topic last night, I didn’t expect to get word this morning that my parents lost another furbaby. I grew up with that particular furball, and I’m devastated. I’m going to spend a few days just hugging my cats. I’ll come back to this when I’m less likely to cry. This was the last thing I needed right now.
  10. So, apparently when I wrote this out, I didn’t word it as well as I thought I did. (Overnights suck.) I also left plenty out because I didn’t want to include anything which could be used to identify the story when it’s finished. Privacy is important when you’re a closeted disaster-bi in the Bible Belt. Let me try again. X being character in question, A being the non-human allies, K being the non-human enemies, and D being the idjit who got kidnapped by the enemies and who now needs to be brought home. D also has a piggybacking spirit (nope, this one doesn’t do anything useful beyond keep people alive) and he and X are related. The training is only part of the story—a means to an end rather than the whole plot—and other than one outburst from the piggybacker, I’m not pushing X’s abilities beyond anything humanly possible. The intention of her trainers (A) is to teach X to use the spirit’s abilities, or at the very least, how to not get killed during the final confrontation. Because X is human, however, she’s going to be fighting a losing battle. She’s fit, more so than the average American, perhaps, but trying to make her superhuman is impossible without breaking the rules I’ve laid down for the world. This is fantasy realism, not ‘screw it, tiny children can save the world and Santa Clause gives away weapons.’ It’s a spoiler, but…X is going to fail. Fantastically. She won’t be able to harness the spirit’s abilities—it’s an entirely separate entity, not a buff. She won’t be able to take down the baddies, or even fight the baddies. She’s human, and they’re far tougher with fewer weaknesses. She will, however, become a much stronger human, learn how to fight non-humans defensively without getting gutted, and discover that her humanity—or, more specifically, the critical way the C view her on account of her humanity—is one of her greatest strengths. Compare it to a tiny angry monkey demanding a fight while her big buff friends sneak in the back door and free D, then they all make use of a distraction to escape. X is the tiny angry monkey; all she has to do is scream loudly enough and keep their eyes on her. Fighting-wise, I’m planning on the majority of said training involving endurance, strength, the usual, and some hand-to-hand, mostly defensive. I might include non-lethal weapons like staves at one point; the C mostly use their fists, claws, and teeth, but the use of bladed spears and daggers isn’t uncommon. I’m intentionally giving X only enough time to make marked improvements, but not enough to become, say, John Wick. The timing is important because the date of the attack is supposed to coincide with another event, and that event occurs regularly. (For instance, a full moon, or something like it.) The first number of days (plus some) represents the number of days in a year on the A’s planet, while the second represents the number of days in a year on the C’s planet. Choosing a time closer to the first number would allow more opportunities to immerse X in the world of the A, the lives they live, and her love interest’s friends and family, but it might open up confusion regarding the timing of the event. Choosing a number closer to 600 would leave X experiencing all of this twice and risk her coming home to find herself declared dead despite the protective measures taken, but it would give more time for the romance between X and her love interest to grow more organically. …I think I got the most of it this time. Anything else I missed, just ask. I really appreciate y’all’s help with this; Reddit’s writing sub is surprisingly judgy about asking for help with your writing, and you can only ask on the Fanfiction sub about original fiction so many times before getting the boot.
  11. Simply put, my character X is fit-healthy—she kickboxes weekly, runs with her dogs daily, and has a regular routine—and she’s getting dragged to another world to be made into a badass for plot-identifying purposes. Part of that process will include possibly learning to harness some abilities imparted by a guardian spirit piggybacking on her like she’s the neighbor’s wi-fi. X will be trained by people of a much stronger species and there aren’t any shortcuts. How many days would be reasonable to allow for building X from fit to badass? I’m leaning toward between 400 and 600, but considering I’m comfortably chunky and too old and decrepit to care, it’s like a vegan offering opinions on steakhouses. We also have to keep in mind that the world keeps spinning while she’s gone; too long, and she’s likely to come back and find her bank account empty and all her shit on the auction block. …anyone got any advice?
  12. Our cats have access to two cat beds, several chairs, a couch, a couple boxes, a footrest, a beanbag, countless pillows and blankets, a sunny windowsill with a blanket in it, our bed, and a cat tree. The cats are permitted to have a cuddle, nap, or lazy moment in all of these places. If we don’t catch them first, there’s even a couple baskets of clean laundry that might be comfy.

    and Woozle wants to sleep on top of a flat of toilet paper jammed into a storage shelf.

