pippychick

Oh, my… Tormund and Clegane are going to fight! Like, actually, really fight!

Wow… *types faster*

Writing, sleep, or housework?

*sighs*

And by housework, I do mean moving all of *her* shit out of the way. Because it’s getting on my nerves.

Well, I have about 5.5k words of filth that might get posted at some point tonight. Commencing read throughs.

Well, there is plenty of drama at my house tonight. We have just had to throw my aunt out after a litany of bad behaviour. Including getting dolled up and sodding off for a drink in the pub when my mother was rushed into hospital with a gallstone attack, leaving me to go in the back of the ambulance. She’s spent the last few weeks completely ignoring us, especially my mother, sneaking in and out without so much as a word. Now she’s gone.

Tried to talk to her first, but (once we’d insisted on her putting her bloody phone down), it’s like she just can’t admit how bad she’s been. Her response to going out during the ambulance thing? “I only went for one pint.” Well, fuck me. I can ony feel the utmost pity for her children. Seriously.

All we have done is help her.

The absolute best came as she went out the door, when she told my mother she’d driven my dad and my brother to suicide, and her second husband too. My mother has been widowed twice.

I think good riddance to her.

For perspective, this is the behaviour of a forty-seven year old woman.

In other news, I am nearly 2000 words in to the next chapter.

Ok… next chapter is currently being written. They get one more lazy lie in before they have to pack up and move out. What will they do with it...?

Well, I have finished the chapter, and it’s still off. I’ve read the entire work, and it’s still off. I’ve tinkered with some things about it, and it’s still off.

There’s nothing else for it.

I have to throw it all away and go back to the drawing board *sighs*

So disappointed in myself right now, because there’s so many things coming up that are partly written, and things coming up that I can’t wait to write. I don’t know why this is being difficult at all.

I just can’t figure it out.

Well, I am really struggling with this chapter. It’s mostly written, but… I had a specific format in mind, and I’ve kept to it, but it feels off, like I’ve inadvertently ruined the pacing. That’s odd, because I wanted to write this format to have a clear break between the prior slow burn/consummation vs the lead in to the war, which would require a change in pacing.

*scratches head*

As I check the word count, it seems like if I finish off the chapter as I planned, I might still have some room to play with it. I wonder if there’s some little aspect I can add that will make it work better. Hmm… *thinks*

Some of this chapter is written from the limited pov of the Lord of Light, and I’m hesitant to use that pov to do anything to regulate pacing, mood or atmostphere. It seems too transparent and heavy handed to do that. Probably because if I do that, it’d lead to a feeling of discontent in the reader. I’m not giving much away. If I use the pov like that, you’d expect to see more of the pov character’s motivations. Yet the other pov characters (the three of them) are dreaming, so I can’t use them. Beric is awake, but he’s being haunted. He’s also not a pov character.

I suppose I’ll feed the dogs while I think. This is a quandary. If I can’t fix it, I’m going to have to chuck it and think of something else altogether. But this felt right when I started it. Grrr!

Final read through commencing…

Currently wrestling with Tormund. He’s winning. Good job it’s not literally.

For a character who seems pretty simple on the surface, even in his own thoughts, this one is ridiculously deep. In fact, out of the three, he’s probably got a whole lot more going on than the other two once you dig down a bit.

I think it’s time for that last resort in getting right into a character: the fictional interview.

I kind of hate writing these, but in the absence of anyone to discuss it with, it’s the next best thing.

At least when this is done, I can drag them off to war. That should make for an interesting journey. All that sharing a tent business, the imperative need to stay absolutely silent no matter what… that will be fun for someone, I’m sure. Ok, that’s my reward! If I can just get over this little hurdle now…

Come on, Tormund, you obstinate sod!

*sighs*

Well, I think I’ve nearly done it. Almost seven thousand words. It needs finishing off so that it’ll lead into the next chapter, and it needs several read throughs, but… I’m actually kind of happy with it in the main, I think. And despite the word count, there’s no way I can split this up. I’ve been kind of cruel with cliffhangers, sure, but I think splitting this would rightly get me some bad karma, lol.

Either this is the hottest thing I’ve written for a good, long while, or… *gulps* I’m completely mistaken, and I’ll get a healthy dose of reality when I post it. Please, please, please, let it be the first one.

Okay, I guess I’ll begin those read throughs now. *takes a deep breath*

So, this morning it seems we pay the television license fee so that the BBC can invite dickheads on to Breakfast to justify shooting lions and elephants. No! F**k off!

Not the best start to the day. Gits.

*goes back to writing porn or whatever the hell this is*

I’ve finally caught up at least a little on my reading, and I’ve done my archive work, so now I’m gonna let myself write forthe rest of the evening, because Brienne is jumping up and down inside my head right now, and she’s all: “Thirty chapters! It’s my turn now! Write me!”

