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GeorgeGlass

Cleanup Crew
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Status Updates posted by GeorgeGlass

  1. I wonder who holds the record for most category requests? Because I’m starting to think it might be me.

  2. What I say: “Are any of you injured?” Amir asked.

    What my phone hears: “Are any of you injured? I'm your ass.”

    1. Desiderius Price
    2. Wilde_Guess

      Wilde_Guess

      “What my phone hears” sounds like a brilliant story prompt.  “Amir was an ordinary beat cop, doing his job and living his life.  Until, that is, his posterior became sapient and started loudly expressing its own diverging opinions.”

      Cheers!

  3. Good news, day 7:

    In the US Senate, a bipartisan bill has been introduced that would make the sellers of tickets to concerts and other live events give you the full price up front (ie, without hidden fees).

    https://variety.com/2023/music/news/senators-fans-first-bill-reform-ticketing-1235829396/

  4. Good news, day 6:

    A 2,100-year-old tomb with hundreds of relics was just unearthed in China. It is the oldest and largest archeological find in the Wulong District in Chongqing.

    https://themessenger.com/news/archaeologists-open-tomb-china-hidden-treasures-first-time

    1. Wilde_Guess

      Wilde_Guess

      They also found a letter written to the tomb’s late occupant reminding him that the warranty on his palanquin was about to expire.  😝 

  5. Good news, day 5:

    Lots of good news on the energy front: Oil and natural gas prices are falling, and America’s first offshore wind farm just went online.

  6. Good news, day 3:

    Scientists have discovered a class of molecules that appear to regenerate tooth pulp. This could make root canals obsolete.

    https://www.newsweek.com/teeth-pulp-regeneration-replace-root-canal-dentist-1849164

  7. Good news, day 2:

    Even though there’s a lot of talk about shoplifting these days, it’s less common now than it was before the pandemic. 

    Is Shoplifting Really Surging?

  8. There’s a lot of bad news out there these days. So I’ve decided that every day for the next week, I’ll post one piece of good news.

    To decrease summer heat and improve air quality, New York City’s city council has decided to up NYC’s tree canopy coverage from 22% to 30%. A lidar-based mapping system will be used to identify places where the new trees would do the most good.

    https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2023/nov/30/new-york-city-tree-planting-lidar-mapping

    1. BronxWench

      BronxWench

      We are already a remarkably green city, but I’m always eager to see less green areas of the city getting new trees. It makes such a tremendous difference!

  9. Lately, whenever I try to look at the reviews of any of my stories, my browser has been giving me the “Your connection is not private. Attackers might be trying to steal your information from cartoon.adult-fanfiction.org (for example, passwords, messages, or credit cards).” Is this happening to anyone else?

    1. Show previous comments  8 more
    2. manta2g

      manta2g

      We had some expired SSL cert duplicates, I’ve cleaned it up and things should resolve themselves over the next couple of days.

    3. BronxWench
    4. GeorgeGlass
  10. I know it’s cool to hate on Velma, but it’s actually an entertaining show. It’s funny, it’s sexy, and it’s fun to spot all the references to other old Hanna-Barbara cartoons. The only thing really “wrong” with it is that it’s not aimed at die-hard Scooby-Doo fans but at people like me who don’t mind it when they mock the source material.

    1. InvidiaRed

      InvidiaRed

      I will respectfully disagree. Velma is latest definition of skinsuiting in which people will take a beloved and old franchise and rather than develop their own setting and stories. Force their own story where it doesn’t belong in a setting where it doesn’t belong and it shows.

      Like the wolf that ate little red riding hood’s grandmother. We can see the imposter wearing a well defined character that obviously doesn’t fit. Like the roach in MIB wearing the farmer it hollowed out.

      Everyone thanks to popular culture knows these characters. And rather than give us more appreciation for Velma the character it constantly bludgeons you over the head that this isn’t Velma. Its neither quirky nor fun watching some creature badly pilot her corpse and trash the setting in which its supposed to be in.

      The dissonance only grows more disquieting and horrifying the longer it goes on.

    2. Wilde_Guess

      Wilde_Guess

      I also have to respectfully disagree.  Velma is worse than “just” skinsuiting.  It’s Woke Skinsuiting.  While one seldom wins credibility by citing Wikipedia, I have to quote the last two sentences of the second paragraph from their English language article on the show.  “Audience reception was overwhelmingly negative.  A second season is in development.”