    :WTF:
    Cats, man. You just can’t make sense of them.

    1. Show previous comments  3 more
    2. GeorgeGlass

      GeorgeGlass

      No surprise to me – my cats always seem to have a new favorite thing to lie down in or on. We call it “surface of the week.”

    3. BronxWench

      BronxWench

      I no longer have cats, but my half-Maine Coon brothers, Toivo and Aino, preferred to nap on top of the kitchen cabinets, or in Toivo’s case, on the very small window ledge in the bathroom, after he’d swept it clear of offending shampoo bottles. Both of them would deign to sit in boxes, which was often complicated by their size, but Aino also liked to hide inside paper bags, which for some reason offended Toivo no ends.  The battle to free Aino could last for a good half hour before the paper bag was in tatters.

      They weren’t fond of my feet (unlike my corgi who has cost me several years of lifespan when she stealth-licks my ankles) but Toivo liked to give me large, dead horseflies. They were placed carefully on the pillow next to my head.

      I miss having cats...

    4. Desiderius Price

      Desiderius Price

      Mine?  Starts with me hearing the high pitch noises, find the Queen having kittens, so I claimed half the litter (three of six).  Seventeen years later, I still have one of them with me (the other two have ventured across the rainbow bridge).

  13. Thank you, both for taking the time to answer and for fighting the good fight against the hacker spawn. I can be patient. Best of luck!
  14. I’m still locked out of my account. (I had to put writing aside for awhile; depression sucks, and it and all its little assbuddies can go jump off the dirty end of a cow with poke intoxication.) Well, now when I try logging in, I get a different error: “The email you provided may not be registered or is registered multiple times.” …any possible way this is due to the site being in read-only, or is this still the same problem as before. 😣 EDIT: the pen name is correct now, at least. No doxxing risk, yay!
  15. My smartass husband almost doomed us all. He’s eating animal crackers and found a cookie that appeared to be two different critters stuck together. What’s he suggest? ”Hey. Think we can fix this chimera with alchemy?” 

    :wow:

    No, Cold. HAYELL no. We are not breaking the alchemical taboo in twenty-twenty-anything, this is not the decade to risk it! There are two whole anime series about just why we don’t mess around with that! 

     

    1. BronxWench

      BronxWench

      *shoves alembic into the closet hastily*

    2. InvidiaRed
    3. Desiderius Price

      Desiderius Price

      Go ahead, do it, we could use the distraction :devil:

  16. We ordered Chinese tonight, and got a broken fortune cookie. My husband’s response? “Now that’s a misfortune right there.”

    :rofl: I’m choking on my chicken, people. 