Gods, these three are demanding. To them, I swear I am just some weird version of Podrick with a pen… but it’s fun, all the same. Brienne’s pov or not, she’s got a surprise coming. The boys have something in mind, don’t they? Haha…  

I am back from my travels. I wasn’t sure we’d get off at all, since my mother had a gallstone attack (requiring an ambulance and hospital admission in the hours before we were due to set off), but happily they eventually gave her the all clear. Do NOT get me started on my aunt, who swanned off to the pub while I went in the ambulance, despite the fact that it was quite serious at that point. And we weren’t even packed. So when we were home, I got zero sleep. But… I got there, and I got to see some good dancers, listened to some great singers, and I got dressed up as a pirate for Whitby Abbey to see a shortish play based on Dracula, and lots of people took pictures of me, which means I probably did it right (or alternatively, very wrong). Internet evidence to the contrary should be kept to yourselves, please. I visited some castles. I stared at the sea, in the rain, in the hours before dawn, because I’m kind of weird like that, and because I hadn’t even had chance to look at the sea all week until that last morning when it was raining. But mostly because I’m a smoker, and it was either stare at the sea or just stand about outside the hotel looking at the wet road. I chose the sea.

I might be back at work on Monday. I really can’t recall if booked the day off. I’ll need to find out before then.

I’m awake again. So, earlier in the Asda, I was just innocently shopping, and this really tall blonde woman walked by me. Then kind of stopped, and looked down at little hobbit me, and smiled. My heart didn’t jump, it did some kind of strange figure eight move. She even had the short hair and everything. Not that I’m saying this was a Brienne lookalike. No. This was definitely a Gwendoline Christie lookalike. Though about ten or fifteen years younger.

I don’t object to this at all. I believe in my narrative wholeheartedly. Gwendoline Christie has to be one of the most beautiful women in the world. And Brienne is beautiful too, no matter what Martin might say. To those two right now she is. That’s okay.

What I do object to, is getting to the checkout, and finding myself looking around for ‘the big woman’ just in case she was there so that I could look at her again. It’s not as if I’ve even written that much of Tormund’s pov, ffs. :/

I swear, this story… *sighs*

This story is going to break me.

From dictionary corner today via Twitter:

Confelicity: a much-underused word meaning delight in someone else's happiness; the opposite of Schadenfreude.

I’ve written some of the next chapter. Regarding what I said earlier in the Promote A Story thread for this, I hope it’s not going to make me into a lazy writer, because that would be bad. I mean, I can guard against it all I like, but it’s likely I’ll unconsciously start to cut corners in terms of foreshadowing etc and I won’t even realise I’m doing it. Start off on the wrong path, and it’ll just get worse and worse, and this story deserves so much better from me.

It’s all very dispiriting.

Well, I’ve stayed up long enough to take the antibiotic, so it’s bedtime.

Well, despite being quite ill, I seem to have managed to complete another chapter. And it didn’t look like it was ever going to happen this one, so… bonus, I guess.

I don’t know. I guess I’ll just do the read through.

Maybe I’ll have a little lie down first… *groans* Perhaps with a couple of paracetamol.

Well, it’s got to be said. I don’t write het that often, but honestly I’m really enjoying myself here.

Wow… I was just sitting here, writing, thinking up interesting ways for Clegane to kill some people who had pissed him off, and then Tormund…

He happened to someone.

*whistles*

To be fair, he is kind of angry – well, furious –  but… bloodyhell… even Clegane is just standing there, in awe.

One down, one to go. *pats Clegane* Got to admit, I really didn’t like doing that… Poor bugger. I’d offer the muse a cookie, but I think he’d be happy to rip me apart with his bare hands right now.. *hides behind wall* He’ll never see this wall, no matter how many fires he dares to look into. Thank the Gods. Or something.

Right… I’m about to do something to the two male pov characters in my story that most men would call downright cruel. I’ve got them this far. To steal a phrase, only one thing could possibly win me greater glory: to stop them.

Women do feel this too, and in the morning Brienne’ll be so pissed off, she’ll likely decapitate a wooden training dummy or something in sheer frustration. Let’s hope there’s one around, or Podrick really will be in trouble in that chapter…

I am very, very evil. Especially with regards to the end of this, and my thoughts on the (potential!) eventual fate of these characters. Doesn’t bear thinking about. Unless you happen to be me. *looks well shifty… mutters about history… repeating… incest… Targaryen… insanity… fire… ice… *coughs*… craster… et cetera...*

If you didn’t shiver just then, you’re probably quite, quite lucky… 

I’m very excited.

There will be plotty bits in the next chapter. That’s not why I’m excited.

There will be Podrick in the next chapter. That’s not why.

There will be Jon Snow in the next chapter. Nope.

Tormund will be the pov character.

May work be over soon!

All of my work is done, I have the house to myself and all day to write NC-17 fanfiction. Let’s see if I can get to the ‘dog bed’ scene that started all this before supper tonight. I can  but try.

Chapters are delayed, but that doesn’t mean I’m not writing anything. For instance, while at work today, I had to stop to write, and that hasn’t happened to me for a good long while. Oh, and while I do intend to have lots of smutty fun, the evil side of my brain is busy planning some kind of wicked and horrific prologue thing full of murder, death, betrayal, history repeating itself and oh… just how impossible redemption is. Yes! I love being evil. I can’t help it. I’ve got two years to play with it before we get to see the real thing from Mr. Martin himself. I’m gonna have some fun!