      Woke Skinsuiting isn’t merely “cultural appropriation,” it’s “cultural mis-appropriation.”  It is no more and no less than the soulless gangrenous circus-mirror reflection of Pat Boone (badly) covering Little Richard songs in the 1950’s.  Even Warner Brothers, the modern owners of all the Hanna-Barbera intellectual property, who love the Woke Dollar just as much as any other corporate megalith, flat-out refused to allow Velma’s producers to give Norville a dog—lawyers at the ready and all.

      If someone were to Whitewash The Boondocks, Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids, or Dora the Explorer; or if they Whited out Hadji Singh from Jonny Quest, they would rightfully be ripped a new one.  Same-o same-o here.  If you want to create a cartoon series featuring lead characters of “non-perceived majority” demographics, then go for it!  But create that series, don’t just “Wokify” an existing one that is “too White” for you, especially if you don’t understand the original main characters and circumstances.

      Ret-conning the White out is fraught with peril at best, even if occasionally works.  For every Nick Fury, there are at least a dozen Velma Dinkleys or more.  In Fury’s case, you could make him Black all the way back to his WWII origins, and make him more believable as a character instead of less.  In the case of Velma, it’s somewhere between pointless and baloney.

      Velma won an amazing 40% on Rotten Tomatoes, with a seven percent audience score.  Perhaps they’re on to something?

       

    3. GeorgeGlass

      GeorgeGlass

      The first 10 things I can think of that are more worthy of outrage than Velma:
      1. The war in Ukraine
      2. The opioid crisis
      3. People dumping unwanted pets in public parks.
      4. Catalytic converter thefts. 
      5. Contractors who don't show up for weeks at a time while your kitchen remodel is only half finished.
      6. The fact that Honey Bunches of Oats contains more wheat, corn, and sugar than it does oats.
      7. Every Jaws movie after the first one. 
      8. HOAs that will fine you $500 for having pumpkins and Christmas decorations in your yard at the same time.
      9. The fact that Disney Plus has had season 1 of The Replacements since the service launched in 2019 but STILL doesn't have season 2.
      10. The astonishing lack of Hamster and Gretel r34 porn.
       

  11. “Okay Google, in 30 minutes, remind me to put lube on my bike chain."

    30 minutes later, I get “Put boob on my bike chain.”

    Sounds uncomfortable.

  12. Ever have a story idea so stupid that you had to write it, just to see if you could pull it off?

    I have had such an idea. It’s a furry story about four boys from a racoon-like race whose island home is under occupation by tiger-like invaders. The boys manage to find an ancient artifact that they hope will give them superpowers to drive the invaders away.

    Instead, the artifact turns them into a boy band. 

    God help me, the story going to be called “Band Together.”

    1. InvidiaRed

      InvidiaRed

      I thought you said stupid idea? Not awesome story prompt.

    2. WillowDarkling

      WillowDarkling

      it wasn’t a story for me, but a poem… I wrote two poems when I was a teen that were scenes of candy and soda… as in “the dark Dr. Pepper night”, and marshmallow cars… Candy floss (cotton candy) clouds, etc. I think the idea came from thinking about Candy floss as clouds, and possibly imagining sneakers made of liquorice or something like that. 

      Worst part was, they actually worked. Both of them! They weren’t even half bad, if I do say so myself. 

      If that isn’t the stupidest idea ever, I don’t know what is. Even for a sixteen year old… 

    3. InBrightestDay

      InBrightestDay

      I haven’t had an entire story idea that was like that, but I did have a scene recently where I was like “This is insane...and if I can pull it off it’s gonna be AWESOME!”

  13. What I say: "Hekapoo" (the name of a character from Star Vs. the Forces of Evil).

    What my phone hears: "Heckapoo," "pecapoo," "Hackaboo," "Packaboo," or "Hecka poop," depending on its mood.

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Desiderius Price

      Desiderius Price

      This phone has learned well.

    3. WillowDarkling

      WillowDarkling

      Your phone lives to make your life difficult, George, it’s time to face that fact, I think :D  :sobs with laughter too: 

    4. FairySlayer

      FairySlayer

      Your phone’s predictive algorithm is hella shit :P

  14. So I’m dictating dialogue into my phone for my upcoming story “The First Adam,” and my phone thinks Adam just whispered in Eve’s ear, “You were born to beat bread.”