  17. That’s still accomplishing nothing. Is there any way someone could send a link for me to reset my password, because I’m not getting the emails when I try that. They aren’t in junk or spam, either. I’ve tried signing in, resetting, clearing, and everything else I know how to do dozens of times on three different devices now and I’m still locked out and unable to fix it. I’m starting to panic here.
  18. I tried clearing my cache/cookies/website data on my iPad, and nothing changed. My password has a non-alphanumerical character, which according to other posts here, may be causing problems. Either way, how do I log out if I can’t log in??? The only option I see on the page is “log in,” and it won’t show any of the shortcuts you see when you’re logged in.
  19. I need to get into my account to correct an unexplained ‘problem’ on my profile that could result in doxxing/outing me to my homophobic family. My password isn’t working, the password reset isn’t working, I’m not getting emails for the reset – even in junk/spam – and I haven’t heard back from tech support. I’ve tried all of this – aside from contacting support – on three different browsers and devices, so it’s not a problem with my browser or computer. This is the screen I get after using the “password reset” link at the left, but that’s as far as it goes. The longer this goes unfixed, the higher the odds that someone I’m related to will find my profile, connect the problem to me, and out me to my homophobic parents as the bisexual delinquent that they can’t know I am. Please, help me fix this!
  20. I’ve got another zinger from hubs to share! A few minutes ago, I was chatting with Cold about my plants in the window and I said, “I mean, those two need repotting already. They must really like this southern exposure!”
    This guy. This absolute smartass. He looked at me with a completely innocent face and said, “yeah, but I don’t know how they can stand the accent.”
    :rofl: …y’all. Cold has a southern accent.
    Yes, I choked on my spit. That mouth of his makes me so stinking proud sometimes. 
    1. BronxWench

      BronxWench

      Your husband is utterly brilliant. Seriously demented, and utterly brilliant. :lol: 

    2. Ghost-of-a-Chance

      Ghost-of-a-Chance

      I feel the same, always. :D I’d never tell him, but I wish I were as skilled with on-the-fly wordplay as he is. I get to brag about him online, though, so I’m not disappointed. :wub:

    3. kagome26isawsome
  21. My husband today: “The United States is officially a landfill.”

    Completely unprompted. I only wish I knew what was going through his head some days. :think:

    1. Desiderius Price

      Desiderius Price

      I can definitely see arguments that’d support the statement.

  22. I wanted to share a real zinger for anyone who needs a laugh today. For this to make sense, you need to know three things: 1, I'm bi with a very supportive straight husband; 2, I'm in the closet IRL because of homophobic loved ones, and 3, I'm "out" online under my pen name. Oh, and 4, my husband Cold is an adorable smartass.

    I spent some time today working in our big hall closet, up on a stepladder. When I heard Cold come through the front door, I warned him to be careful coming through the hallway because "I'm kinda in the closet."
       "Kinda?" he retorted. "You're entirely in the closet." 
       I could hear the unspoken bi joke like a cat hearing a can opener. "I'm only in the closet IRL," I reminded him, "online, everyone and their gay stepdog knows I'm bi." 
        Cold poked his head around the door. "Either you're in the closet or you're out of the closet," he teased me. "You can't be both. You're not Schrodinger's bi."

     And that's how I realized it is entirely possible to laugh yourself right off a ladder, and that, despite getting older, Cold IS still able to catch me before I can fall on my oversized rump. I'm still grinning about this, and it's been over an hour!

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. WillowDarkling

      WillowDarkling

      That guy is definitely a keeper! :rofl: Schrodinger’s bi, indeed.

    3. BronxWench
    4. Ghost-of-a-Chance

      Ghost-of-a-Chance

      Knock yourself out, @InvidiaRed! I told him I’m stealing it, too, so he’s been warned. @WillowDarkling and @BronxWench he is a hoot, let me tell you that! I’ve gotten some real tongue-choking jokes from him in our eleven years but Schrodinger’s bi may just top them.

      Earlier this week, I complained about finding inch-worms destroying my plants. His response? Paraphrased, “I hate inchworms. They need to learn some assertiveness instead of always inching around like they’re expecting to get stepped on.” I. Just. About. Died.

  23. Well. It took close to a year and a half but we finally know why I’ve been having nerve pain and numbness and struggling to stand and walk. The ‘why’ is not an easily fixed condition (...possibly not “fixable” at all, from the sound of it...) but having an explanation for the problem is the first step on the path forward. I can’t even express how relieved I am to have physical proof that what I’ve been struggling with wasn’t just in my head; the fact that such was bothering me as strongly as it was should say something about how folks with invisible disabilities are often treated in the US. 