    My question is, beat it at what?

    1. BronxWench

      BronxWench

      You know, it’s entirely possible that your phone holds the answer to world peace. Just sayin’…  :lol: 

    2. Desiderius Price
  15. My phone now has a bilingual mode, which means that it will do predictive typing in Spanish as well as English. So I was doing a Duolingo Spanish lesson and typing “Te gusta el…?” (“Do you like…?”), and the next word it suggests is “sexo.”

    Apparently, my phone thinks I’m a perv in any language. It’s right, but that’s not the point.

    1. Desiderius Price

      Desiderius Price

      I try to keep my perviness to a separate profile on my browser, always private mode with auto-clear on exit.  Mostly works.

    2. GeorgeGlass

      GeorgeGlass

      It’s not a browser; it’s Google Keyboard. It knows everything. :unsure:

    3. Desiderius Price

      Desiderius Price

      Figured that part, disclosing what *I* do to try to minimize… spills.  However, you don’t realize how much the search engines are listening until you ask how to unclog a bathtub trap.  Maybe try searching for dating sites?

  16. Being an American, I normally prefer to use American spelling. But I just can't bring myself to write "epilog" rather than "epilogue." "Epilog" reads like the output of an '80s computer program, or maybe the men’s version of the Epilady.

    1. Desiderius Price

      Desiderius Price

      Why’d I think of “Epipen” when I read “Epilog”?  Dunno.  Anyways, I agree, should be “Epilogue” IMO.

    2. InvidiaRed

      InvidiaRed

      is that a thing? Cause I’ve always written it as epilogue.

  17. Is it weird that I know exactly which Encanto character each of my cats would be? The hefty girl would be Luisa, the little girl who notices everything would be Dolores, and the boy who's always hiding would be Bruno.

  18. The definition of irony is wanting to scream at your cats, “Just live in fucking harmony goddamn it!”

  19. What I say: "He was a stallion in the truest sense."

    What my phone hears: "He was a scallion in the truest sense."

    So keep an eye out for my upcoming story about a sexy green onion.

  20. So, the post-Halloween trick-or-treater tally:

    • At least one kid dressed as an internet meme -- check
    • Multiple Elsas and Harley Quinns -- check
    • A whole family in themed costumes -- check
    • A hot mom in a borderline-inappropriate outfit -- checkity-doo
       
    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Desiderius Price

      Desiderius Price

      Nobody trick-or-treated to my house (I’m too far off the beaten path)

    3. InvidiaRed

      InvidiaRed

      @Desiderius Price you can’t count this anomalous year though the pandemic.

    4. Desiderius Price

      Desiderius Price

      @InvidiaRed It’s not like it was unexpected.  Eleven Halloweens at this house, and ZERO trick-or-treaters in that time.

  21. Do you think that when Theodore Maiman switched on the first laser at Hughes Research Laboratories in 1960, he realized that he was inventing the 20th century's greatest cat toy? :)

  22. Last night, I was adding "heavy cream" to my grocery list, and the two words my phone suggested after "heavy" were "breasts" and "balls." Phone, you know me far too well.

    1. Desiderius Price

      Desiderius Price

      “Phone, where have you been?  Dare I want to know?”

    2. FairySlayer

      FairySlayer

      If you were British and were adding “double cream” it would have been even wose. ;)

  23. I know it’s automated and generic, but I still like the birthday cake Bing made me.

    image.png.07d06553151757bdfdeb3b3daa263e9d.png

    1. Show previous comments  3 more
    2. Desiderius Price
    3. GeorgeGlass

      GeorgeGlass

      Thanks, everyone! I had a good one. 

      I think I like the cake pic because it reminds me of laser light shows from when I was a kid.

    4. FairySlayer

      FairySlayer

      Ooh! Congratulations on moving one year closer to becoming a curmudgeon like me. ;) BTW I think that neon cake looks hella cool (and much better than the one I made for someone when I was drawing). Here’s to another great year!  :beer:

  24. Big shout-out to @BronxWench for granting a hojillion category requests today!

    1. BronxWench

      BronxWench

      I do not question the mysterious ways of the Multiverse when handed strange new abilities. :lol: 

    2. Desiderius Price

      Desiderius Price

      Yeah, it was filling my feed too, but I figured it was somebody finally opening the suggestion box. :)

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