    I’m still stuck with walking with a cane for now. There are also orthotics, braces, medication, and routine specialist visits added to the equation now. I’m not crazy about that...but I’ll live. At least it’s not neuropathy and there’s a chance of some improvement with treatment, and so long as those two statements are true, I’m sure I can find a way to not whine too much. It’s a bonus that the medication I’m on now is helping with my bad knee (why I had the cane, to begin with) and I’ve got a very courteous and understanding doctor taking care of me. Maybe now that the testing and waiting are over, I’ll have a little more free time. If so, maybe I’ll be more able to use said free time for writing and updating. In the meantime, it’s good to be back on here even if only occasionally.

    Anyway. Dropping off the face of the earth without warning is kind of normal for me but...well...this is why I’ve been exceeding my usual DOtFotE statistics. In the coming months, if I get unusually bristly on here, say something unfriendly, or come across as short or rude, I apologize profusely in advance. I’m hanging in here the best I can...but...frankly, my nerves are compressed and sending pain and itching signals through otherwise healthy tissue, and there’s not a whole lot I can do when it gets really bad. There are days when it’s so bad I just want to cuss a blessed blue streak, cry, or both at once. Generally, I try to stay offline on days like that but they’ve snuck up on me before. If it happens, please be patient with me and let me know I’ve been a dick (because I probably won’t even realize it until later on when I’m trying to sleep) and I’ll apologize for it.

    Until next time, I hope everyone’s having a comfortable and safe spring, and wish y’all the best.

     

    1. Thundercloud

      Thundercloud

      Very important to know when things are real and not something we imagine. Sorry to hear they don’t have easy way to fix the issue, but medical science advance so who knows what might happen in the future. I hope things will improve for you even in the absence of a cure.

    2. BronxWench

      BronxWench

      I’m very glad you have an answer now, and I’m hoping that treatment does continue to make a positive difference. I don’t think there’s anything worse than having to live with constant pain. So, gentle hugs from me! :hug: 

    3. JayDee

      JayDee

      Wish you all the best too. At least diagnosis gives you better options.

  24. c9bf5b8880f27365f0ffccb8933bb05ea7638a92

    Porg-give me if this is out of line, but I wanted to show off the little buddy my hubby got me for Christmas last year. Folks, if you’re looking for love, find you someone who respects your nerdities and odditudes.

    Y’all can keep y’all’s his and hers towels; in this home we have Pikachu and Porgs.

    1. InBrightestDay

      InBrightestDay

      Quote

      Y’all can keep y’all’s his and hers towels; in this home we have Pikachu and Porgs.

      You got very Southern there for a moment. :D

      That is a really sweet gift!  I hope some day I can be married to someone like that!

    2. Ghost-of-a-Chance

      Ghost-of-a-Chance

      Quote

      You got very Southern there for a moment. :D

      In my defense, I was born and raised in Missouri maybe an hour from the M’Arkansas border, and I still live in the same region. Missouri is Southern enough for the awkward stuff like accent but too far north for the sweet tea to taste good. :lol:

      Quote

      That is a really sweet gift!  I hope some day I can be married to someone like that!

      It really was just the sweetest thing, really. I grew up in a family where fannish behavior was supposed to be kept secret and treated as an embarrassment. When Cold started bringing his Playstation and anime over for dates I knew I hit gold. Honey, if you can, try to find you a man (or woman, or both, or neither, or ancient eldritch entity, etc) who respects your inner nerd and lets theirs out around you. I hope you can find someone who appreciates you for who you are, too. It’s worth everything in the world when you can be dorks together. :tup:

      By the way? We’ve been together 11 years this April, he regularly lets me pull the “rubber ducky” maneuver on him when I’m stumped on a scene, and I’ve taken up gaming with him on occasion. He’s my favorite dork and I’m his favorite nerd, and it’s just what we both needed. :D 

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